Resident Evil Truth or Dare
by Fox Mew Brittany
Summary: This is the first ever Resident Evil T/D fanfic. This was inspired by my friend Akako Hama, so please enjoy and send in your dares to torture the RE characters. Discontinued until further notice so no more dares will be sent in.
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own Resident Evil Capcom does.**

Fox Mew Brittany: Hi everyone I decided to start the first ever Resident Evil Truth or Dare fanfic. My Resident Evil OC Sora Avalon is the host; beware she is a pyromaniac when bored or has consumed enough sugary food and she has plagas powers; which means enhanced speed, strength, and aglility!

Wesker: Tell me again why you're doing this?

Sora: Cuz its fun Wezzy! So don't you go trying to kill the characters here or, (in scary voice) you'll suffer the wrath of my authoress powers.

Chris: There's no such thing as "authoress powers"

Fox Mew Brittany: yes there is, and Sora will have them along with her co-host who will arrive soon.

Sora: SWEET!!! (does a happy dance)

Jill: Great so we have a pyromaniac for a host and an unknown co-host

Fox Mew Brittany: He should be here about now. (looks at her watch and hears a door open and close) Right on time, come out in the open Josh!

All RE Characters: Who the hell is Josh!?

Fox Mew Brittany: Well he's not what you're expecting but don't be alarmed at what you're going to see.

Josh: (comes out in the open wearing a black hat, sunglasses, a bloody sweater, and bloody jeans. The claws on his hands and feet are easily seen.) The name's actually Joshua Norris, and as all of you may have noticed I'm a Licker but I'm one of a kind seeing as I can speak in sentences and walk on two legs instead of the usual four.

Wesker: HOLY ****!! (dies)

Sora: NO! (tried to perform CPR) He's not going to make it Joshua do something!

Joshua: (magically gets out a ECG machine and sets it to 60 volts) Everyone clear! (Zaps Wesker with the ECG machine and revives him) He's okay, he's going to live.

FMB: Sora, you do know that you could've used your authoress powers to revive him..... right?

Sora: I panicked.

Wesker: What happened? (sees Joshua and dashes away)

Joshua: Why do people do that when they see me?

Leon: It's because of the fact that you're, I don't know, a LICKER!!!

Claire: Even I have to admit that its disturbing that a Licker can walk on two legs and talk.

Sora: Don't be mean to my co-host! He's cute and adorible. Ohh and before I forget Chris, Frost (pulls out a lighter attached to a can of hair spray) TORCHING TIME!!!

Chris and Frost: **** (Runs off but got shocked when they tried to leave the room)

Rebecca: Great now we're trapped! This is worse than being in the mansion with all those zombies and other creatures.

Sora: ohh and speaking of zombies (Claps hands twice and a spotlight shines on a stage to reveal about 10 zombies and Joshua holding a boom box playing Michael Jackson's "Thriller" then the zombies start dancing to the music)

Chris, Wesker, and Leon: WTF (Raising their guns)

Sora and Joshua: Don't even think about it (uses author powers to take away the guns thus allowing the zombies to finish their dance)

FMB: Send in your truths and dares so we can enjoy the results. I will not be part of this fic, see ya. (disappears)


	2. A long chapter

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil Capcom does, also I do not own Knuckles the Echidna Sega owns him.**

Sora: Horray we got a dare from Akako Hama! Ohh and since this is a new chapter Wesker, you get to be a superhuman again (uses authoress powers to return Wesker back to normal but ended up being held by Rebecca)

Rebecca: EKK!! (ran off after letting Wesker go)

Wesker: You are dead Sora. (Pulls out a magnum and shot Sora in the head)

Joshua: Damnit Wesker (revives Sora) don't do that again! But now we have a dare from Akako Hama.

_Chris, Frost, Wesker: Time for the third ever idiot olympics, Wesker your  
here to make things easier for Chris. You will be going agianst the two-time  
champion Knuckles the Echidna!  
The challanges are; Spelling easy words, chemestry, playing an instrament,  
and suicide. The host of my truth or dare and the co-host shall aid in  
commentary, they are Hoshi Akuma, and Veronica the Hedgehog! Winner gets a  
shiny! Losers get thrown to the fangirls!_

Joshua: Get your brother to Roundhouse kick chris and Knuckles right after  
the losers get away from the fangirls.

Chris, Frost, and Wesker: IDIOT OLYMPICS!!!

Wesker: Wait a damn minute are you and Akako Hama insisting that I'm stupid.

Joshua: No you're just in the olympics to make things easier on Chris.

Frost: I WANT SHINY!!

Sora: Then..... TO THE ARENA!!!! (Takes Wesker, Chris, and Frost to a Roman Colliseum by using her authoress powers)

**// At the Colliseum //**

Joshua: And since this is the third ever Idiot Olympics, we have the two-time champion; Knuckles the Echidna! (Brings out the red echidna from SonicX). For commentary and will only be in this chapter; the host and co-host of "Another Violent Truth or Dare" Hoshi Akuma and Veronica the Hedgehog!

Hoshi: Welcome to the third ever Idiot Olympics!

Veronica: The poor people who lose these olympics challenges will get thrown to the fangirls (Points to a pit with screaming fangirls)

Hoshi: The winner gets a shiny gold coin!

Knuckles and Frost: GIVE ME SHINY!!!! (tries to steal the coin but Joshua stops them)

Joshua: No, you have to win the olympics to get the shiny.

Wesker: So we're competing in these games for a stupid, worthless coin! (eyes flash red through the sunglasses)

Hoshi and Veronica: YES!!

Hoshi: First challenge is "Spelling easy words"!

Veronica: Chris, your word is "go"

Chris: Okay I'm ready give me my word.

Veronica: No your word is "go"

Chis: Just give me my word!

Hoshi: Chris Redfield just spell the word "GO"!!! (Brings out her Broken Butterflies and aims at Chris)

Chris: okay, "Go"....... uhh, G-E-U-X, "go"?

Veronica: Oh my god, Chris, I can't believe that you're that much of an idiot! Next up is Knuckles, your word is "Cat"

Knuckles: "T"

Hoshi: As expected from our two-time champion. Our next contestant is Albert Wesker and your word is "Philemaphobia"

Wesker: You've got to be kidding me, Fear of kissing? Fine I'll spell it "Philemaphobia" P-H-I-L-E-M-A-P-H-O-B-I-A, "Philemaphobia"

Veronica: Ohh I'm sorry Wesker but you lost this challenge.

Wesker: WHAT!? (Gets an angry twitch)

Hoshi: Lastly Frost, your word is "Tea"

Frost: (Holds up a coffee container) Tea (points at the coffee)

Veronica: Wow we have three winners and one loser! Next challenge.... Chemestry!

Wesker: This is a piece of cake, Chemestry is one of my majors.

Hoshi: Everyone knows that, that's why you were a scientist for Umbrella but everyone take your stations and create a solution to melt metal.

Knuckles: I made goop (Points to his table which was covered in pinkish-purple goop then comes to life and tries to eat Knuckles but gets slashed to pieces by Joshua and shot by Sora)

Chris: (his chemecals blow up in his face and dyed his hair blonde) Damnit I look like Wesker now (looks at his now blonde hair in the reflective surface of his work station)

Frost: I don't feel so good (clutching his stomache)

Veronica: Frost you didn't drink those chemecals.... did you?

Frost: I thought it was grape soda! (runs away and reguritates the chemicals.)

Wesker: Imbeciles (dumps his chemical solution on a piece of metal and a hole is made)

Hoshi: Again we have three winners for this round and those are; Chris, Frost, and our two-time champion Knuckles!

Wesker: Are you blind!? I created a chemical solution that ate through the efing metal (Rips off his sunglasses and crushes them in anger) Damnit I just bought those two days ago (pulls out another pair of shades and puts them on.)

Veronica: I swear I think that Wesker has an infinite supply of sunglasses but onto our third challenge, the challengers have to play an instrument!

Hoshi: Contestants choose your instrument of choice. (Point to a pile of musical instruments next to the four challengers)

Knuckles: (grabs a kazzoo and eats it) that jerky was to hard (hicups and the kazzoo makes its sound)

Frost: I've always wanted to play the tuba (picks up a tuba and puts it on his head)

Chris: Paws off the electric guitar (dives for the guitar before anyone could do a thing) time to rock and roll!!! (does double peace signs and plays the guitar horribly)

Hoshi: My ears! (covers her ears) Chris stop playing (Shoots the electric guitar out of Chris' hands)

Veronica: What instrument do you think Wesker's going to get? (looks anxiously at what Wesker will choose)

Wesker: (picks up a violin and plays a sad yet beautiful melody)

All Girls in the stands except Hoshi: (starts crying because of the melody)

Veronica: I hate to do this but Wesker loses once more but Chris is joining him since he was able to play an instrument (drying her eyes) how long does it take for one man to realize that in these games you have to lose them not win (whispers to Hoshi)

Hoshi: Don't ask me I don't know (whispers back to Veronica) and now our final event......SUICIDE!!!

Knuckles: What's suicide?

Wesker: Suicide is when you intentionally kill yourself.

Chris: How the hell do we do that?

Hoshi: I'm glad you asked, Joshua bring out our device for this last challenge!

Joshua: Got it (Pulls a giant gasoline tank behind him and Sora is carrying a box of matches) Sora don't you dare go pyro on me

Sora: Don't worry Joshua I won't (smiles innocently but pulls out a match)

Everyone in the arena: NO!!!

Sora: I'm not going to light it near the gas (hears a wave of relieved sighs) but I am going to light it near Chris and Frost.

Chris: WHAT?!

Frost: SWEET!!

Veronica: Sora you can torch them after the final challenge.

Sora: Fine (crosses her arms in disappointment and throws the match away)

Wesker: There's no way in hell I'm getting in that gasoline, count me out.

Chris: I'm not that stupid to commit suicide! No way you're making me go in there! (backs away from the tank fill to the brim in gasoline)

Frost: CANNONBALL!!! (does a cannon ball in the gas)

Knuckles: SLUSHIE!!! (takes a match from Sora, lites it and dives in to the gas to be burnt alive)

Hoshi: We have our winner, the now three time champion of the idiot olympics, Knuckles the Echidna!

Sora: (revives Knuckles and hands him a gold coin) here's your prize Knuckles

Knuckles: YAY!!! (eats the coin) Where's my shiny?

Wesker: You idiot echidna, you just ate your coin.

Sora: Now that the olympics are over Chris, Frost, Wesker, you three get to meet your fangirls! (pushes all three men into the fangirl pit)

Fangirls: YAY!!!!!!!!

Hoshi and Veronica: Well its time to get back to our Truth or Dare fanfic bye. (Leaves through a white mirror thanks to Hoshi's powers)

**// Back at the studio where the fic started in //**

Sora: okay before we get to the other dares Joshua could you go get the two idiots and the crazy blonde back from the fangirls please.

Joshua: on it (Brings Chris, Frost and Wesker back but Wesker had his hair messed up, glasses gone, black trench coat torn to shreds, his pants were gone, and his shirt was torn to where anyone could see his abs.)

Sora: (puts her hand over her eyes) uhh Wesker would you like some new clothes seeing as you're now standing in the studio in your underwear.

Wesker: yes... I would appreciate some clothes. (slicks his hair back to the way it was)

Joshua: here are some clothes I manages to scrap up (hands Wesker a black muscle shirt, baggy black jeans and boots)

Wesker: (takes the clothes and gets dressed)

Sora: Hey Joshua you get to call up your brother.... I didn't know you had a brother.

Joshua: Yeah I'm Chuck Norris' little brother.

Chris: Who's Chuck Norris?

(a man kicks the door in and walks into view)

Chuck: That's me, where's my baby brother (Grabs Chris by the collar of his shirt)

Joshua: I'm right here Chuck (Waves to his brother)

Chuck: Oh my god, what happened to you, who did this to you?

Joshua: T-virus experimentation, and the dude in all black over there is partly responsible for this (Points to Wesker) but other than that you know why you're here.

Chuck: Yeah to roundhouse kick Chris and this person called Knuckles. Who is this Knuckles?

Knuckles: ME!!! (jumps in front of Chuck Norris)

Joshua: you can kick these two as hard as you want. I don't think the red echidna has a brain so your kick won't cause brain damage.

Chuck: Alright then (Roundhouse kicks Chris and Knuckles all the way to Pluto) Oops, uhh Josh did you need those two?

Joshua: The echidna needs to go back to another fanfic but I'll instruct Chris on how to get back here. Thanks for your help bro.

Chuck: No prob if you ever need me don't be afraid to call, see ya (Leaves the studio)

Sora: Umm Joshua, how are you going to get Chris back?

Joshua: Simple my dear Sora. (pulls out a radio) Chris, come in Chris.

**// Pluto //**

Chris: Great now I'm stuck on Pluto with an idiot echidna from a kids TV show with no way back to earth! (hears his radio go off) Hello?

Joshua: Chris, about time you answered me but now listen carefully in order to get back to the studio in one piece you have to use the catapult.

Chris: What catapult?

Joshua: I'm sure there's one on Pluto just look around and also could you pick up a t-shirt from the souverir stand.

Chris: I found the souvenir stand and I got the shirt but.... oh wait I just now realized that I'm in the catapult.

Joshua: Good now do you see a lever that activates the catapult?

Chris: No I..... Knuckles NOO!!!

Knuckles: POCKY (pulls the lever thus activating the catapult and the lever broke from Knuckles ripping it out and flying back to earth with Chris but Knuckles ends up going back to Akako Hama's truth or dare fanfic)

**// Back in the Studio //**

Joshua: By the sound of that Chris should be here in 3...2...1.. now (Chris fall through the roof and on the consession stand)

Sora: Great timing and here's our next dare from Tyrant Wolf and this is good news for Chris and Wesker.

_LOL! I got a dare fore some of you's!_

_sora: I dare you to turn wesker into a cat useing your authoress powers!xD(and keep him like that for the whole chapter)_

_wesker: when sora turns you into a cat (if she does) I dare you to let anyone  
pet you without you hissing, growling, or hurting anyone oh and pur like a  
good kitty (DO IT OR I'LL TAKE YOUR PRECIOUS SUNGLASSES!)_

_chris: I dare you to say your a pretty princess 50 times while wearing a pink tutu!_

Sora: Wesker you have to be turned into a cat and allow anyone to pet you without hissing, growling, or hurting anyone. And you have to purr like a good kitty for the whole chapter! (laughing evily)

Wesker: Hell no!

Sora: Too bad (uses authoress powers and turns Wesker into a cat) aww you're so adorible as a kitty Wesker. (Pets Wesker whose shaking vigorously)

All Girls of RE: Aww a kitty!!! (runs to Wesker the cat and start petting him and scratching his back, ears, and underneath his chin)

Kitty Wesker: (purrs from all the attention he's getting)

Joshua: Ohh Chris time to get into your pink tutu (holds up a frilly pink tutu) and say that you're a pretty princess 50 times.

Chris: WHAT!!!! There is no force on Earth that will make me wear that tutu and say "I'm a pretty princess" 50 times.

Joshua: (uses powers to put Chris in the tutu and brings out his Licker tongue) say you're a pretty princess 50 times or else I'm stabbing you with my tongue!

Chris: Okay, okay I'll do it. (takes a deep breath) I'm a pretty princess....

// 49 "I'm a Pretty Princess" later //

Chris: There I'm done, now get me out of this damn tutu! (Trying to get the tutu off but fails)

Joshua: Fine (uses author powers to remove the tutu)

Kitty Wesker: (Looking at Sora with eyes saying "Return me to normal or else")

Sora: No you have to be a kitty for the rest of the chapter.

Jill: Hey you guys where did Wesker go? (Has kitty Wesker in her arms)

Sora: In your arms. (coughing to hint the words)

Ada: So this is what Wesker has become under the power of the pyro authoress.

Joshua: Just be prepared to face his wrath when he turns back to normal.

Barry: When will that be?

Sora: When the chapter ends!

Joshua: okay this has been an interesting chapter there was Wesker and Chris torture, hope you send in more dares and now to close out here's a new dance from our zombie dance team! (Claps twice and a spotlight shines on stage to show the same zombies from last chapter but this time they're dancing to "Cotten-eye Joe")


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil Capcom does and I don't own Knuckles the Echidna Sega own him.**

Sora: (had headphones on and was rocking out to what sounded like "Nymphetamine (Overdose)" by Cradle of Filth)

Joshua: SORA!!!!

Sora: (pulles out one of the ear pieces) yes Joshua?

Joshua: we have a fanfic to host, and we have many dares to do so get your act together. (Hands Sora a review from Tyrant Wolf)

Sora: Here's are two dares from Tyrant Wolf.

_HAHA! that was fun! now fore more torture!...WITH DARES!_

wesker: I dare you to put on a cute fluffy hamster suit and do the hamster  
dance and say cheep cheep as you dance!

chris: I dare you to watch all the episodes of barney ever made!  
MUAHAHAHAHA!

p.s. you can't get me! nananana boo-boo! hahaHA! (i'm such a jerk)

Wesker: Tyrant Wolf wants me to do what now?

Joshua: He dares you to put on a cure fluffy hamster suit and do the hamster dance while saying "cheep cheep"

Wesker: You're efing insane!

Sora: (Snaps her fingers and Wesker is in a fluffy hamster suit) Do the hamster dance hammy boy!

Wesker: When I take over the world you'll be the first to go (starts doing the hamster dance and cheeps)

Sora: You wish but admit it, you have a lovely carreer as a mascot dancer right now.

Wesker: (Gives Sora the bird or otherwise known as the middle finger)

Sora: I know God's #1 you don't have to tell me that.

Joshua: (face palms and shakes his head disapprovingly) Chris get yourself ready for the pychological torture that is Barney. (mystically obtains all the barney episodes ever made)

Chris: No I hated Barney as a child, I'm not going to watch him now!

Joshua: Too bad (uses powers to chain Chris to a chair, placed a TV in front of him and inserted the first few episodes of Barney) Enjoy.

// many episodes of Barney later //

Chris: MAKE IT STOP!!! I CAN'T TAKE IT!!! (quivering from the pychological damage that the barney episodes caused him)

Claire: Poor Chris, he never did like that purple dinosaur. He always said it was evil and he'd steal your soul if you watch him too many times.

Joshua: Thank god that all the episodes are through (unchains Chris and makes the TV and Barney tapes disappear)

Sora: Wesker's done with the dance, but now he's angry with me for what I said (sees a Barney doll) If you'll excuse me there's something I have to destroy..... DIE BARNEY!!!! (holds an ax over her head) wait what am I doing with an ax I'm a pyro. (thows it behind her and get out a flamethrower) Now... DIE!! (torches the Barney doll) The menace is gone, lets continue with the fanfic. This is from Akako Hama.

_Funny!_

Chris: Hold this giant Emerald and do NOT sell it. (Hoshi: HEY KNUCKLES! I  
found the Master Emerald the guy you got the pocky from has it!)

Wesker: Hoshi says hi, Cousin Albert! Also What do you think of the yoai  
fangirls pairing you with Chris? Just so you know you were supposed to mess up  
in every challange except for suicide on the idiot olympics.

Claire: I have nothing agianst you but, your death shall be pick via Wheel of  
Morality.

Frost: Experience Kennith's death ten times, followed by your own ten times.

Kennith: Frost's death ten times, then your own.

Bye, and Hoshi has been studying under Chuck Norris. Wesker be proud of your  
cousin.

Chris: (Recieves the giant emerald) Wait what am I supposed to do with a giant emerald if I'm not supposed to sell it?

Sora: Uh oh (Backs far away from Chris)

Chris: What?

Knuckles: How dare you steal the Master Emerald! You gave me pocky so you can steal the Master Emerald! (somehow appears and beat Chris to death, takes back the Master Emerald and goes back to where ever he came from)

Joshua: (revives Chris) You okay Chris?

Chris: HELL NO!! I got beat to death by a red echidna with dreadlocks all because he thought I stole an emerald from him and I got revived back into this death trap

Joshua: Other than that you're alright, (turns to Wesker who's sitting in a chair with a cup of coffee) Wesker you're cousin Hoshi says hi, and what do you think of the yaoi fangirls pairing you and Chris together.

Wesker: (does a spit take with his coffee) What the hell is wrong with those girls!? Don't they know I despise Chris?

Sora: Yes they do but obviously they like pairing you two together. And Wesker did you know that you were supposed to mess up the challenges except for the suicide in the idiot olympics.

Wesker: (eyes flash red in fury and he crushes his coffee cup in his hand)

Sora: But be proud, Hoshi has been studying under Chuck Norris please be proud of your cousin and not mad at me! (getting ready to take cover behind Joshua)

Joshua: Claire its time for you to spin the "Wheel of Morality" (Shows Claire the Wheel of Morality)

Claire: What the hell is the "Wheel of Morality"?

Sora: Spin it and find out.

Claire: Fine (walked up to the wheel and spins it, then it lands on a picture of spikes)

Joshua: ohh death by impalement nice choice

Claire: WHAT?!

(then out of the blue spikes appear out of nowhere and impale Claire)

Chris: NOO!!! (goes into a mental breakdown)

Sora: Uhh Chris, Joshua and I can bring her back, there's no need to go wacko on us. (revives Claire) So Claire how does it feel to be impaled?

Claire: You S.O.B!!!

Joshua: Well that answers your question Sora. Now Frost time for you to experience Kenneth's death and yours ten time each, Kenneth same goes for you.

Kenneth: Frost how'd you die?

Frost: I gotten eaten alive by Cerberi, you?

Kenneth: I got my throat eaten out by a zombie and I was still alive.

Frost and Kenneth: Ohh no!

// 40 excrutiating deaths and revivals later //

Frost: So much death... so many times my life flashed before my eyes (cowering in a corner in the feedle position with Kenneth)

Sora: Wow who knew that repeating their deaths so many times would cause a mental breakdown?

Joshua: I didn't, I only died once then became a Licker.

Sora: Well that wraps up this chapter, we need more truths and dares, so please review. Zombie Dance Team, dance us out. (The spotlight shines on stage to reveal the same zombies but in matching uniforms dancing to the "Macerena")


	4. Another long chapter

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil, all I own is Sora and Joshua.**

Sora: Yay we got great dares from Tyrant Wolf and sorry for mistaking you for a guy, I didn't know you were actually a girl but nethertheless here comes the torture!!!

_wesker: I dare you to die your hair pink dress like a pink ballerina with the  
same tutu chris wor and say i'm a ** that loves pink and has a crush on chris  
200 times (oh and take of your glasses and put frilly pink make-up on)_

_chris: I dare you to fight a zombiefied dragon with nothing but a  
butter-knife_

_jill: after chris is done fighting the dragon make-out with him for atleast  
60 seconds_

_chris & wesker: once your done with everything else FIGHT TO THE DEATH  
(winner gets to be free of one of my dares and the loser...well lets just say  
that I hope your prepaired to dress like pinocchio and sing "i've got no strings"  
on public telivision)_

Chris and Wesker: WTF!?

Chris: There is no possible way I can fight a zombie dragon with a butter knife, what the hell can I do with a butter knife huh?

Wesker: I hate my dare

Joshua: But you have to do it, you have absolutely no say in the matter and besides after yours and Chris' are over you get to fight to the death! (walks over to Sora and whispers) We all know who's going to win this one.

Sora: You got that right Joshua. (Whispers back then turns to Wesker) Now Wezzy time to dye your hair pink, dress like a ballerina with the same tutu Chris wore and say "I'm a ** that loves pink and has a crush on Chris" along with putting on pink make-up and removing your glasses.

Wesker: NO!

Joshua: (Brings out his Licker tongue and looks like he's going to kill) Do it NOW!

Wesker: ........... Give me the dye. (Holds out his hand for the pink dye)

Sora: Here you go and have fun (Hands Wesker the pink hair dye with tongs)

Joshua: Sora why?

Sora: Pink is evil, and if I touch it I'll probably be evil to. It won't bother Wesker because he's already an evil psychopath.

Wesker: HEY! (snatches the bottle out of the tongs and walk to a changing room)

// an hour later //

Jill: I'm actually afraid to see what Wesker looks like in pink

Rebecca: Me too

(Wesker then comes out in the open with pink hair, pink make-up, and wearing the ballerina getup with the pink tutu)

Birkin: Omg, Albert what have they done to you?

Sora: Nuff of that, now Wesker you have something to say 200 times.

Wesker: Fine. I'm a ** that loves pink and has a crush on Chris.....

// 199 "I'm a ** that loves pink and has a crush on Chris" later //

Wesker: There I said it you happy now?

Sora: Yes, I'm very pleased Albert (Spun in a spinning chair to face him) and so are your fangirls since they were watching and seen your abs.

Wesker: WHAT?!

Joshua: Ohh shut it now Chris time to face your dare and here's your faithful weapon (Hands Chris a butter knife) use it well. (pushes Chris in a giant cage with the zombie dragon)

Chris: Ohh **** (Tries to slit his throat but no luck, then tries to stab his head only to cause minor head pains.)

Zombie Dragon: (Charges at Chris but he quickly dodges while trying to commit suicide and ultimately failing)

Jill: Come on Chris! You gotta live, I was dared to make out with you after this!

Chris: HOW THE HELL CAN I WIN THIS! ALL I HAVE IS A DAMN BUTTER KNIFE! (dodging another of the dragon's attempts on his life)

Sora: Use the knife, it can't cut human skin but it can cut the zombie dragon's skin!

Chris: IT CAN WHAT?! (took his eyes off the dragon to glare at Sora)

Zombie Dragon: (ate Chris' head then spat it out) His skull's too thick, (ate the rest of the body but spits it out) I hate the taste of men, I prefer women better.

Joshua: ohh sorry here's Excella (Throws Excella to the dragon)

Zombie Dragon: Thanks (Eats Excella)

Wesker: May I ask why you did that?

Joshua: Not my idea, it was Sora's (points to Sora who is somehow dressed in a black combat outfit but has a leather coat with the Los Illuminados insignia on it)

Sora: I hate Excella, she dresses inappropriate in the worst of situations, but aside from what's going on right now Jill (spun the chair to face her) time to make out with Chris!

Jill: Aren't you going to bring him back?

Sora: I thought about it but it's more torturous for you to make out with Chris when he's dead and just his head.

Jill: and covered in dragon saliva.

Sora: Everyone always has to whine about something, here's a rag (tosses Jill a rag) wipe off the head and get your dare over with, I want to see the fight to the death between Chris and Wesker!

Jill: Fine (Wipes off the saliva and makes out with Chris' head for 60 seconds) There I done it now bring him back to life.

Sora: Kay (snaps her fingers and Chris is revived) Now for the last dare from Tyrant Wolf, the fight to the death between Wesker and Chris!

Joshua: Winner gets to be free of one of her dares while the loser dresses up like Pinocchio and sing "I've Got No Strings" on public TV

(Before anyone could blink Wesker dashes to Chris and rips him limb from limb)

Sora: Could you have made that fight last longer and less messy, we don't have a janitor yet!

Joshua: Calm down Sora we'll get one soon and as obvious who the winner is, Wesker, here's a pass to get out of ONE of Tyrant Wolf's dares (hands Wesker a piece of paper that has "Get Out of One Dare" written on it and revives Chris)

Chris: Damn that hurts!

Joshua: ohh suck it up, now its time for your debut as Pinocchio (holds up an outfit similar to Pinnochio's)

Chris: God save me! (takes the outfit and changes)

Sora: Smile pretty for the camera! (has a television camera in the studio and pointed it at Chris)

Chris: "I've got no strings  
To hold me down  
To make me fret, or make me frown  
I had strings  
But now I'm free  
There are no strings on me

Hi-ho the me-ri-o  
That's the only way to go  
I want the world to know  
Nothing ever worries me"

All RE Characters including Sora and Joshua: (Laughing at the TV screen showing Chris singing and dancing to the song "I've Got No Strings")

Joshua: Here's some dares from Akako Hama!

_I'm back!_

_Leon: Pin Wesker to the wall and shoot an outline of him, try not to miss._

_Chris: Jump off the empire state building._

_Wesker: Here's a rocket launcher, you can shoot anyone but Sora and Joshua._

_Sora: Here's an infinate flamethrower, have fun._

_Frost: You are about to die, you must give Hoshi ten bags of sugar.  
The apocolypse has begun, Sora, Joshua run to the moon you'll be safe and say  
hi to Veronica._

Leon: this should be fun (looking at Wesker evily)

Wesker: **** (then all of a sudden gets strapped to a wall) WTF!?

Sora: Here's your Chicago Typewriter Leon (hands Leon his infinite machine gun)

Leon: Thanks Sora (takes the machine gun and starts firing an outline of Wesker until it he misses and hits Wesker's happy place) oops

Wesker: ****!!!!!! (Tries to break free of the restraints but fails)

Leon: Can I try to get that last part again?

Joshua: By all means.

Sora: JOSHUA!

Joshua: What?

Leon: (Successfully shoots the last outline and releases Wesker from his restrains)

Wesker: I am going to kill you! (menacingly begins to walk towards Leon)

Sora: No you're not (obtains her infinite flamethrower, steps between Wesker and Leon and aims it at Wesker) one step closer to Leon and I will burn you to a crisp.

Joshua: Hey you guys Chris still has to jump off the Empire State Building, anyone wanna watch?

All the RE Characters except Chris: YEAH!!!

**// At the Empire State Building //**

Sora: alright Chris time for you to jump.

Chris: There is no way in hell that I will jump off this building!

Sora: Fine then you leave me no choice but to use drastic measures...... WESKER Chris called you an idiotic baffoon who doesn't know how to win the olympics for surpreme intellegence!

Wesker: WHAT!!!!!! (brings out his Lightning Hawk and aims it at Chris)

Chris: HOLY **** (Jumps off the building but got shot in the butt by Wesker)

Chris' Fangirls: Get ready to catch him (huddled together to catch Chris at the bottom)

(By the time Chris lands he died from being shot by Wesker and the fangirls are fighting to try to hug him and whatever it is fangirls do)

Joshua: Well that was fun to watch but now time to get back to the studio to get the rest of our dares in.

**// Back in the Studio //**

Chris: (Revived by Sora and in complete pain from the fall and fangirls) I never knew fangirls were so vicious.

Wesker: I knew but I never knew I had a lot of them

Sora: Well DUH! You would have a ton of them fangirls love the bad guys it's a proven fact, ohh and Wesker here's your rocket launcher you can use it on anyone besides me and Joshua. (gives Wesker his rocket launcher)

Wesker: Damnit (has the rocket launcher aimed at Sora but then aims it at Chris) you're the next best thing to blow to hell.

Chris: Wesker I died way too many times in this chapter can you please save it for next chapter?

Wesker: No (shoots Chris with the rocket launcher then shoots Sheva, Excella, Frost, Brian Irons, and Sergei Vladmir)

Joshua: I see you're really happy with your new weapon. (revives everyone Wesker killed) We really need a janitor.

Sora: I already found one, here he is (brings in a zombie wearing a custodial uniform with a name tag that reads "Stew")

Joshua: Sora...... that's a zombie.

Sora: Yes one that's a janitor, go on Stew clean up.

Stew: (takes a mop and cleans the floor while moaning like all zombies do)

Sherry: EEKKK!!!! Zombie!! (hides behind her parents)

Annette and William: Why hire a zombie janitor?!

Sora: Cuz we need one and I wanted one that was undead.

Every RE Character known to man: (Face palms and shakes their head disapprovingly)

Frost: Okay since I'm about to die, Hoshi here's 10 bags of sugar. (hands Hoshi, who somehow came into this fanfic, 10 bags of sugar)

Sora, Joshua, and Wesker: FROST!!!!

Sora: Joshua quick to the moon! Akako said it was safe there! (uses authoress powers to send her and Joshua to the moon, not knowing that Wesker had hitched a ride)

**// The Moon //**

Sora: (sees Veronica) Hey Veronica, how are you?

Veronoica: Fine but isn't that Hoshi's cousin? (Points to Wesker)

Joshua: Wesker?! How the hell did you get to the moon?

Wesker: I hitched a ride with you and Sora, you two know as well as I do what happens when Hoshi has sugar.

(Then there's a huge explosion and the Earth has exploded thanks to Hoshi being sugar high)

Sora: Damn Wesker your cousin is worse than me when I'm sugar high.

Wesker: What do you do when you have a sugar rush.

Sora: That's for me to know and you along with the rest of the Resident Evil characters to find out. (smiles evily)

Joshua: O-kaay, um (looks at his watch) Hoshi would have passed out by now so we can use our powers to restore the Earth and the RE characters and get back since we have three more sets of dares to fulfill.

Sora: alright (uses author powers with Joshua to restore the Earth and the RE characters) see ya Veronica! (heads back to the studio with every RE character revived) So how was the apocalypse?

Every RE Character except Wesker: IT WAS HELL ON EARTH!!!!!

Joshua: Quit yer whining just be glad its over and Hoshi's going back to her Sonic Truth or Dare fic. But now onto our next set of dares from LovelyandDeadlyLiliesandRoses.

_Ello!! I'm one of akakos fans and my friend chu here a pandagirl works as a  
Head officer is yaoi fan girl so here she is  
Chu:*comes out* Ello peeps and josh you are such a cutey! *glomps josh* ok  
the dares *laughs evilly* ok wesker u dare you to kiss chris for one whole  
hour two I want you to do the caramel dansen with him three I want you to  
marry him!  
Chris I dare you to accept the marriage two I want you to be mpreggies and  
three I want them to be twins four next I want you you to make hoshi to be one  
one of the godmothers and me rose to be one also!!  
Um leon I want you to marry that dude the scientist from the game I forgot ok  
sorry ya know the person you meet up sometimes it's a dude k who died ok  
that's byes!!_

Wesker: ldlr wants me to do what now?

Joshua: ldlr wants you to kiss Chris for one whole hour, do the caramel dansen with him and to marry him.

Chris: I will not kiss Wesker nor marry him, that's just sick and wrong!

Sora: Like you have a choice and I've watched the caramel dansen on youtube and it's basically the same movement over and over until the song is over.

Wesker and Chris: Whatever

Sora: Do your dares before I torch you two and bring you back to life just to do it again!

Wesker and Chris: Fine (distainfully look at eachother and kiss for an hour)

Sora: I'm going to be sick!! (runs to the bathroom to vomit)

Girls of RE including William: This is disturbing.

(Once an hour passed Wesker and Chris grabbed mouth wash and started rinsing their mouths out)

Wesker: So now we have to do this "caramel dansen"

Sora: Yes and so you won't be completely lost I'll have a video playing

(The Caramel Dansen video starts playing, Chris and Wesker were having a hard time keeping up with the pace)

Chris: Wesker how the hell did we end up in this situation? (starting to get the hang of parts of the dance)

Wesker: Don't ask me I haven't the slightest clue. (keeping up with the song)

(Once the dance ends Chris falls to the ground out of breath while Wesker was getting some air into his lungs from dancing at a fast pace)

Joshua: Time to hear Wesker's proposal and Chris accepting it.

Sora: Oh god, I'm out (leaves the room)

Wesker: I can't believe I'm doing this but Chris (gets down on one knee) will....you...marry....me (looking as if about to throw up)

Chris: God as much as I want to decline, I have no choice but to accept.

Joshua: Since Sora is in the restroom time for Chris to have twins!

Chris: WHAT?! Men can't have children it's physically impossible, only women have children.

Joshua: It's only possible in a fanfic when the host and co-host have author powers so be prepared to suffer that what is known as giving birth. (uses author powers to make Chris pregnant with twins and go through giving birth)

Chris: Oh Christ that hurts!

Joshua: Crap we need to do a C-section!

Chris: WTF is that?!

Joshua: The squemish should look away. (Holds up a scapel and cuts open Chris' gut to get the twins out) They're twin boys, congratulations Chris, Wesker! (Hands Chris his baby boys and heals Chris' stomache)

Wesker: Great now I have two heirs to complete my plan if anything were to happen to me

Chris: You will not expose the boys to your evil plans!

Sora: Holy ****, Chris is acting parental. (comes out of the restroom and pulls out a will) Now Wesker I will need you to sign this to insure that Hoshi, Chu, and LDLR are the godmothers in case anything were to happen to you or Chris.

Chris: Oh man, we have yaoi fangirls asking to be the godmothers of our kids.

Wesker: As much as I don't like it, I have to sign it. (signs the will insuring that Hoshi, Chu, and LDLR are the godmothers.) There done.

Sora: Great now to Leon's dare..... wait a f***ing minute why the hell would Leon want to marry William when he's happily married to Annette and has a 12 year old girl?!

William: I don't want to marry Leon, I love Annette!

Leon: I don't want to marry a man, I prefer women. Crazy yaoi loving fangirls (mutters angrily)

Joshua: As much as it pains almost everyone here it has to happen (gets a marriage certificate) Now William, Leon, you two need to sign this in order to make it official.

William: Fine, but after this I want an immediate divorce and be remarried to my beloved Annette.

Sora: Agreed!

Leon and William: (sign the marriage certificate and now officially a couple)

Joshua: We have more dares from LDLR,

_Ello!! Chu isn't here for now cause of her work from another fic LOL so here  
are my dares I dare chris to really and truely fall in love with wesker and  
then when you are about to get married your  
Must wear a dress to show you are the uke in the relationship and then you  
must shave off the stuble and become effeminate!! Ok next is wesker I want you to also fall in love with chris and then  
you must play cantarella from vocaloid LOL on your violin and that's all and  
no one can object the marriage and all the girls must make out with other  
girls and then I give this bento made by chu to josh ok byes! Oh ya sora I  
give you lots of weapons from the known everything and I will let you borrow  
My voodoo dolls that can control people and the force necklace it controls  
people to the point where they have to be killed and it only works for me you  
josh and hoshi for now k!_

Sora: See ya later. (begins to walk away)

Joshua: Sora, where are you going?

Sora: Out to get some fresh air and away from all this yaoi! Call me up when the yaoi is over for this chapter! (Slams the door to the studio shut and every RE Character is quiet)

Alyssa: Wow she is really pissed off.

Joshua: Sora will get over it, she just doesn't like it when characters are paired up with their anti-thesis.... especially when they're the same gender.

Billy: She should get over it but get back to the dares, the sooner they're over the sooner we'll have both of our hosts back.

Joshua: You got that right now Chris as much as you'll hate this but you have to truely fall in love with Wesker and when you're about to get married you have to wear a wedding dress, shave off the stubble and become effeminate.

Chris: Great, just great (finds a razor and shaving cream then goes to the restrooms to shave off the stubble)

Rebecca: I got the wedding dress (came out with a immaculate white dress) I found it in a closet backstage.

Joshua: I was always wondering how there were clothes in this studio, ohh well, let's just hope it fits Chris, wearing a wedding dress definitely requires the wearer either not to breath or regulate their breathing. (every RE character except Chris stares at Joshua) What? When I was human I was the ring bearer in my aunt's wedding and she complained about how tight the dress was and how she could barely breath in it.

All RE Characters except Chris: Ohh.

Chris: Kay all stubble is gone, where's the dress?

Jill: Here it is (hands Chris the dress regretfully)

Chris: Thanks Jill (Once again goes away to change into the wedding dress)

Joshua: Remember people no one can object, no matter how much you want to.

Chris: (comes out in the wedding dress which surprisingly fits) I'm ready for our wedding Albert!

Wesker: (sighs then finds the violin he used in the idiot olympics and plays cantarella from vocaloid to finish off his dare and under some mysterious power, falls in love with Chris)

Zombie Pastor: Now we are gathered here today to celebrate the union of Christopher Redfield and Albert Wesker, now if anyone thinks these two should not be wed speak now or forever hold your peace.

(No one speaks since its part of the dare that no one objects)

Zombie Pastor: Chris Redfield do you take Albert Wesker as your lawful wedded husband, in sickness and in heath till death do you part?

Chris: I do

Zombie Pastor: And do you Albert Wesker take Chris Redfield to be your lawful wedded wife in sickness and in health till death do you part?

Wesker: I do

Zombie Pastor: By the power invested in me, I now pronounce you two husband and wife.

Everyone except Sora: (weakly applauding at the marriage)

Joshua: You can get out of here pastor.

Zombie Pastor: Thanks, call me when you need another marriage ceremony

Joshua: alrighty, now this next dare is just as disturbing as the last.

Cindy: What is it?

Joshua: All girls have to makeout with other girls, you know yuri?

All Girls of RE: WHAT?!

Barry: Come on girls you heard the man, or licker?

Rebecca: I am so not going to like this!

Jill: Likewise here Becca.

Joshua: Get to it girls!

All Girls of RE: FINE!!!! (starts making out with one another until all girls had been kissed and accounted for)

Joshua: Thanks for the bento Chu (eats it the best he can) damn this is some great stuff, you're an excellent cook Chu! And I'll be sure to give Sora the weapons when she gets back. (takes out a cell phone and texts Sora that it's okay to come back)

Sora: FINALLY!!!! (Walks back in the studio with a new leather jacket, two Lightning Hawks at her waist and steel-toed combat boots)

Joshua: What'd you do while you were out?

Sora: I let out some steam, went to the shooting range, then hit the clothing store to pick up my leather jacket, and got my dual Lightning Hawks modified. What'd I miss?

Jill: Well Chris and Wesker got married, all us girls had to make out with one another so basically it was a yaoi and yuri moment here.

Sora: Thank god I wasn't here for that. But now onto our last dares from Black Dragon41.

_I Dare Wesker to write a love poem to all of us fangirls, and he must read it  
aloud. XJ (Wesker Fangirl!)_

_I Dare Chris to apologize to Wesker for killing him in Africa, and yes he has  
to!_

_I dare Leon to wear a pink T-shirt, that say's I love fangirls. Hilarious!_

_I Dare Rebecca to admit she loves Billy, I know she dose. In Resident Evil  
Zero they should of kissed, but never did. :(_

_Great DARE's but I am waiting for more R.E. characters, please continue the  
torment of the guests and please use my Dares. Good Work and Thankyou!_

Wesker: I have to what now?

Joshua: you know what you have to do, you must write a love poem to all your fangirls who are convienently in the fanpit (points to a giant pit filled with fangirls)

Wesker: Why?

Sora: Because its romantic and its a dare! (Drags Wesker to the fangirl pit and pushes him in) Girls don't attack him he has a poem for all of you!

Fangirl #1: OMG our hansome Albert has a poem for us?!

Fangirl #2: Pinch me I'm dreaming! (gets pinched by Sora) ow, I didn't mean that literally!

Sora: Sorry (joins the fangirls)

Wesker: Sora.... what are you doing in here?

Sora: Depending on my mood I can be either a Leon fangirl or a Wesker fangirl and right now I'm a Wesker fangirl! (took off her leather jacket to reveal a "I Heart Wesker" t-shirt)

Wesker: Damn, and here I thought you were a normal person.

Sora: shut it Wesker and read us your poem.

(Both Sora and all fangirls look at Wesker anxiously)

Wesker: "Into my world  
of darkness and silence,  
you brought light and music.

When you lit my candle,  
I began to see and understand  
the taste and texture of love.

For the first time."

All Wesker fangirls including Sora: That was so romantic!! (pounces Wesker, but Sora got out of the fanpit to avoid getting crushed by fangirls in the process of death glomping Wesker)

Sora: Now that's taken care of Chris time for that apology to Wesker for killing him in Africa, even though I don't think he truely died in Africa Wesker's way to awesome to die by two rockets!

Chris: Sora! Do you realize that you may have jinxed all of us if Wesker does end up returning!

Sora: Yes and I don't care!

Wesker: (Finally got away from his fangirls with most of his clothes in tact surprisingly but lost his sunglasses once again) How many times must I lose my sunglasses before those fangirls get bored of taking them (somehow pull out another pair and places them back on his face.)

Joshua: The fangirls will never tire of taking your glasses but now Chris apologize to Wesker please.

Chris: Alright, as much as I hate to do this, Wesker, I'm sorry for killing you in Africa, even though you deserve it since you tried to spread Uroboros across the globe.

Sora and Wesker fangirls: CHRISTOPHER REDFIELD!!!!

Chris: Other than that I'm sorry.

Wesker: That sounded almost sincere care to do it again?

Chris: No, the dare was to get me to apologize once and that was it.... I want a divorce (remembering the marriage)

Wesker: I was already five steps ahead of you by calling a divorce attorney for both me and William

Leon and William: THANK YOU!!!

Sora: That reminds me..... (walks away then comes back with her infinite flamethrower and torches the marriage certificate Leon and William signed) There all gone, now William get back together with Annette and Leon, please continue to be your hot self.

Leon: I... will.... (mildly disturbed)

William: Annette baby I'm coming back for you!! (runs off with Annette to renew their wedding vows.)

Sora: ohh and Leon before I forget, here's a gift for you its part of your dare. (hands Leon a white box)

Leon: (opens it to find a pink t-shirt that says "I Love Fangirls" on it) Let me guess I have to wear it?

Sora: Yep its your dare.

Leon: I don't see the problem with that (takes off the black shirt he was wearing and puts on the pink t-shirt)

Ada: You have no idea what you have done, Leon

Leon Fangirls: LEON!!!! (somehow escapes the fanpit and death glomps Leon while Sora is trying to pry them off)

Joshua: Now for the last dare, Rebecca time to confess your love to Billy Coen, you know you want to its been obvious you were in love with him from the very start. And what was with the ending why didn't you kiss him, I mean it was respectful to salute him cause he's an ex-leutenant but why?!

Rebecca: I admit it I love Billy but I didn't have the courage to kiss him so to show Billy that I respect him I saluted him.

Sora: Basically you're saying you love Billy but chickened out when deciding to kiss him?

Rebecca: Yes

Billy: I figured as much Becca, and so you know I love you too. (pulls Rebecca to him and makes out with her)

Joshua: Wow did't see that coming.

Sora: I did, now we have a couple! That just about wraps up this chapter but our zombie dance team looks starved, Joshua, you may want to get up on the ceiling.

Joshua: Sora you better not be doing what I think you're doing.

Sora: (whispers to Joshua) I'm letting the dance team out to enjoy their feast of RE characters.

Joshua: Fine (grabs Sora and climbs on the ceiling once Sora let out the zombie dance team and took away any weaponry any of the characters may have had.)

All RE Characters: AHHH!!!! (Gets eaten alive by the zombie dance team)

Sora: Well that ends this chapter, hope you liked it and send in your reviews. Also you can dare **ANY** RE Character you want! See ya!


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil or it's characters Capcom does, all I own is Sora and Joshua**

Joshua: (Revives everyone from the last chapter who gotten eaten by the zombie dance team) Congratulation everyone, we have more dares! (Looks at Sora)

Sora: What? (eating a pie)

Joshua: Sora, you should control your tyraids, you upset LDLR. And that pie is a peace offering from Moonya!

Sora: Well the peace offering is accepted, oh god this pie is delicious (continues eating a slice then looks at Joshua) Want a piece? (has a slice of pie on a plate and holds it out to Joshua)

Joshua: Sure, I would love some (takes the plate and starts eating it) Damn this is some good pie!

Cindy: Uhh, shouldn't you like announce the dares so who ever gotten dared can do them.

Sora: You're right Cindy (swallows the piece of pie she had in her mouth and got out the dare from LDLR) Here's LDLR's dare

_Moonya:YOU IDIOTS HOW CAN YOU DO THAT  
Me&Chu:WE ARE SORRY!!  
Moonya:*Glares*  
Me:Ok Ok! Miss brittany, me and chu are sorry on what we have done so sorry  
agian so know you can change evrything In the last dare so sorry agian!  
Says sorry 200 times  
Moonya:*sighs* sorry for my dork of a creator and friend here they got to  
pumped up becuase they are fans of yaoi so the marriage for leon is off and  
such and the other thing I  
made ya some pie ok for a peace offering I'm so sorry again but I zoo have  
one dare I dare chris to fight A ghost that's all give him any weapons again  
sorry for the what happened because of this dorks and such so bye_

Chris: It's not possible to fight a ghost! No weapon can hurt one and for one ghosts don't exist

Ghost: So says you. (appeared behind Chris)

Chris: (faints)

Sora: Wimp, ohh and LDLR, I'm the one who should be sorry, I should've had more self control so I hope there are no hard feelings and to show my apology here's a cake as a peace offering from me to you (gives LDLR the cake) Now back to the dare...... Chris WAKE UP!!!! (kicks Chris in the happy place)

Chris: F***!!!!!! (rolls on the ground in pain)

Joshua: Ugg such profanities, Redfield get up and fight the ghost, choose your weapon. (Points to a wall covered in weaponry)

Chris: Oh my God. (looks at the wall but then notices the butterknife from the last chapter) why is the butterknife on the wall?

Sora: 'Cause it's a powerful weapon against zombie dragons! But harmless to humans.

Jill: That clears things up, Chris why don't you choose the cross? (points to a wooden cross)

Chris: Why is that on the wall?

Joshua: CHOOSE YOUR WEAPON NOW!!!!

Chris: Fine, (looks at the wall and chooses a grenade launcher with flame rounds)

Sora: Let the fight commence!

Ghost: Chris, I'm disappointed in you. Everyone knows that a ghost can't be killed by normal means.... now DIE!! (possesses Chris and controls him to shoot himself with the flame rounds which caused Chris' body to explode into a million little chunks from the blast.) I win, now I bid you Au revoir. (disappears)

Sora: I'm really disappointed in you Chris, you should always take the cross, but no you had to take the grenade launder. (revives Chris)

Chris: What happened?

Rebecca: Umm you got possessed by a ghost and killed yourself.

Chris: How wonderful (being sarcastic then sees Stew the zombie janitor cleaning the blood off the floor and walls)

Joshua: Onto the next dare from Black Dragon41

_Black Dragon41 here again!_

XD XD XD XD XD XD

I Dare Alfred to smack ~Alexia~! (OMG! Is that possible?)

I Dare Karuser to admit that he is a big whimp, and considers himself an  
underling to everyone. (including fangirls)

I Dare Wesker to rule the world for 45 seconds.

I Dare Chris act like Wesker. (Accessories and attitude included!) XJ X) X3  
XD

Alfred: NO! I can't hit my dear Alexia, I just can't (chickening out)

Sora: Oh my lord, Alfred do you dare or else I'm burning you to hell then bring you back to suffer again.

Alexia: Alfred, don't you even dare (transformed into her mutated form)

Sora: For the record Alexia, you are awesome, you totally kick butt!

Alexia: Thank you. (turns back to her twin brother) Alfred if you.......(got smacked by her own brother)

Sora: Ohhhh, someone's dead now! Never smack Alexia if you don't want to die.

Alexia: To hell with you (splatters her blood on Alfred and watched as he burned to death then transforms back to normal)

Krauser: Now that's a sight to see (laughs at Alfred's death)

Joshua: Don't laugh now, you have to admit that your a big wimp and consider yourself an underling to everyone including the fangirls.

Krauser: WHAT?! I am not a wimp or considering myself as an underling.

Sora: You have to it's your dare.

Krauser: I wouldn't do it if my life depended on it.

Sora and Joshua: Jack, Jack, Jack, you should know better by now (brings out weapons of torture)

Krauser: What are you two doing? (backing away slowly)

Joshua: What's the matter Jack, You scared of a girl and a super intellegent Licker?

Krauser: No

Sora: Then why back away, we have a deal for you, if you do your dare me and Joshua will not harm you in any way.

Krauser: What will happen if I don't accept the deal?

Joshua: Very bad things will happen to you, the most unspeakable things ever made will happen to you.

Krauser: Fine I'll do it

Sora: Perfect.

Krauser: Listen up everyone I have something to announce! (Sees all RE characters, fangirls, and Stew the zombie janitor looking at him) I am a wimp and I consider myself an underling to all of you.

Everyone in the Studio: (Laughing at Krauser for what he just said)

Joshua: Now for Wesker's dare.

Wesker: Ohh god what it is now?

Sora: You're dared to rule the world for 45 seconds! Won't that be great!

All RE Characters except Wesker and Excella: NO!!

Sora: Too bad, now Wesker, have fun being the ruler of the world for 45 seconds!

Wesker: Gladly (leaves the studio and rules the world)

(The TV turns on the new channel and the there's a news woman looking frantic and there mass destruction behind her)

TV news woman: As you can see behind me Albert Wesker has reigned supreme over the entire world using the Uroboros virus created in Africa to bring out his chosen survivors while millions of people are being turned into rejected Uroboros infectees...... wait something has happened Wesker is leaving and everyone is turning back to normal what is happening here? (TV get turned off by Joshua)

Joshua: That was the longest 45 seconds of my life.

Sora: You got that right, (hears Wesker coming back in the studio) hey Wezzy, how was ruling the world.

Wesker: Even though it was for 45 seconds it still was better than I imagined.

Sora: Good to know you liked your 45 seconds of world domination but now its time for Chris to be Wesker's twin!

Chris and Wesker: WHAT?!

Jill: Basically Chris has to dress up like Wesker and have the attitude?

Sora: Exactamundo! (holds out what looks like Wesker's black leather combat clothes with gloves, boots, and glasses included) Time to get dress Chris.

Chris: Why me? (Takes the clothes and heads to a changing room then comes back out looking almost identical to Wesker if it wasn't for his brown hair)

Claire: Oh my god, Chris you could be Wesker's sibling if you dyed your hair blonde and had those snake-like eyes he has.

Wesker: I hate to admit it but Ms. Redfield has a point.

Chris: I'm sorry Wesker but I believe that my dear sister Claire's point only concerns out physical traits, you are obviously my superior when it comes to being a superhuman along with honing intelligence in the most difficult of majors (slicked back his hair and put his shades on)

Jill: Oh no, Chris really has turned into Wesker, turn him back to normal you crazy son of a ** (grabbing Wesker by the colar of his trench coat)

Wesker: I have nothing to do with Chris' transformation, dear Jillian (prying her hands off his coat)

Joshua: Okay before we have more bloodshed we have more dares (going through the dares they recieved,) ahh here's one from Christian-Ann-Redfield_  
_

_i dare wesker to make out with claire 200 times in front of chris_

i dare chris to say "I'm an idiot who likes ponys and little doll houses

i dare leon to try make out with claire while claire is making out with  
wesker.

Wesker: This will probably be quite disturbing. (looking at Claire)

Claire: I have to make out with my brother's nemesis 200 times.... in front of him too!

Chris: Wesker don't you dare make out with my sister! (gotten out of the Wesker persona and started to get pissed off)

Wesker: It's part of the dare Chris (pulls Claire to him and makes out with her while Chris is shocked to watch)

(During Claire's and Wesker's make out dare at around the 159 make out, Leon tried to make out with Claire but only succeeded in getting a death glare from Wesker)

Leon: Hey I have to do my dare too!

Wesker: Then I suggest you wait till my dare is over with.

Leon: My dare specifically stated that I had to try to make out with Claire while she's making out with you.

Sora: This requires some help (whispers to Joshua). Hey Wesker, I just got a call from Spencer and he said that he is bringing back Umbrella.

Wesker: What?! Not after what I had to do to bring it down! (quickly finished his second to last kiss with Claire and searches the studio for Spencer)

Joshua: Leon hurry up before Wesker catches wind of what your going to do.

Leon: Thanks (Makes out with Claire and backed away from her when Wesker returned with bloody gloves and coat)

Sora: Where was Spencer?

Wesker: Hiding in the bathroom but now to finish my dare (Kisses Claire for the final time and walkes away)

Chris: That was disturbing and do I really have to say that I'm an idiot who likes ponies and little doll houses?

Joshua: Yes you do but you already said it.

Chris: What?! (hears some people snickering at what Chris had just said)

Sora: Yeah, isn't total humiliation grand? But now here are dares from Tyrant Wolf

_wow what a intresting chapter..._

wesker: I dare you to fight cerberus (the hounds of hell not the zombie  
dobermans) with nothing but a butcher knife cause cerberus is way worse than  
any zombified dragon, choose wisley wesker to skip this dare or not, I could  
have more embaressing things in the future...but I could make you a deal...you  
can skip out on this dare without useing your skip card BUT you have to let me  
train one of your sons to be your heir, my name isn't just a name albert, it's  
what I really am and I could train your son to be the best Dam heir there is,  
and I'll tell you a little secret...(I am a wolf demon) *chuckles evily*

chris: ah the love of torturing you, I dare you to sing "i'm a barbygirl"  
while wearing a blond wig with a pink bow.

alfred: I KNOW YOU'V BEEN HIDEING FROM ME! YOU LITTLE GAY B*STARD! i dare you  
to admit that you have playgirl magizenes in your room ADMIT IT I KNOW YOU DO!  
ALFRED!

alexia: hello alexia since your one of fave RE charictars i'm gonna go easy  
on you I dare you to light the people you hate most on fire

barry, steve, hunk: I dare you guys to play EXTREME tennis with brian, peter,  
and stewie from family guy (and you will be useing fire balls for tennis  
balls)

salazar: and last but not least salazar I now youv been hiding from me to YOU  
LITTLE MIDGET IN A PIRATE SUIT! i dare you to try to reach the cheezits on the  
highest shelf in the studio WITHOUT help

Sora: Tyrant Wolf how'd you know I had cheezits?

Joshua: You have cheezits?

Sora: Yeah its a substitution for the candy which you refuse to let me have!

Joshua: Oookay (looks to Wesker who was trying to decide what to do) Wesker, you can either fight Cerberus, use your skip card, or agree to the terms of Tyrant Wolf's deal.

Wesker: Damn, I could fight the hounds of hell with a butcher's knife but end up getting killed, I could use my pass but risk doing something humiliating for her next dares, or I could allow a wolf demon to train one of my sons to be my heir......... alright I made my choice, Tyrant Wolf you can train my youngest son, Alex, he has so much potential, Allen doesn't even compare to him.

Allen: DAD!!

Alex: YES!! I get to be dad's heir.

Chris: Wait! Since when do you make decisions for our sons.

Wesker: Since I got full custody of them during our divorce.

Chris: WHAT?!

Tyrant Wolf: I knew you would make the right decision Albert, come with me Alex your training shall begin. (appears then takes Alex with her to start his training)

Allen: I lost my brother (goes to his aunt Claire and complains how Wesker favors Alex more than him)

Sora: okay since Wesker had taken the deal from Tyrant Wolf Wesker still has his skip card and now Chris you have to sing "Barbie Girl" while wearing a blonde wig with a pink bow.

Chris: Damn you.

Sora: Don't blame me, I just announce the dares (puts the blonde wig on Chris) Now start singing!

Chris: "I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic  
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation

Come on, Barbie, let's go party

I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic  
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation

I'm a blonde single girl in the fantasy world  
Dress me up, take your time, I'm your dollie  
You're my doll, rock and roll, feel the glamour and pain  
Kiss me here, touch me there, hanky-panky

You can touch, you can play  
You can say I'm always yours, oooh whoa

I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic  
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation

Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah  
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh  
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah  
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh

Make me walk, make me talk, do whatever you please  
I can act like a star, I can beg on my knees  
Come jump in, be my friend, let us do it again  
Hit the town, fool around, let's go party

You can touch, you can play  
You can say I'm always yours  
You can touch, you can play  
You can say I'm always yours

Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah  
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh  
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah  
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh

I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic  
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation

I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world  
Life in plastic, it's fantastic  
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere  
Imagination, life is your creation

Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah  
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh  
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah  
Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh"

Alfred: Tyrant Wolf I am not gay, and I don't own any playgirl magazines.

Sora: Then that means you are gay! EEK gay guy (hides behind Joshua)

Alfred: I AM NOT GAY!! Just because I don't own playgirl magazines doesn't mean I'm gay!

Joshua: Alfred, you have a creepish laugh that even makes my skin crawl, you wear your sister's dress, make-up, and wear a blonde wig. That kind of adds up to the fact that you're either gay or suffering a split personality disorder from Alexia being asleep for 15 years.

Alfred: I don't have a split personality nor am I gay!

Sora: Forget it Joshua, he won't admit he's gay or has playgirl magazines.

Alfred: Thank you!

Joshua: Alexia, since you're one of Tyrant Wolf's faves you can light anyone you hate on fire.

Alexia: With pleasure (transforms and lights, Alexander/Noferatu, Wesker, Claire, and Chris on fire. Then tranforms back to normal)

Sora: Wow it is true, you are sadistic (Alexia looks at her) Not that there's nothing wrong with being a sadist. (backing away from Alexia and revives everyone Alexia burned) Alright Steve, Barry, and HUNK, you three are dared to play EXTREME tennis with Brian, Peter, and Stewie from Family Guy and for tennis balls, fire balls will be the replacement.

Barry, Steve, and HUNK: WHAT!?

Joshua: You heard the girl, go to the tennis court to meet your opposing team (Sends the three RE Characters to play against the Family Guy team)

Sora: While the boys are away, Salazar, I'm afraid you're going to have to get my cheezits from where I put them without help.

Salazar: Where are they?

Sora: (points up to a steel I-beam with a box of cheezits on the I-beam which is almost 10-15 feet in the air)

Salazar: Huh? (looks up to see the orange box above him and his mouth gaps open)

Joshua: Uhh, Sora, how did you get those cheezits up there and why are they up there?

Sora: I can't tell you how I got them up there but the reason why is because I wanted a challenge to get my snacks.

Joshua: You're going to the psychiatrist when this chapter is done to test you for insanity.

Sora: You know there's a fine line between genius and insanity, I never crossed it.... I've been on the insane side for quite some time.

All RE characters in the studio: (backs away from Sora slowly)

Joshua: That does it your definitely going to the shrink.

Salazar: Good maybe she'll be somewhat decent when she gets back (stacks up boxes up to the I-beam with the cheezits) I'm out of boxes!

Saddler: Use the chairs and TV.

Krauser: Like that'll help the midget.

// an hour later //

Salazar: I almost got it! (on his tip toes and so close to reaching the I-beam until the studio door slams open and closed) NO! (starts to lose his balance)

Claire: Steve, who won the tennis match?

Steve: Those F***ing Family Guy characters, HUNK stunk at playing tennis, Barry was our only good player and I kept getting burned by the fireballs.

HUNK: I can't help that I never learned how to play tennis.

Barry: But we were close to winning if the kid hadn't mooned us and cussed at us throughout the second half of the game.

Steve: (sees Salazar trying to regain his balance) Umm is that a pirate suit wearing midget on a tower of boxes, chairs, and TVs?

Claire: Yes, that's Ramon Salazar, he was dared to get a box of cheezits where ever they were and it turns out Sora had a box on an I-beam about 10-15 feet above us.

Barry: Why is there a box of cheezits on an I-beam?

Chris: It's a long story Barry, but it involves Sora being insane.

Barry: Okay that explains it.

Salazar: This time I almost got it (his fingertips managed to touch the I-beam)

Sora: Sweet I've been looking for the remote ever since we set up the truth or dare fic in here! (pulls out the TV remote out from under a chain which was part of the support causing Salazar's tower to tumble down)

Salazar: NO!!!!!! (crying face down on the floor)

Joshua: Well now umm, this dare is from Zombiegirl2007

_hum i dare Lisa Trevor to Make Out out with Brad Vickers also dare Ashely to  
save leon. Jill make out with Nemesis, Sora make out with josh. Also dare  
wesker to apologize to the Entire Stars Team and he has to keep doing it  
until they forgive them. Alfred Has To Not wear his sister's dress for a week._

Brad: Wait a minute isn't Lisa Trevor that mutated girl with two faces.

Sora: the second face she has is another's woman's face that looks like her mother so suck it up and kiss the poor girl.

Lisa Trevor: (moans and pulls Brad to her and makes out with him)

Ashley: What am I supposed to save Leon from?

Joshua: He's suspended from an I-beam over the Leon fangirl pit and you only have a few minutes to save him.

Ashley and Sora: What?! I'm coming Leon!

Joshua: Sora, this is Ashley's dare and your dare is to kiss yours truely.

Sora: You're going to milk this for all it's worth aren't you?

Joshua: What make you say that?

Sora: Paranoia, ohh and Jill you have to make out with Nemesis, Wesker you must apologize to the entire STARS team until they forgive you and Alfred you can't wear your sister's dress for a week.

Jill: Okay, umm Nemesis isn't here.

Joshua: Yes he is, he's behind you (Points to Nemesis who is behind Jill, and pulled Sora to him) time to do your dare Sora.

Sora: Fine (Makes out with Joshua while Jill reluctantly makes out with Nemesis)

(After the make out session was done Jill ran to the bathroom while Sora was scrubbing her lips with soap to insure she wouldn't get infected with the T-virus)

Ashley: I managed to save Leon from being attacked by his fangirls (unties Leon and hugs him)

Sora: Keep your hands off Leon! (Came out of the bathroom just in time to see Ashley hugging Leon)

Wesker: As much as I don't want to do this, everyone from STARS I'm sorry for luring all of you into that death trap of a mansion, I was under orders to collect combat data from the T-001 by making you fight against it and for that I'm sorry.

STARS Members: Like we're going to forgive you Wesker

Wesker: you do realized that I have to keep apologizing to you until you forgive me.

Barry: Then keep on apologizing.

Alfred: I can go a week without wearing Alexia's dress, it won't bother me.

// a week later //

Alfred: (in a corner in the feedle position) Alexia isn't here, she's asleep in Antartica, I can't see or speak to her, she's not here.

Alexia: Alfred I'm right here you idiot (standing right next to him)

Alfred: She's not here, I miss my sister. (totally oblivious to Alexia standing right next to him)

Wesker: I am truely, deeply sorry for what I......

STARS Members: THAT'S ENOUGH WE FORGIVE YOU!!!!!!!!

Wesker: Finally I can stop apologizing.

Sora: Last but not least the dare from Shadownip

_i dare Claire to kiss Wesker and they both have to like it!_

Claire: I have to kiss Wesker again!

Wesker: But this time we have to like it.

Chris: Have some mercy on them.

Joshua: Be quiet Chris, just be glad that you don't have to watch.

Chris: I'm not going to let that psychopath kiss my sister again.

Sora: (wields her infinite flamethrower) Let the two commence with their dare or be prepared to be charred.

Chris: I'm going to go see if Jill is okay from making out with Nemesis (goes to where ever Jill is at)

Claire: I guess we have to go through this once again.

Wesker: Yes we do.

Claire: (makes out with Wesker for over 30 minutes and it finally ended) Did anyone ever tell you that you're a good kisser?

Wesker: No, your the first one to tell me that.

Sora: Ohh I think we may have another couple.

Wesker and Claire: No you don't! (looked at eachother then walked to opposite sides of the studio)

Joshua: Well that wraps up chapter 5, we appreciate your reviews, and please continue to send in more dares. Now Sora take us out.

Sora: For this chapter our Zombie Dance Team is going to dance the "Hara Hara Yukai" from Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu

Zombie Dance Team: (Starts dancing the Hara Hara Yukai with the music playing once the spotlight shines on the stage)


	6. Yet another long chapter

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil Capcom does and I don't own the characters from Family Guy, all I own is Sora and Joshua.**

Joshua: We're back from the shrink and we have dares.

Chris: Please say that the shrink cured Sora from her insanity.

Joshua: Surprisingly the shrink found nothing wrong with her.

Sora: I kept telling you that there was nothing wrong, I was acting the entire time.

Joshua: You should've let me in on the act!

Sora: But that would've taken away a key component that is required for the characters to freak out thinking that one of their hosts is really insane.

Wesker: So basically you were pretending to be temorarily insane only to get a rise from us?

Sora: Exactly but now lets get on with the dares! These dares are from Black Dragon41

_I Dare The Merchant to sell everything in his inventory for a dollar,  
EVERYTHING! (Would really help in R.E 4)_

I Dare Chris to to kick Carlos's **! (ChrisXJill fan)

I Dare Claire to go goth.

I Dare Wesker to give a hug to all of the fangirls in the fangirls pit.

Merchant: This is not going to be easy. (looking at all his merchandise)

Sora: It's never easy selling high quality weaponry for an extremely low price such as one dollar. But for starters I would like the Semi-auto rifle with the scope and a Blacktail.

Joshua: Why do you need those when you have two perfectly good Lightning Hawks at your waist.

Sora: Its for my collection (recieves the guns and scope from the merchant.)

Merchant: That'll.... be... three...dollars

Sora: (hands over $3) Thank you now I will take this back to my wall, Chris you get to kick Carlos' ** (leaves to stash away her newly perchased weapons)

Chris: This ought to be fun.

Carlos: Wait Chris can we work this out? Please, Chris can't we work out a deal?

Chris: No! (starts beating up Carlos to what seems like a bloody pulp)

Joshua: Claire you were dared to go goth.

Claire: WHAT?

Sora: Go goth, you know wear all black, dye your hair black, wear dark make-up the whole enchalada.

Claire: Damn, (goes to the back room and gets changed into her goth attire)

Chris: Carlos is beaten up (notices Claire's gone) Where's my sister?

Joshua: Turning goth

Chris: What?!

Claire: Hey bro (comes out in the open wearing all black attire)

Any RE Character who knows Claire: Oh my god

Wesker: Why do I have a feeling that I'm going to hate my dare.

Sora: You have to hug each and every single one of your fangirls.... sweet then that means you have to hug me too since I'm your fangirl as well.

Wesker: Technically my dare was to hug all my fangirls in the fanpit and last time I checked your not apart of the fanpit.

Sora: Thanks for nothing (smacks Wesker upside the head, steals his glasses and walked away)

Wesker: That could've gone better

Joshua: Wesker I've already alerted the girls about your dare so they won't death glomp you on sight and I have a camera to make sure that you huge **ALL** your fangirls. (holding a portable mini camera and then pushed Wesker to all his fangirls in the fanpit)

All Wesker Fangirls: (Eagerly waiting for their hug from Wesker)

Wesker: This is going to be a long dare (startes hugging his fangirls)

// several hours later (it's a huge fanpit) //

Joshua: That's the last of them you can come back up now! (turns off the camera and walks away)

Wesker: Great (was about to jump out until the fangirls glomped him) Get off of me!!!

Sora: Now while Wesker is being attacked by his fangirls our next dares are from Zombiegirl2007

_that was great hum I dare Sora to Share her her favorite Snack with Salazar.  
I dare Krauser and Leon they have to be best friends for the remanding chapter  
next chapter and were matching Clothes. I dare Ada to Confess her love to  
Leon. I dare brad to go through mansion experience by himself using only his  
self help books payback a ** its it no wonder why jill just watch you get  
killed by will go through each of Stars team members death 50  
times in a role the alpogies thing wasnt enough . William and Annette need to  
apologize to sherry for being terrible parents and they have to take her to  
Disneyland.I Brian Irons to give your money to charity all of it. I dare  
Ricardo to admit he gay and make out with Alfred. Im am very evil more dares  
to come_.

Sora: (Comes back trying to open a cup of M&Ms) Can someone help me with this, M&Ms are my favorite snack!

Joshua: Let me get them open (tries to open the m&ms but fails) damn this thing is shut tight, someone else care to give it a whirl.

Chris: Hand it over (takes the cup from Joshua, tried to open it but can't)

Wesker: Chris, hand me the cup. (managed to get out of the fanpit with torn shirt, pants, and his hair is messed up)

Chris: Here take it (hands the cup to Wesker)

Wesker: (takes the cup and tries to open it but surprisingly he can't) What the hell?! (continues to try to open the cup but only succees in getting pissed off) Sora, did you glue this shut?

Sora: NO! But put it down I have an quick and easy solution for this dilema.

Everyone in the studio: (looks at eachother then back to Sora) What is it?

Sora: (wields an axe and does a crazed battle cry)

Joshua: Sora put the axe down!

Sherry: umm, may I try to open it?

Wesker: Sure Sherry, though I doubt you'll..... (sees Sherry pop the lid off like it was nothing)

Everyone that tried to open the m&m cup: I LOOSENED IT!!!!!

Sora: Thank you Sherry, (puts the axe down) may I have my snack now?

Sherry: Here you go (hands over the m&ms)

Sora: Thank..... Salazar time to eat some m&ms with me, my dare was to share my favorite snack with you.

Salazar: But I thought that you said that you couldn't have candy?

Sora: No it's just that when I have too much I tend to get a little loopy (starts eating the m&ms)

Salazar: Okay (takes some m&ms and eats them with Sora)

Krauser: Guess what comrade, we have to be best buds for the remainder of the chapter and wear matching clothes for the next.

Leon: This ought to be interesting.

Krauser: and to celebrate our friendship lets go have ourselves from beer.

Sora: There's absolutely NO drinking in my fic, have some sparkling cider to celebrate. (hands over red and white cider)

Krauser: Killjoy (takes some white sparkling cider and pours it in two beer mugs)

Sora: I hate you.

Krauser: Get in line. (takes his mug filled to the brim with white cider and chugs it while Leon drank some of his cider)

Ada: Leon, I must confess that I've been in love with you ever since we met in Raccoon but because of my assignment I couldn't tell you.

Leon: But didn't you have a boyfriend at the time.

Ada: John? I was just using him to get information about what experiments Umbrella was conducting.

Joshua: wow talk about deception, Brad or otherwise known as "Chicken Heart" you have to go through the whole mansion incident by yourself using only your self-help books.

Brad: What? Why?

Sora: Payback, when Alpha team was in trouble you should've evactuated them immediately not fly right passed them to leave them to escavate the mansion full of zombie, hunters, Lisa Trevor, Crimson Heads, Cerberi, crows, bees, spiders, Chimeras, and sharks!

Brad: oh god help me.

Sora: You're going to need his help alright now get to the mansion now! (sends Brad to the mansion with her authoress powers)

// several hours later //

(An explosion was heard in the distance and Brad comes back to the studio looking torn up and charred)

Joshua: How was the incident again?

Brad: STARS Alpha team I am really sorry for abandoning you back there, now I know what you've been through. I'm going to go lie down (walkes over to a double king sized bed in the far corner of the studio)

Sora: Brad NO!!!!

Brad: (plops down on the bed only to be torn apart by Lickers who were sleeping under the covers)

William: Sora, why was there a double king sized bed full of lickers in here?

Sora: Dunno, I ordered the bed but when I got it the delivery guy said that the bed came with the Lickers that attacked the truck and taken a liking to the bed so I took the bed anyway and kept the cute little Lickers.

Claire, Leon, Chris, Sheva, Wesker, Jill, and Carlos: CUTE?! You think those creatures are cute?!

Sora: Yeah, Lickers are the most adorible creatures on earth.... next to huskies.

Wesker: That's kind of disturbing.

Sora: Shut it Wesker, you have to go through all the STARS members deaths 50 times each

Wesker: WHAT?!

Sora: You heard me, now do it.

Wesker: Damn it all.

// 300 deaths and revivals later //

Wesker: I did not expect to go through that many deaths, I think I managed to see death for a few seconds after getting eaten by Neptune.

Sora: Deal with it, Frost, Kenneth, and Brad dealt with it and now William, Annette, apologize to your daughter for being such bad parents, I mean come on, your jobs can't really be that time consuming!

Annette: Sherry, I'm soo sorry for not being there for you, I meant to but work get both me and your father away, I'm so sorry.

William: I'm also sorry sweetheart, both me and Annette love you very much and we shouldn't have let our work keep us apart, how about we spend some well needed family time together and go to Disneyland.

Sherry: YAY!! Let's go mom, dad.

Joshua: I already called up Disneyland and everything is paid for so you can enjoy your family time. (sends the Birkin family to Disneyland) Brian Irons, time to donate every single penny you have to charity!

Irons: What?! Why would I do that?

Sora: Because it's good for the soul and you spent most of your money on those tacky yet weirdly disturbing pieces of arts which costs thousands of dollars so start donating!

Irons: Who do I donate my money to?

Joshua: How about a children's hospital, the homeless, a children's orphanage, you know all that important stuff.

Irons: Fine (starts writing out checks to every that Joshua told him)

Richardo: Damn it, I thought I was hiding that fact well, how did Zombiegirl2007 know I was gay?

All RE Characters: You really are gay?!

Richardo: Yeah I am, now where's that hansome twin of Alexia's

Alfred: Stay away from me, I'm not gay! (Tries to run off but his path gotten blocked by the Lickers)

Sora: I trained the Lickers to not allow anyone to escape unless I allowed them to leave.

Richardo: Come to me my hansome Alfred (goes after Alfred and after some time Richardo catches him and makes out with him)

Sora: This is disturbing on so many levels but this is halarious to watch. Our next set of dares are from Christian-Ann-Redfield

_I'm back and I love your stories_

I dare Brad to do a silly dance at the public while wearing a chicken suit.

I dare leon to kiss chris

I dare wesker to ask claire out on a date and everyone in RE will spy on  
them. PS: they have to like each other willingly.  
And wesker there no using of skip card because it is a very easy dare I'm so  
sure you could do it, I know you're not a coward. That's why you and claire  
are my favorites. Hehehehehehe. Good Luck

Joshua: (revives Brad) Brad time to do a silly dance in a chicken suit in public

Brad: Do I have to?

Sora: Yes you must now pick a dance, get in the chicken suit and go out in public to do your dance!

Brad: Fine (puts on the chicken suit and goes out of the studio)

**// Out in the Town Square //**

Random Bystander: Is that someone in a chicken suit?

Random Child: Mommy why is that person a chicken?

Brad: (turns on a boom box playing the Macarena and starts dancing to it but scares some people off while others are laughing)

**// Back in the studio //**

Joshua: Poor Brad, but I do have to admit, most people would think that some stranger in a chicken suit would do the chicken dance but no Brad chose the Macarena.

Chris: Brad always did hate the chicken dance, it reminded him of his nickname.

Leon: My dare is to kiss Chris?!

Sora: That's right Leon, have fun and don't get poked to death from Chris' stubble

Chris: You approve of this?

Sora: No, it's that new medication I'm on

Joshua: What new medication?

Sora: You don't remember the shrink perscribing me that medication that makes me not care and occasionally a little sleepy.

Joshua: Ohh that medication, but uhh Chris, Leon get to kissing.

Leon: Great, now I have to kiss Claire older brother.

Chris: swallow your pride and let's get this over with.

Leon: Alright (Kisses Chris)

Wesker: Claire would you like to go on a date with me.

Claire: Sure I would love that, just let me fine some appropriate attire. (leaves the room and goes to the changing room to pick out something nice)

Sora: also Christian-Ann Redfield the skip card Wesker has is only valid for Tyrant Wolf's dares so it wouldn't do any good for anyone else's dares.

Claire: I'm ready, (comes out of the changing room wearing a beautiful black dress)

Wesker: Good, now lets go, I've already got reservations at "La Lune Symphonia"

Chris: Damn that's the most exquisite restaurant there is. How the hell did you get reservations there?

Wesker: Umm that would be calling ahead of time and asking for a table before anyone else. (being sarcastic)

Sora: Joshua, did he really make reservations there?

Joshua: I called up La Lune Symphonia and they said that they had Albert Wesker's table all set up, he really did call up to reserve a table.

Chris: But how? It's almost impossible to make reservations there.

Wesker: You just got to know when to call up, now lets get going Claire (exits the studio with Claire and all RE characters go to spy on them)

// Two hours later //

(Everyone comes back from the date and Wesker looks pissed off at the RE characters except for Claire.)

Sora: How was the date you two lovebirds (taking a drink of tea and munching on nacho cheese Doritos)

Claire: It was wonderful, I never knew La Lune Symphonia had a orchestra and the food was delicious, though it would've been a lot better if my brother and the rest of the RE people hadn't been spying on us.

RE Characters: We were dared to!

Sora: But you would expect Chris to spy on the date since your older brother Claire.

Claire: Your right.

Joshua: Here's the dare from otaku-miyuki

_I dare Chris to dye leon's hair black! MAKE SURE LEON'S HELD DOWN!_

Leon: What the hell, there's no way Chris is dying my hair black!

Joshua: Don't be so sure of that.

Leon: Why?

Joshua: (uses his licker tongue to trip Leon and Chris was able to grab Leon, restrain him, and started putting the black dye in his hair) Now that's settled we have dares from Akako Hama

_Sora: Did you forget that Hoshi LOVES yaoi? Also choose one male character to  
listen to the VERY detailed explanation of yaoi, she will have visual aids._

Chris: You have one of three choices on summoning the Tails Doll. 1; Beat  
Sonic R 100%, 2; tag Super Sonic as the Tails Doll, and 3; go in a bathroom,  
lock the door, shut off the lights and listen to Can You Feel The Sunshine  
from Sonic R. Then the Tails Doll, shall do one of five things, suck out your  
soul, use a knifr to kill you, posses you, kill everyone you care about, or  
enter your body and be dormant until it takes over and kills everyone you  
love. (It looks like a plushie verson of Tails except it has a red light on  
its head attached by a wire) Oh and Wesker shall record what happens.

Claire: You may kill Excella in any way you can think of.

Frost: Did you enjoy causing the apocolypse? Now you must flirt with Hoshi in  
front of Wesker. Hoshi shall beat you to a bloody pulp with inflatables, and  
Wesker shall try to kill you.

Wesker: Have fun killing Frost for flirting with the only family member that  
likes you. She is like a younger sister to you.

Sora: I remembered that Hoshi loves yaoi after I stormed out of the studio, and the male character I choose is....... Brad Vickers!

Brad: What did you choose me for?

Sora: You'll see (sends Brad to Hoshi for the VERY detailed explaination of yaoi with visual aids)

Joshua: Chris as the dare states you have one out of three choices which will you choose?

Chris: I'll choose option 3.

Joshua: Okay then Wesker you got the camera set.

Wesker: All ready (has a camera recording)

Chris: okay let's get going then (walks into a bathroom with Wesker holding the camera, locks the door, turns off the lights and starts listening to "Can You Feel the Sunshine")

(once the song is over a red light shines in the bathroom and a cute yet oddly disturbing Tails doll appears.)

Tails Doll: Can you feel the sunshine? (summons a knife and stabs Chris to death before he could answer and then disappears)

Wesker: Chris are you okay? (looks at the camera and sees Chris' massacered body through the camera since it has night vision) That is one violent two-tailed fox doll. (flips on the lights, unlocks the door and exits the bathroom)

Sora: So is the Tails Doll curse true?

Wesker: Apparently it is, and here's your proof (replays the Tails Doll appearing and stabbing Chris to death with a knife)

Sora: For a cute doll it sure it violent, onto more important matters Claire, you can kill Excella anyway you can think of. (sees Stew the zombie janitor sweep out Chris' dead carcas and then brings him back)

Claire: Good, she tried to kill my brother (wields a bow gun with gun powder and shoots Excella about a million times before getting a grenade launcher with flame rounds and kills Excella)

Frost: (sees Hoshi talking to Wesker) Hey there pretty lady, what's cookin' (winks at her)

Hoshi: DIE!!! (starts beating up Frost to a bloody pulp with inflatables until it pops)

Sora: Here Hoshi here's a guitar inflatable (hands Hoshi the inflatable and has two more inflatables in hand)

Hoshi: Thanks.... DIE!! (beats up Frost with the inflatables again until she runs out of inflatable) Now back to explaining what yaoi is to Brad (goes back to Brad and continues her explaination)

Wesker: Frost prepare to die.

Frost: Why? (weakly said because he got beat with inflatables)

Wesker: You just flirted with my cousin! (brings out a Hydra)

Frost: I DIDN'T KNOW!!! (runs as fast as he could from Wesker but barely gets far cuz of his injuries and gets killed)

Joshua: Now to check back with Brad. (sees Brad in the feedle position in a corner looking traumatized)

Brad: I'll never ask what yaoi is ever again, keep it away from me!

Hoshi: My work here is done, bye cousin Albie (goes back to her fanfic)

Sora: Our second to last dares for this chapter come from LDLR!

_*recieves the piece offering cake*thanks sorry agian and here I will let you  
borrow my voodoo dolls it can control a person to do anything and it morphs  
into the person ya want so here and chu gives you guys a buffet lols ok onto  
the dares  
Chris I'm so disappointed!! Did you know that a ghost weakness is cross and  
a camera!? My dog no wonder you almost won in the idiot olympics  
Allen&Alex:to kiddos! How are ya I got you guys morphable voodoo dolls and  
some sweets and torture wesker for me please  
Kruaser I dare ya to try to defeat Moonya my Oc who is older than Me :( but  
one thing you should know she doesn't like too lose so she use her hat that  
pops out incredible things like her own version off zombies the last guy who  
went up againts her was given a memorial  
Salazar are ya related to salazar slytherin I mean you guys wear green and  
you act all sneaky and sometimes crazy like  
And the rest you guys must defeat cerbures the 3 head dog a Huge dragon that  
can kill ya in one swipe and Sora and Joshua torture games and sora they have  
your sweets and before you say no you don't RE chars check ya pockets *evil  
laugh*MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAHAHA and by the way if atleast one you guys  
survive you get to eat with sora joshua at the buffet with more food and such  
soo Byes!!_

Sora: Yay I have morphable voodoo dolls! (looks at her newly obtained voodoo dolls like they're treasures)

Chris: I had no clue that a ghosts weakness was a cross and a camera.

Joshua: Jill even sugested to you to use the cross.

Chris: I didn't think it would work, I read that ghosts were weak against fire.

Sora: You idiot, you watched "Stay Alive" didn't you?

Chris:....... No, I didn't (hesitantly says)

Sora: You did, (finds Allen alone at a table reading a book) Allen since your brother is still in training here's a gift from LDLR (hands him a morphable voodoo doll and sweets)

Allen: Thanks, now I get to give my dad some payback (whispers to Sora and turns his voodoo doll into Wesker and starts sticking him with needles while eating some of the sweets)

Wesker: Ow, ow, ow. Why the hell does it feel like someone is sticking me with needles?!

Joshua: Dunno. Krauser (turns to him) time to face Moonya LDLR's Oc in a fight.

Krauser: I'll win in no time at all (starting to get over-confident)

Joshua: You obviously didn't hear the warning LDLR gave about what happened to the last guy to faced her

Krauser: I don't care, a chick's a chick which means she won't win in a fight against me.

Sora: Ohh that just like you Krauser, this is another reason why I hate you.

Krauser: I don't care bring in this Moonya so I can win my fight already!

Moonya: Prepare to be defeated Krauser (uses her hat to make her off version of zombies apprear and kill Krauser before he had time to blink)

Sora: Moonya's our winner! Thank you for being here Moonya.

Moonya: No prob, someone's gotta fight Krauser to put him in his place, well gotta go back to LDLR. (leaves)

Salazar: Who the hell is Salazar Slytherin? Whoever he is I am not related to him and I wear BLUE not green!

Joshua: It is kind of awkward that you and a character from Harry Potter have the same first name, are you sure you're not related, aside from wearing two different colors you two do act sneaky and are crazy.

Salazar: I am not related to a Harry Potter character I am sure of it!

Joshua: Okay whatever you say. Now the rest of you RE characters get ready to fight Cerberus the 3 headed hound from Hell and a huge dragon that can kill you in one swipe along with mine and Sora's torture games.

Remaining RE Characters: Ohh ****

(Then with Joshua's author powers he puts the rest of the RE characters in a giant cage with Cerberus and a dragon and the fight starts)

Sora: (tries to look for her candy that she had stashed away) Where's my candy?!

Joshua: Sora, don't go assuming that the RE Characters have your candy.

Sora: THEY HAVE MY CANDY!!!! (jumps in the cage and torches and tears apart any RE character she can get her hands on)

(After the killing spree is over Sora checks her pockets to find her secret candy stash and starts happily eating)

Joshua: SORA NO!!!! (tries to get Sora to stop eating the candy but is too late, Sora ate it all)

Sora: (laughs evily and holds her flamethrower possessevly, then springs to her feet) WHEEEEEE!!!!!!!! (begins to try to torch Cerberus and the dragon along with whoever remained alive in the cage)

Joshua: This will take a while for the sugar to wear off

Wesker: So this is what Sora's like when she's on a sugar rush. Hoshi's way worse when she's on a sugar rush.

Joshua: Now you see why I don't allow Sora to have any candy or at least enough for her to have a sugar rush. While Sora is unleashing her sugar high self this last dare is from Tyrant Wolf and your son Alex.

_Tyrant wolf: hello everyone I just thought I could stop by and say hello oh  
and to give you all torture to *evil chuckle*_

alex: HEY DAD! guess what! I killed a grizzly bear using only my claws and  
jaws!

Tyrant: thats what we call our hands and teeth, oh and alex wants to dare you  
so let a rip alex!

alex: ok! hm... lets see?...

Tyrant wolf: *whispers in alex's ear

alex: thanks for the suggestion ok dad, I dare you to do the chicken dance!

Tyrant wolf: while wearing a chicken suit!

alex: yeah while wearing a chicken suit!

Tyrant wolf: and tell your dad what our motto is

alex: "the world can be cruel...but I can be CRUELER!"

Tyrant wolf: well...ten points for you for screaming the word "crueler" now  
go fight some more bears...

alex: *runs out of the room to go fight some more bears*

Tyrant wolf: aren't you just proud of your boy albert? now on with dares

chris - I dare you to yell at a radom animal to "get a job"

barry, steve, HUNK- its time for a dance contest against the family guy team  
(and I wanna see it in the studio)

wesker- you got a dare from your son now its time for me to give you one, i  
dare you to go into a large metal crate with Gir from invader zim and have him  
sing you the "doom song" for seven chapters, you can come out to do other  
dares but then you have to go back in. choose wisley albert for when you put  
on the chicken suit you will be attacked by an army of indestructabl alien fox  
people, you can only use your skip card "once" on "one" dare

claire: i'll give you a truth, which guy do you think is hotter leon or  
wesker?

Wesker: Alex, you're definetely making me proud, I know you're going to be the best heir there ever is.

Allen: Alex, Alex, Alex, that's all you talk about dad (mutters to himself, then stabbed the Wesker voodoo doll with another needle)

Wesker: Ow, damn it, why does that keep happening? (finds a chicken suit) time to do my son's dare. (puts on the chicken suit and does the chicken dance and gets attacked by alien fox people)

Alien Fox #1: Chicken! Lets get him my brethren!

Rest of the Alien Fox People: FOOD!!

Wesker: Back off! (fights off the alien fox people) I'm using my skip card on the invader zim dare. There is no way I will be stuck in a metal crate for seven chapters listening to Gir sing the doom song. (continues to fight off the alien fox people)

Chris: There are no animals in this building!

Joshua: uhh Chris, you forgot that the Cerberus and the dragon are animals, mythological, but still animals.

Chris: Fine (turns to the Cerberus) Get a Job!

Cerberus: I do have a job, I'm supposed to be gaurding the gate to hell, so back off! (kills Chris with one swipe of his paw)

Joshua: Wow thats good, I'm going to check up on Sora... ohh and Barry, Steve, and HUNK you have to go against the Family Guy Team in a dance competition.

Barry, Steve, and HUNK: WHAT?! AGAINST THEM AGAIN?!

Joshua: Yeah so get on the stage and dance, I gotta make sure Sora didn't get herself hurt (runs off to find Sora sleeping on the double king sized bed with the lickers around her sleeping) She's going to have fun waking up to that.

(Meanwhile Barry, Steve, and HUNK along with Brian, Stewey, and Peter were on the stage and preparing themselves for the dance competition)

Stewey: You're going to lose this competition just like the tennis match

Steve: Ohh yeah, well you better think again, you brat, cuz we're going to take a win for the Resident Evil team.

Peter: No you're not, come on fellas we got a dance competition to win.

(The first team to go is the Family Guy team and their dance was the dance they do in the into to their show and once they were done the RE team didn't look phased)

Barry: Is that all you got? Let's wipe the floor with them team.

Steve: Yeah, payback time.

(As the RE team takes their place on stage, Japanese pop music starts playing and the song that was playing was "Real Me" by Ayumi Hamasaki. As the song continued to play the RE team danced in perfect synch to it until the song ended)

Joshua: The winners of the dance competition is Team Resident Evil!

Family Guy Team: WHAT?! (then before they could say a word, the team got catapulted out of the studio)

Joshua: Claire since yours is truth, who do you think is hotter? Wesker or Leon?

Claire: Wesker's hotter.

Everyone except Sora: (stares at Claire)

Claire: What? It's true he is hotter than Leon.

Sora: (starting to wake up) Huh? What happened here?

Carlos: You don't remember going on a burning spree?!

Sora: No, but I did have a dream that I was trying to torch a Cerberus, a dragon and some of the RE characters.

Barry: That wasn't a dream, it really happened.

Sora: Ohh sorry, hey Joshua do we have anymore dares.

Joshua: No Sora, that was the last of the dares for this chapter and could you please get out of that bed before those lickers kill you.

Random Licker: (cuddled against Sora)

Sora: I don't think I can move so to close out the Zombie Dance Team is doing the "Locomotion". Hope you liked this chapter and please send in more dares.

(The spotlight hits the Zombie Dance Team and they start dancing to the Locomotion)


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil Capcom does, all I own is Sora and Joshua.**

Sora: This is such a good movie (for some reason watching 28 Days Later with the Lickers that refuse to let Sora go)

Joshua: Sora..... care to join the rest of us?

Sora: I can't I'm trapped! The lickers won't let me go!

Joshua: Let me speak with them. (walks to the bed inhabiting the lickers and speaks like the lickers until they allowed Sora to go)

Sora: Thanks (jumps off the bed) what'd you say to them?

Joshua: I promised them ultra rare steak if they let you go.

Chris: (Laughs) You just got negotiated over a piece of meat!

Sora: (Brings out her infinite flamethrower) Care to say that again Christopher?

Chris: No ma'am

Sora: I thought so, now for our first dare from LDLR.

_Aws Allen don't you worry me and my family will teach ya the ways of our own  
and such so can borrow him for awhile please?? If so thanks and here you guys  
a dessert table ya know a table full of sweets? Ok onto the dares!  
Chris I dare you to defeat this time a Mythical god named Loki! And you must  
figure out which god he is and what he does. (for eyes for sora and joshua  
only) He is a Norse god and he likes to prank people  
Wesker I dare ya to act like chris and then you must must do whatever fangirl  
want ya to do okies  
Krauser (moonya) Ha in your face I told ya the last guy who fought me had a  
memorial so now I moonya dare you to be my servant forever *insert evil laugh*  
Mwuahahahahahahaha!  
Lily(me);*sweatdrops* this is what happens when she doesn't get her daily  
sugar  
Ok for um claire I dare ya to go um emo then hyper and annoying sister to  
chris  
Chu: to peoples I made some bento for everyone in the whole cast fic! So  
enjoy and my last dare is for everyone Is to find a funny way to die except for  
sora and joshua byes *glomps Joshua before going* dang lickers are so dang  
kawaii!_

Allen: See ya everyone, I'm going with Lily and her family. (gets picked up by Lily and leaves)

Joshua: At least Allen's in good hands, right Sora? Sora? (turns around to see Sora staring at the dessert table with sparkling red eyes ((the red eyes are due to Las Plagas)) ) Sora, don't even think about it!

Sora: But it's calling me, taunting me, I WANT TO EAT THE DESSERTS! (About to pounce on the dessert table but many of the Lickers that inhabited the bed stopped her)

Joshua: Thank you my licker bretheren

Chris: Who the hell is Loki? How should I know what god he is and what he does, I know nothing about mythical junk.

Sora and Wesker: You are so helpless (looks at eachother and shudder that they said the exact same thing)

Joshua: Hey Sora isn't Loki mentioned in a mo....... (has his mouth covered by Sora)

Sora: Shhhh (takes her hand off Joshua's mouth) the chupacabaras are sleeping, don't mention the "m" word.

Most of the RE Characters: What chupacabras?

Sora: Nothing, and while Chris tries to figure out what Loki is, Wesker act like Chris and do whatever the fangirls tell you to do.

Wesker: I hate this

Joshua: Too bad now get to acting.

Wesker: Fine.... (unwillingly messes up his hair to look like Chris' hairstyle) I'm Chris, even though I'm a BSAA agent how is it that I am a retard who is able to beat someone five times stonger than me?

Fangirl #1: Mention how you were heroic when trying to defeat Wesker in Antartica.

Wesker: Since Wesker was my enemy I tried to take him on even though he has powers far beyond human means and yet what happened I got beat the crap out of and all I could do was make a pile of steel beams land on Wesker.

Joshua: ohh I'm so sorry Krauser but your now officially Moonya's servant for life since you lost the fight against her.

Krauser: That battle she won was a fluke, she's probably not all high and mighty without that hat of hers.

Sora: Jerk!!!! Women can do anything a man can do, but better!

Krauser: Doubt it.

Leon: Krauser, buddy, umm you forgotten that Sora is the hostess and has authoress powers (backed away from Krauser, and had his black hair and wore the exact same thing Krauser was wearing except the berret)

Krauser: Still aside from those tiny details, she's nothing but a weak woman.

Sora: (cracks her knuckles and pops her neck) Listen you berret wearing freak, even without my authoress powers I can take you down.

Krauser: Care to put your money where your mouth is.

Sora: You're on (slaps $200 on a table) $200 bucks saying that I can take you down without my authoress powers, only hand-to-hand combat.

Krauser: You got yourself a deal

Sora: but if you lose then you're moonya's servant forever but if I lose then I'll be your servant for two chapters.

Krauser: Two chapters?! That doesn't sound like a fair deal.

Sora: Take it or Leave it.

Krauser: Fine, but no one helps either one of us.

Sora: Got it (uses authoress powers to put herself and Krauser in the same cage used for the Cerberus and the dragon)

Krauser: This should be an easy win (grabs the collar of Sora's shirt and sees Sora smirk) What's with the smirk?

Sora: You just lost (grabbed Krauser's wrist, pulled back and when Krauser lost his balance almost falling on Sora, she elbowed him square in the face... technically in the nose thus killing him) I win! Thank you martial arts!

Wesker: Impressive, you should make an excellent soldier when I rule the world.

Sora: You are soo disillusioned, I will never join you if you ever rule the world, which is never. (looks at Claire) You know what to do Claire.

Claire: Whatever (doesn't seem to be happy) I don't really give a care.

Chris: Hey sis, do you have any idea what Loki is exactly I can't figure my dare out.

Claire: Figure it out on your own, I don't feel like helping you (acting depressed)

Chris: Claire what's wrong?

Claire: Nothing, nothing's wrong, I really like this studio its sooooo huge, it fits everybody in here along with a stage, a huge fanpit, a cage for whatever creature goes in it, two tables with food, and everything you can imagine (says really fast and hyper like)

Chris: What the?

Joshua: You figured it out yet, you need to defeat Loki before this chapter is done.

Chris: I can't figure it out!

Sora: "Son of the Mask" does that movie ring any bells?

Chris: No it doesn't, I've never seen that movie.

Everyone in the building except Chris: You're hopeless.

Joshua: Everyone, here are bentos from Chu, and once you're done eating them you have to die in a funny way..... except for me and Sora.

RE Characters: What? (just got finished eating the bentos)

Frost: okay (stabs himself with an umbrella)

Sora: Okkay, that's a little ironic isn't it.

Brad: Yeah it is, (somehow slips on a random piece of fruit and falls head first into a razor bladed pit)

Joshua: Sora, should I even......

Sora: No, it would be proper not to ask at a time like this.

Barry: (somehow got silly puddy and swallowed it thus dying)

Salazar: (drinks a bottle of gasoline without knowing it thinking it was water and for some reason swallows a lit match and blows to pieces)

Jill: Aww the bunnies are soo adorible (sees what looked like ordinary rabbits but they're infected with the T-virus and ate Jill)

Rebecca: I'm tired (walks over to the licker infested bed, plops down on the mattress and gets torn apart by the lickers)

Stew: (grumbles/moans as he starts cleaning)

Sora: Stew! You've returned. (glomps Stew) Hey is that armadillo? (takes a piece of armadillo off of Stew) ohh I get it you were in Hoshi's fic.

Chris: WHO THE HELL IS LOKI!!!!!!!!

Richard: Loki is a Norse God and he likes to pull pranks on people

Sora and Joshua: RICHARD!!!

Chris: Thank you Richard, you're a good man! Loki come on out I challenge you to a fight!

Loki: Let's play. (appeared in a cowboy outfit and looked like he was going to draw two pistols)

Chris: You've got to be kidding me.

Loki: Draw, (quickly fires both guns at Chris in the happy place and the face)

Sora: Loki wins, have fun trying to get your mask back again.

Loki: What?!

Sora: Yeah, I found some poor loser with your mask going to Australia.

Loki: I must get my mask back (disappears to get his mask back)

Joshua: You just had to lie to him, didn't you?

Sora: Yep, it's fun, but now time for Christian-Ann Redfield's dare (quickly revives everyone)

_sorry for the misunderstanding..._

_Now, here are my dares,_

_I dare Sora and Joshua to teach a making out lesson to all RE pairings...  
Claire/Wesker  
Chris/Jill  
Rebecca/Billy  
Leon/Ada  
Carlos/Ashley PS: even though they didn't like each other._

_I dare Jill to say I'm I Love in an idiot.(reffering to Chris)  
I dare Wesker to make him and claire an official couple  
I dare Alfred to kiss Alexia  
I dare Leon to be an emo  
I dare Claire to say to Chris that she loves wesker 25x  
And lastly, I dare Chris to say to wesker take care of my precious sister.  
Thanks for giving us opportunity to make dares!  
Keep up the writing and the story!_

_hehe GOOD Luck!_

Joshua: Claire, Wesker, Chris, Jill, Rebecca, Billy, Leon, Ada, Carlos, Ashley time for your make out lesson taught by me and my lovely assistant Sora.

Sora: Don't even try to flirt with me, last time someone tried to flirt with me they ended up getting kneed in the happy place!

Wesker: You're almost like my cousin, except she'll try to beat the person who flirted with her to a bloody pulp.

Sora: Thank you and now for your make out lesson

Characters involved: This should get interesting.

Ashley: Hey wait a minute! Why the hell am I paired up with this guy? (points to Carlos) I don't even know him.

Joshua: Too bad you have to make out with him anyway

Ashley: I want to make out with Leon.

Sora: We all do but this dare favorited the Leon/Ada pairing.

Joshua: Sora time to give these pairings a make out lesson.

Sora: I'm coming.

// some time later (A/N: I don't know how to give the lesson so I made time fly)

Joshua: Now that's the conclusion of our lesson, hope you all learned something.

Claire: We sure did

Sora: Jill, what do you have to say for your dare?

Jill: I'm in love with an idiot!

Chris: Hey!!

Sora and Wesker: You are an idiot (look at eachother again and shudder)

Sora: We've really gotta stop doing that.

Wesker: I agree (then walks over to Claire and hands her a small beautifully wrapped box) I've been wanting to give this to you.

Claire: (takes the box, opens it and sees a gorgeous ruby pear drop choker with matching earings) Wow this is beautiful, thank you Albert

Chris: Wait a sec.... does this mean you and Wesker are a couple?!

Wesker: Yes it does Christopher, better deal with it.

Chris: NOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (drops on his knees screaming at the sky)

Alexia: Christian-Ann Redfield wants my **BROTHER** to kiss me!?

Sora: looks like it Ms. Ashford

Alfred: (walks over to Alexia, and plants one on her and then gets burned alive by his own sister)

Joshua: That was entertaining to watch (looks over to Leon who looks like he doesn't give a care about anything) Leon you okay?

Leon: Yeah, I'm fine (his mood worsens)

Claire: Chris I have something to say to you.

Chris: Let me guess, you're breaking up with Wesker! (hopes that he's right)

Claire: No, I love Wesker.......

// 24 "I love Wesker"s later //

Chris: Alright I get it!! Wesker (turns to him, takes a deep breath and swallows his pride and hatred against him) take care of my precious sister. (walks in a dark room and sobs about how he lost his sister to his nemesis)

Joshua: While Chris is crying over his sister our next dare is from Zombiegirl2007

_I love this fic It's super funny. I dare Ada, Angela and Ashley to fight with  
each other to Prove There Love For Leon, Losers Will Get thrown to the fan  
boys pits. Curtis Miller and William Transform To your g form and fight.  
Sergei, Oswell, James Marcus, Vincent Goldman and Morpheus D. Duvall are going  
to be on one team coached by wesker The other team Ark, Steve, Leon, Forest and  
Richard will be coached by Chris for Basketball Oh wait there a catch the court  
will be a grave yard and Kenneth's Head will be the basketball lol. I dare  
Billy to break up with Rebbecca So I can go Out with him Im a fan girl.  
Rebecca and Claire Have to Take Sherry, Lott, Lily, and Salazar to Chuck .E.  
Cheeses. Barry Gets to kill wesker with a gun of his choices. Steve go through  
puberty Stew get the next 3 Chapters off and Alexia Can where a maid clothes  
and clean it up im done i will come back mahahahah_

Ada: It's about time I get to prove my love to Leon. (loads her machine gun)

Angela: I'm the one who loves Leon more! (brings out her handgun)

Ashley: No I'm the one who will win this fight (weilds a flashlight)

(Then all three girls begin to fight, not knowing that Sora "borrowed" Wesker's infinite rocket launcher)

Sora: MY LOVE FOR LEON IS STRONGER!!!!!!!!!! (fires the RL at the three women, then blows a kiss to Leon) I love you Leon!

Leon: (mildly disturbed that Sora jumped in the fight when it wasn't her fight to be in)

Wesker: Give me back my rocket launcher! (snatches it away from Sora)

Sora: (revives Ada, Angela, and Ashley and picks all three up) To the fanboy pit with you! (throws all three in the pit and hears the boys cheer and the girls scream)

Curtis: (transforms into his G form)

William: (Just now walked in with Annette and Sherry) Damn we just had to get back at the wrong time (Does the same thing as Curtis and begins to fight with him in the steel cage)

Sherry: Go daddy!! Kick his butt!!

Annette: You can beat him honey! You're stronger than that guy!

Angela: Kick that scientis' ** (screams from the fanboy pit)

Curtis: (stabs William in the right arm only to get pushed back by William)

William: (transforms into his fourth form and takes a bite out of Curtis)

Curtis: (roars out in pain then stabs William once more)

(After who knows how long, Curtis and William stab eachother in the weakspot which is the eye-looking tumor and dies)

Sherry: Daddy!!! (cries)

Annette: William no!! (cries too as she holds Sherry in her arms)

Angela: Curtis... (sheds a few tears after escaping the fanboy pit with Ada and Ashley)

Wesker: Troops fall in NOW!

Sergie, Spencer, James Marcus, Vincent Goldman, and Morpheus: Yes sir! (lines up in a line infront of Wesker)

Chris: Ark, Steve, Leon, Forest, Richard, get over here.

Ark, Steve, Leon, Forest, and Richard: (get over to Chris)

Sora: Alright men, the game is basketball, but the court will be in a graveyard, the ball will be Kenneth's head and lastly we want a nice clean game which means no guns (points to both teams), no mutations (looks at Wesker's team), and no taking advantage of the nearly disabled (looks at Chris' team). You have one hour to practice.....good luck. (leaves the teams to their practice.)

Chris: Wesker, you're going down.

Wesker: Not likely Redfield.

Joshua: Teams here are your uniforms (hands a two huge boxes to both team captains)

Wesker: (looks in his box to see black combat clothings of all sizes) Nice choice of uniform.

Chris: (looks in his box) How did I know that this was going to be the uniform. (pulls out a insanely bright green and yellow S.T.A.R.S uniform)

Richard and Forest: Damn it. (takes the uniform)

Wesker: Good thing I have my sunglasses (adjusts his shades)

Steve: Shut it you psycho. (takes his uniform while watching Wesker's team take their uniforms)

// 30 minutes later //

Sora: Alright teams are you ready to rumble! (appeared in a referee uniform)

Chris: You're the referee?

Sora: That's right, Joshua's the score keeper and penalty ensuer.

Spencer: There's no such thing as penalty ensuer. (coughs)

Joshua: Now there is and I will take my job seriously which is not good for you cuz if Sora calls penalty I will choose what will happen to whoever recieved the penalty.

Sora: Let the game begin! (pulls out a scythe from a random box and slices Kenneth's head off and uses authoress powers to take them all to the graveyard)

**// At the Graveyard where the game is being held //**

(The graveyard had tombstones all over the place, the trees were perfectly shaped to be the basketball rims and spider webs were the nets)

Steve: This is a lovely place for a basketball game (being sarcastic and tried to focus on something else other than the neon STARS uniforms)

Richard: I've seen worse.

Spencer: Ms. Avalon, how am I supposed to play this game if I'm crippled.

Sora: You can walk, you're not completely crippled. (walks to the middle of the court with Kenneth's head) team captains come over here, and team players get into position.

RE Characters: (did as they were told)

Sora: Chris, Wesker, shake hands and lets have a good clean game.

Chris and Wesker: (shake hands and Wesker was trying to squeeze the life out of Chris' hand)

Joshua: Hey let go of Chris' hand! (pries Wesker and Chris' hands apart) Sora, start the game. (walks off the court and sits in a chair labled Penalty Ensuer)

Sora: Play ball! (thows Kenneth's head in the air and dashes off the court and into her referee chair as Wesker and Chris jumped for the head which ended up going on Wesker's side)

(The game when on for over 2 hours surprisingly with Chris' team with 45pts and Wesker's team 48pts and both teams had suffered Joshua's cruel and unusual penalties)

Sergei: Spencer pass the head quick! (tried to keep himself from being blocked by Chris)

Spencer: (coughs and tosses the ball to Sergie before getting tackled by Leon)

Leon: Sorry old man (quickly gets up and goes after the head which was now in Sergei's possession)

Morpheus: Sergei give me the head! (ran close to the basket and tried to hold off Steve from trying to get in his way)

Sergei: (Threw the head to Morpheus who threw the head into the spiderweb net thus scoring their 50th point)

Wesker: Good work team,

Forest: (Body chucked Wesker thus making Sora blow the whisle)

Sora: Foul! Foul! Penalty goes to Chris' Team.

Chris, Leon, Richard, and Steve: Forest.

Joshua: (chuckles evily, walks over to Chris' team and looks at them evily) What should I do to you, ohh so many choices. That reminds me, I haven't had living meat in a while.

Sora: Joshua!

Joshua: Fine I'll take one body part from them.

Chris' Team: WHAT?!

Sora: I'll allow it, but nothing too severe.

Joshua: How about the left hand?

Sora: No, they need both hands. Wesker, since you were body chucked what do you suppose should be eaten by Joshua?

Wesker: Joshua, you can feast on their vocal cords.

Chris' Team: (eye's gone wide at Wesker's choice)

Sora: Joshua, you heard the man.

Joshua: (uses author powers to take the vocal cords of Chris' Team and ate it.) a little bitter yet slightly tangy.... it's been a while since I had fresh organs.

Sora: Back to the game people, the game will end when one team gets 62 pts.

(After 25 to 30 minutes Chris' team managed to catch up with Wesker's and only 1 minute was left on the clock)

Chris: (mouths "Leon toss Kenneth's head to me" and gets the head tossed to him)

Wesker: I guess its tough communicating with your team without using your voice. (Blocking Chris from getting to his basket)

Chris: (flips Wesker off and tries to move passed him but fails)

Richard: (somehow snuck behind Vincent Goldman and James Marcus and started jumping up and down to get Chris' attention to throw the head to him)

Chris: (tosses the head to Richard and he succeeds in making a basket causing both teams to tie as the timer ran out)

Sora: Game over, now it's time to do a tie breaker!

Forest: (uses sign language to say "What is the tie breaker?")

Joshua: Glad you asked Forest and it's a simple challenge really. Kill all zombies that show up behind those tombstones (points to three perfect rows of tombstones) Captains here are your handguns, and you have 5 minutes on the clock, most kills wins.

Wesker: I've already won this, I was best marksman back in my STARS days, Chris was always second best.

Chris: (flips Wesker off once more before taking his position)

Joshua: Three....Two.....One..... Start (presses the timer to start the clock and the zombies pop up behind the tombstones like the "Whack-a-Mole" game)

(Once the clock started Chris and Wesker were shooting like crazy, a few of Wesker's shots surprisingly missed since the zombies were fast moving and by the time the challenge ended Chris had ended up winning by one zombie)

Chris: (mouths "Yeah, in your face Wesker!")

Wesker: (Stabs Chris in the chest with his fist thus killing him)

Sora: Wow someone's a sore loser.

Wesker: Watch your mouth Avalon (aims his RL at Sora)

Sora: You can't kill me with that, and since you're thinking about it I'm going to have to confiscate that (takes away the RL and sends everyone back to the studio)

**// Back at the Studio //**

Sora: Yo, yo, yo wat up my peeps (acting like a gansta causing some RE characters to wonder what's going on in Sora's head)

Joshua: Sora, don't ever do that again.

Sora: Fine, also Rebecca, Billy, I'm sorry to say this but you have to break up so Zombiegirl2007 can date Billy since she's his fan.

Rebecca: NO!

Billy: Sorry Becca, I'm afraid that we're through.

Rebecca: (breaks down crying)

Jill: Don't worry Becca, there are plenty of other fish in the sea, you just have to fish out your perfect man.

Rebecca: But Billy is my perfect man.

Sora: Ohh shut it Claire, Becca, you two have to take Sherry, Lott, Lily, and Salazar to Chuck .E. Cheeses for a fun time.

Salazar: What the hell is Chuck .E. Cheeses?

Sherry, Lott, and Lily: Its a kid's pizza place with games.

Salazar: I'M 20 YEARS OLD, I'M NOT A CHILD!!!!!!!!!!!

Joshua: Deal with it ya little midget and go have a good time.

Claire and Rebecca: See ya later. (leaves with the three kids and the angry midget)

**// Chuck .E. Cheeses //**

Salazar: I can't believe I'm here in this place. (still steaming mad that he had to go to a kids place)

Claire: Salazar relax will you, just have fun here or if you don't want to play the games here then you can just sit with me and Rebecca and chow down on some pizza and salads.

Sherry, Lott, and Lily: See ya (runs off to play games)

Rebecca: Claire we need to order the pizza.

Claire: alright

Chuck .E. Cheeses waiter: Hello welcome to Chuck .E. Cheeses, are you ready to order?

Claire: Yes we would like two large pizzas with...... (suddenly all three kids came to the table Claire, Rebecca, and Salazar were at)

Lott and Lily: half with sausage and pineapples.

Sherry: I would like my half with just cheese

Rebecca: I want pepperoni on my half

Salazar: I would like green peppers, onions, and olives on mine.

Chuck .E. Cheeses waiter: Alrighty, anything to drink?

Claire, Rebecca, and Sherry: Dr. Pepper

Lott: Mt. Dew

Lily: Water

Salazar: tea

Chuck .E. Cheeses waiter: sweet or unsweetened?

Salazar: Sweetened

Chuck .E. Cheeses waiter: Alright your order will come in the next hour, I'll be back with your drinks in a few (leaves to give the orders to the chef)

Rebecca: Okay kids go have fun, we'll come and find you when the pizzas come

Sherry, Lott, and Lily: (runs off to play games once more)

// an hour later //

Chuck .E. Cheeses waiter: (walks over to the RE character's table with two pizzas in both arms) here are your pizzas, hope you enjoy them (walks away after placing the bill on the table)

Rebecca: Don't worry about the bill I got it.

Claire: You sure? (takes a piece of pizza and eats it)

Rebecca: Yeah (then looks at the bill) I can definitely afford over $30 bucks worth of food.

(once everyone was done eating and playing games the RE characters returned to the studio)

**// Back in the Studio //**

Claire: We're back! (walks in to see Sora playing cards with Wesker while the rest of the RE characters were revived but bound in ropes)

Wesker: I know you're not able to read my mind, so how the living hell do you know what cards I have?

Sora: That's my little dark secret Wezzy (staring intensely at his glasses which reflected the cards)

Wesker: I will win.

Sora: Think again Wezzy...... (slaps down her hand) Royal Flush, I win, now pay up!

Wesker: Damn (pulls out his wallet and gives Sora over $5000)

Claire: What the hell?

Chris: Sora and Wesker were playing cards and Sora said that if she won he'd give have to give her $5000 but if he won Sora would have no choice but to give back his rocket launcher, but Sora won.

Claire: Ohh.

Joshua: Now that the card game is over Barry choose your gun of choice to kill Wesker with. (points to the wall of guns)

Barry: I'm sticking with my companion (pulls out his magnum revolver and shoots Wesker in the head)

Sora: That could've gone better, and now Stew you get 3 chapters off and Alexia you have to take his place while wearing a maid's outfit.

Alexia: WHAT?! (all of a sudden forced into a maid's outfit)

Stew: (moans with glee and sits in a chair eating a ultra rare steak and drinking blood)

Joshua: Steve you have to go through puberty.

Steve: I've already been through puberty!

Sora: Apparently you haven't since your voice cracked when calling Claire for help on Rockfort Island and then went back to its almost feminine octave.

Steve: (all of a sudden goes through puberty) I hated puberty the first time (his voice sounded a little deeper)

Joshua: Steve has finally reached puberty everyone applaud for this wonderful moment (making everyone in the studio applaud for Steve going through puberty)

Sora: And to end this chapter here's a dare from Black Dragon41

_XJ X3 XD - ThanX for using my Dares. Now with more Torture!_

_I Dare Alfred to be slung across the studio using a giant sling-shot._

_I Dare Wesker to wear a crown of roses._

_I Dare Chris to take Deppressants._

_I Dare Krausar to scuba dive in a tank full of Neptunes._

_AND..._

_I Dare Billy to fight against an infected gorilla using a plastic fork._

_Sorry all R.E characters, but this is too much fun!_

Sora: YAY I've been wanting to test out my new sling-shot!

Alfred: What sling-shot?

Sora: This one (pulls off a giant cover to reveal a giant sling-shot)

Alfred: You cannot pay me enough to be flung across the studio in that death trap.

Joshua: (uses his licker tongue to place Alfred in the sling-shot) Have fun.

Sora: FIRE!!! (pulls the lever to fling Alfred across the studio and hears a sickening splat) That was funny.

Joshua: Chris here's your perscribed depressants (hands Chris a bottle and walks away)

Sora: Wezzy!!! Here's your crown of roses (holds out a crown of red and white roses to Wesker)

Wesker: You've got to be kidding me.

Sora: Nope, (forcefully places the crown of roses on Wesker's head) you look so pretty!

Wesker: Shut your mouth. (trying to surpress his anger against Sora)

Chris: (reads the directions, takes out two pills and pops them in his mouth and drinks out of a bottle labled "Licker Saliva")

Excella: Ohh, that's where the Licker Saliva went. (takes the bottle from Chris' hand)

Chris: (runs to the bathroom to throw up actually thinking he drank licker saliva)

Krauser: This should get really interesting (puts on scuba gear)

Sora: Have fun in there, the tank is full of Neptunes.

Krauser: (dives in the tank, avoiding a few of the Neptunes but then gets his limbs and torso bit off by several Neptunes.)

Sora: Billy!!! Time to play with Herman!

Billy: Who's Herman?

Sora: (Points to an infected gorilla looking ready to rip Billy limb from limb and then hands Billy a plastic fork) Herman loves it when people have plastic forks.

Billy: What's wrong with you?

Herman: (grabs Billy's head and starts slamming him into everything in sight)

Alexia: Damn it, stop bloodying up everything, who do you think has to clean all of this! (finds a mop and starts wiping the wall down)

Joshua: Sora, you do know that Herman has to go back to the Umbrella Russian Facility as soon as he's done here.

Sora: NO!! (sees Herman done killing Billy and returned to his relatively small cage) Well it's time to send him back, and to close out this chapter the zombie dance team will dance the "Nut Cracker Suite" (ships off Herman back to Russia) Please read and review!

(spotlight hits the stage and the zombie dance team are dressed in leotards and tutus and started dancing as soon as the music started playing)


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil Capcom does, nor do I own Gir from Invader Zim, the Family Guy characters or Tails Doll from Sonic, I just own Sora, Joshua, and Stew the zombie janitor.**

// Somewhere in the Studio //

Sora: (reading through a resume) Your resume is impressive and has been accepted. Your first victim will come in when I send him or her in.

Joshua: Sora, where are you? (searching all over the studio for his partner)

Sora: One moment sir (exits the room and sees Joshua) Joshua, I'll be right with you and the rest of the characters in a minute, I'm just about to get done with an interview.

Joshua: What interview?

Sora: You'll see in due time, just go and entertain the chararcters I have a few more people to interview.

Joshua: Okay, this better not be those new shipments of deranged chupacabras that you ordered!

Sora: Don't worry it's not, just go announce the first dare, I'll notify you when I get done. This is serious business, I have to get these people to join us so I have to continue with the interviews.

Joshua: ...... Good luck. (leaves and goes to the main room where the RE characters were waiting for the torture to start.) Alright everyone, Sora is occupied at the moment so I'll be taking over until she's done and our first dare is from none other than Tyrant Wolf and Alex Wesker.

_Tyrant wolf: MUAHAHAHA! you don't have don't have a skip ANYMORE! so now its  
TORTURE TIME!_

_alex: lemme guess, you only used the IZ dare to get my dad to use his skip  
card?_

_Tyrant wolf: DING! BINGO!_

_alex: oh god...your on your pickle cravings arn't you?_

_Tyrant wolf: WERES THE MAGIC DILL PICKLE STORK!?_

_alex: ...-_-" well she isn't able to say anything without screaming Dill,  
pickle, or stork-_

_Tyrant wolf: I WANT MY PICKLES!_

_alex: ...so it looks like i'm going to have to anounce the dares fore her,  
*clears throat and takes out a peice of paper*_

_wesker- Tyrant wolf wants you to let Gir sing you the "Doom Song" but instead  
of seven chapters it should be three LONG gruling days..._

_barry, steve, HUNK- time fore one last round with the Family Guy team to  
detirmen the ultiment winner...IN A COOKING CONTEST!_

_chris, carlos- time fore yo-mama joke fight!_

_alexia, alfed- T-wolf wants you guys to have a water balloon fight but using  
eggs fore a substitution!, so yeah your basicly throwing eggs at eachother_

_alex: that's all for now_

Wesker: Ohh god why? (groaned cuz he hates the "Doom Song")

Joshua: Don't ask me, ask the demon wolf who's training your son.

Barry, Steve, and HUNK: THIS BETTER BE THE LAST COMPETITION!!!!!

HUNK: I hate those Family Guy characters.

Steve: Don't we all.

Joshua: For the cooking contest both teams have to make a filet mingon, a tender loin steak and lastly a wedding cake. (licking his lips just thinking about the steak)

Peter: Damn, we're sunk.

Brian: We can't let those videogame characters win this.

Stewey: That's right we have a TV show while they're just in some videogames.

Steve: You forgot that some Resident Evil characters are in four full-length movies soon to be five.

Stewey: Shut up **

HUNK: You're going down little man.

Joshua: People to your work stations, Gir start singing the "Doom Song" I feel that this will take three days.

Gir: (starts singing the "Doom Song")

(The kitchen was a total mess when both teams finished the filet mingon both teams have successfully pissed off Alexia)

Joshua: Wesker since you have feasted on exquisite dishes, taste the filet mingon.

Wesker: Fine, (sits at a table and sees two plate of filet mingon with two of the teams lables on the plates and takes a bite out of the RE's dish) I've tasted better, (takes a bite out of Family Guy's filet and just points to the RE character's dish)

Joshua: guess that means Wesker likes Team RE's dish, now onto the next dish.... the tender....loin....steak. (mouth watering just thinking about the meat)

(Once again in the kitchen the two teams work on making the steak thus making a even bigger mess in the kitchen and angering Alexia to a further extent)

Both Teams: Done (bringing out two plates of steaks)

Joshua: I will be the judge of this dish! (took a bite out of the Family Guy's dish, cringed a bit and swallowed it. Ate part of the RE's dish and saliva was dripping from his mouth after eating the steak)

Barry: I knew that my wife's steak recipe would come in handy.

HUNK: Luckily I remembered my high school bbq sauce recipe which won the blue ribbon in the Iron Chef Competition.

Steve: Good thing I watched all those cooking shows when I was bored at home.

Both Teams: Now for the cake.

// 3 long days later //

Gir: (Finished his song and left the studio leaving Wesker twitching angrily and Alexia three times as pissed off at the teams for dirtying up the kitchen once again.)

Joshua: We need someone to taste the cake, I can't since I'm a licker I love meat and lost my taste for baked goods.

Sherry: I'll taste it! (ran to the table where the two wedding cakes were and were easily recognizable by the icing color variation) I'll try the RE cake first (took out a fork and a knife, cut a slice and ate it but made a sour face) ugg, what did you put in this cake.... lemons and lemon extract?

Steve: opps

Sherry: Now for the Family Guy cake (took a piece, ate it and didn't make a face) it's tolerable, point for Family Guy.

Stewey: Yeah in your face.

HUNK: Uhh shorty, we won the competition, RE rules!!!

Steve: Now time for your exit (pulls a lever which catapults the Family Guy team out of the studio)

// In a dark room somewhere in the studio //

Sora: (looking at another resume) So I see that you're skills are throwing dangerous objects at unsuspecting people and speaking really fast.

???: Yes I speak really fast, my momma said it always got on her nerves and that's why she had to go to therapy and my grandpa had to go to the hospital 46 times on account of me throwing sharp lethal objects at random things. (spoke really fast that it gave Sora a headache)

Sora: Okay, you've got the job, you start today.

???: Thankyou (got up and walked out the back door)

Sora: Damn that person's good, (looks at the last resume) last one, this better not fail me.... come on in, door's open.

(a Hunter walks in and sat down in the chair in front of Sora's desk)

Sora: I see that you can really help with victims by causing major and life threatening injuries, cutting flesh into ribbons, cubes, and whatever shape you can think of, and you're part frog and human..... you'll do perfectly!

Hunter: (gargles "thank you")

Sora: You begin today, I believe you'll love who you're going to be working with. Now if you'll excuse me it's time for me to get back to the dares and you exit out the back door and enter the second door on your left. (leaves the room while the Hunter exits through the back door)

// Back in the main room of the studio //

Sora: Hey! I'm back, what's going on next?

Joshua: Chris and Carlos are going to do a "Yo mama joke-fight"

Carlos: Yo mama's so stupid she failed a survery, I mean come on who can fail a survey.

Chris: Yo mama's so ugly I took her to a haunted house and she came out with a job application.

Rest of the RE Character: Ohhh.

Carlos: Yo mama's so stupid she stopped at a stop sign and waited for it to say go.

Chris: Yo mama's so old she recalls when the Grand Canyon was a ditch.

Carlos: Yo mama's so poor she was watching television on a "Etch-a-Sketch"

Chris: Yo mama's so poor when I visited her trailer, 2 cockroaches tripped me and a rat tried to steal my wallet.

Sora: Is there a point to these jokes?

Joshua: I don't even know, I know there's a show called "Yo Mama" but I never could watch it when it comes on since I always kept missing it and Chuck hogged the TV.

Sora: Ohh, (reads the review from Tyrant Wolf) Alexia, Alfred, time for your egg fight.

Alexia: NO, I will not have egg throwing in this studio, Stew the zombie janitor is off for two more chapters and I have to take over for him.

Alfred: Throwing eggs is just beyond immature, its vulgar.

Sora: I knew you would say that, this is why I purchased hard-boiled eggs (got out a dozen cartons of eggs)

Alexia: Good, at least hard-boiled will be less of a mess to clean up. (grabs an egg and thows it at Alfred)

Alfred: Wait these aren't hard-boiled!

Sora: Yes they are keep throwing.

Alfred and Alexia: (keep throwing eggs at eachother until they run out and Alexia gets mad once again after seeing huge gobs of eggs all over the place)

Joshua: Now that the egg fight has come to an end, its time for our next dare and Alexia to start cleaning. These two dares are from Spark of Insanity

_Hehe Claire and Wesker seem to have the hots for each other ^.^ (I'm a huge  
ClairexWesker fan) and Yeys the Hare Hare Yukai ^.^  
Ok, so dare time xD  
I dare Wesker, Jill, Claire, Rebecca, and Leon to dance the Hare Hare Yukai.  
I dare S.T.A.R.S. to redo the whole mansion incident.  
I dare Wesker to train a cerberus to do tricks (especially play dead)  
And my brothers and sister dare Jill to make out with a zombie, Leon to go on  
Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader? and fail, and Wesker to go on Deal or No  
Deal._

_Great Job btw ^.^_

_Another funny chapter ^.^  
I dare the whole RE cast to dance the end of Stay Away by Larc En Ciel. Can't  
think of anything else at the min.  
Will be waiting for the next update_

Sora: YAY I love the Hare Hare Yukai!

Wesker, Jill, Rebecca, Claire, and Leon: What's the Hare Hare Yukai?

Joshua: Its a dance from an anime, do any of you know it?

Wesker, Jill, Rebecca, Claire, and Leon: No.

Sora: YAY I get to teach you.... ohh wait, Joshua I'll need you to help along with (looking around to see an anime doll and brings it to life) you.

Random Anime Doll: What do you need help with Oh Almighty Mistress (bows to Sora)

Sora: Do you know the Hare Hare Yukai?

Random Anime Doll: Why yes I do.

Sora: Good cuz I need help since there's three parts to the dance I need you to demonstrate the second part for Claire and Rebecca, I'll do Jill's part and Joshua does the male's part.

Random Anime Doll: Okies.

Sora: Alright people get in positition.... Wesker, Leon you two are on both sides of the girls, Jill you're in the middle, Claire and Rebecca you two are behind Jill but stay on the sides of her. You know like form a triangle and you all have to mirror mine, anime doll's and Joshua's movements, I will ask you all one last time before we start, do you know who to follow?

Wesker and Leon: Joshua.

Claire and Rebecca: The living doll?

Jill: You.

Sora: Correct! Now lets get started.

(Sora turns on the song Hare Hare Yukai and the six characters start dancing)

Wesker: I feel like an idiot.

Jill: Shut it Wesker

Chris: **This** is very entertaining to watch.

All RE Characters involved with the Hare Hare Yukai: BE QUIET CHRIS!!!

(By the time the dance is over everyone except Joshua, Sora, and the Random Anime Doll collapse from exhaustion)

Sora: Time for STARS to redo the whole mansion incident!

S.T.A.R.S: WHAT!?

Joshua: You heard the lady, get moving. (uses author powers to gear up the STARS Team and sends them to the rebuilt Arklay Mansion)

// Several hours later //

(All STARS members return and Wesker was a bloody mess)

Joshua: How was the mansion?

Jill: I hate you.

Joshua: Get in line

Sora: Wesker, while you were away I took the liberty of getting you a dog!

Wesker: umm.... how kind of you?

Sora: but you have to train him.

Wesker: that shouldn't be too difficult.

Sora: Come here Cerberus! (claps her hands and whistles to call an actual Cerberus)

All RE Characters: WTF?!

Joshua: You have to teach him tricks including "play dead"

Wesker: Great, just great.

Cerberus: (just stares at Wesker)

Wesker: (takes out a jar filled to the brim with bits of bloody meat, opens the lid, and takes out a piece) Lay down boy.

Cerberus: (lays down)

Wesker: Good boy (tosses the meat to the zombie dog and takes out another piece) Play dead.

Cerberus: (stands completely still and fall over on his side like a statue)

Joshua: That was pretty good.

Wesker: Thanks (tosses the meat to the Cerberus)

Jill: Sora, Joshua, where the hell am I going to find a zombie?

Joshua and Sora: Stew!!!

Stew: (groans and walks over to Sora and signs "What do you want it's my chapter off")

Sora: Jill has to kiss you, you still don't have to clean.... that's Alexia's job for one more chapter.

Stew: (looks at Jill with a lovestruck gaze)

Jill: Why is Stew staring at me like that.

Joshua: Uhh oh, Stew's in love with you!

Jill: What?!

Sora: That's what it looks like and you still have to kiss him for your dare.

Jill: **** (kisses Stew and runs to the bathroom to puke and wash her mouth out with soap)

Stew: (Victory arm pumps and moans what sounded like "Yeah")

Joshua: Stew, you can go back to your break and now Leon go on the show "Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?" and Wesker go on "Deal or No Deal"

FMB: I've never seen "Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?" and I've only seen "Deal or No Deal" once so I'm going to have to pass time by and I am still not going to participate. (disappears once more)

Wesker: This is going to be interesting (leaves to be on "Deal or No Deal")

Leon: I've always watched that show, but I never suspected that I'd be on it. (gets sent to the "Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?" studio by Joshua.)

// 2 hours later //

Leon: I lost to a ****ing fifth grader! (comes back steaming mad)

Wesker: I won "Deal or No Deal" (comes in with a suitcase full of money)

Sora: Congrats Wesker, and I'm sorry Leon, but on the bright side here's something funny (shoots Frost in the knee)

Frost: AAAAAAAAAH!!!! (falls to the ground holding his knee.)

Leon: (Chuckles)

Sora: Oops, ohh well time to send him to the doctor.

Rebecca: Me?

Sora: No, your a cop medic, what I have is a doctor doctor. (picks up Frost) Don't you worry Frost, the doctor I hired has the most gentlest touch.

Frost: THANK GOD!!! (screams in pain)

// In the studio clinic //

Sora: Patricia tell the doc that he has his first patient. (tells a little blonde curly haired child in a black and white lolita dress sitting behind a receptionists desk)

Patricia: yes ma'am (throws a small dagger at the wall behind her and presses a button to the intercom) Doctor your first patient is on his way.

Frost: Umm Sora... who exactly is this doctor? and why hire a child.

Sora: I'll tell you when you get done with the doctor. (leads Frost to a door labled "Doctor, First Aid Room") Just go right on in.

Frost: Alright (opens the door, hops in the room, and closes the door behind him.) WTF?! (sees a Tyrant in a sergeon's outfit and a Hunter in a female nurse's outfit)

Tyrant: (looks at Frost and stabs him in the head with his claws and cuts off his wounded leg) He's done.

Sora: (opens the door to see a bloody mess) ohh I knew I was right to hire you, but now I have to deliver bad news. (leaves the room)

// In the main room in the studio //

Sora: Resident Evil cast, I'm afraid to inform you that Frost is gone, there was nothing the doctor could do. (puts on a sad act and cried fake tears)

Wesker: You shot Frost in the knee, how could he die from being shot in the knee!

Sora: (smiles evily) I believe it's time to introduce you to our doctor, come on out Dr. T-002!

Wesker, Chris, Jill, Rebecca, and Barry: What did you just say?

(After Sora announced the Doc's name, the Tyrant Frost seen came out in the open all bloody and had a clean name tag labeled "Dr. T-002")

Wesker: holy **** (almost faints but succeeds in staying concious)

Joshua: Ohh that's what you mean by interviewing important people..... I can't believe you hired a Tyrant to be the doctor, I would've approved of the deranged chupacabras more if I'd known about him! (points at Dr. T-002)

Sora: But I'd already sent back that shipment of chupacabras back to Spain.

Joshua: (groans in annoyance and walks away)

Sora: last dare that spark of insanity has is that the whole RE cast dance to Stay Away by Larc en Ciel (brings back Frost who is running out of the studio clinic screaming)

Stew: (turns on the boom box and the song Stay Away plays)

Sora: Get to dancing!

RE Cast: (starts dancing to Stay Away along with Dr. T-002)

Joshua: Now that's over with our next dare is from residentwesker

_funny story you've written so far. I couldn't stop laughing. And about the dare thing, how about have wesker sit  
on a throne make out with jill, excella, and claire while chris licks weskers  
boots filled with cerberus "accidents" while admitting he's in love with  
alfred._

Wesker: I'm liking this dare already.

Sora: and you're lucky cuz I just specially ordered a thrown to your liking Wesker! (brings in a huge crate, opens it and reveals a medevil looking thrown)

Wesker: Thanks, (sits down and the first one he makes out with is Claire while Jill and Excella are sitting on the arm rests waiting to kiss Wesker)

Chris: This is so digusting (licks Wesker's boots with cerberus 'accidents' on it) and I'm in love with Alfred Ashford!

Wesker: My day can't get any better than this (makes out with Jill and Excella)

Joshua: Okay this sight is disturbing now our last dare is from Akako Hama, ohh this one should be good.

_Sora/Joshua: Take these metal sonic plushies. they will protect you. Do not  
let anyone take them_

_Chris: Are you afriad of the Tails Doll?_

_Sora: Tag Super Sonic with the Tails Doll on Sonic R. That is where the  
plushies come in he's afriad of Metal Sonic._

_Joshua: Let your licker instincts take over._

_Sora: You'll love this one. Stand behind Chris and say 'Can you feel the  
sunshine?'_

Sora: YAY I got a metal Sonic plushi! (hugs plushie)

Joshua: Uhh I'm not a fan of plushies. (holds the plushie with the tip of his claw)

Sora: Just keep it ohh and Chris are you afraid of the Tails Doll?

Chris: (gets as far away from Wesker as possible and washes his mouth out with minty mouthwash) Yes I'm afraid of that damn doll, its not normal for a doll that looks adorible to be so murderous!

Sora: You bore me, I gotta go play Sonic R (plays Tag Mode as the Tails Doll) Damn it Super Sonic let me tag you!!! (finally tags Super Sonic) YES VICTORY!!!!

Tails Doll: Can you feel the sunshine? (pops out of the TV and sees Sora and Joshua with Metal Sonic plushies)

Sora: Yes I can feel the sunshine but it brings me down and over there are souls you can take and people you can murder. (points to the RE Cast)

RE Cast: WHAT?!

Tails Doll: Yes, (takes all the RE Cast's souls and leaves)

Joshua: That was disturbing, why didn't the Tails Doll take our souls Sora?

Sora: Tails Doll is afaid of Metal Sonic, that's why Akako gave us Metal Sonic plushies.

Joshua: Ohh that explains it, now to bring back the RE Cast (returns all of the RE Cast's souls)

Chris: I hated that doll the first time.

Sora: (sees Joshua smile and laugh evily) Oh **** to the bomb shelter (jumps in a trash can)

Jill: Why did Sora jump in a trash can?

Joshua: FOOD!!!!!!!! (allows licker instincts take over and slaughters every living thing in sight)

// After the mass mayhem is over //

Sora: Is it safe to come out (sticks her head out of the trash can to see blood everywhere) wow Joshua, you really made a mess.

Joshua: Sorry, but it was sure fun.

Sora: (finds Chris' mutilated body, brings all RE cast back to life, stands behind Chris and whispers evily) Can you feel the sunshine?

Chris: AAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! No I don't feel the sunshine and I don't want to feel it! I love my soul! (Jumps a mile away from Sora) SORA!!! (now steaming mad)

Sora: Sorry Chris but I couldn't help it, I just had to do that. (laughing until she looks like she's crying)

Joshua: While Sora tries to stop herself from laughing the zombie dance team will close us out by dancing the Chicken Dance while wearing chicken suits. Hope you like this chapter, please send in more dares, the more dares the better the torture will be! Bye.

Alexia: Finally, one more chapter and I'm free of cleaning (begins cleaning the entire studio)

Zombie Dance Team: (wearing green chicken suits and starts dancing the Chicken Dance when the music starts playing and the spotlight hits them)


	9. Chapter 9

**Diclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil Capcom does, nor do I own the characters from Silent Hill or Sonic, all I own is Sora, Joshua, the zombie preist and Stew... Only Akako Hama can borrow the zombies and my characters.**

Sora: DAMNIT WESKER LET ME DEFEAT YOU ALREADY.......NO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOOOO! SHEVA SAVE ME!! (screaming at a big plasma screen tv playing RE5 and pressing the B button causing Chris in the game to call for help but dies a few seconds later then turns to the actual Sheva) I HATE YOU!!!!!! (shoots Sheva with her dual magnums) Why did I have to play Pro? I must've died like 93 times.

Joshua: No you died 199 times, that's 156 more deaths FMB didn't have to face on her game.

Sora: WHAT?! That means she died 43 times in chapter 5-3!

Joshua: But I hope you do know that most of her deaths were caused by Jill, Wesker only killed FMB six times throughout that whole chapter, my licker brethren killed FMB once and Jill took the remainder of the deaths.

Sora: Damn she's good. But now lets get started with the dares! (turns off the game and revives Sheva) We have a dare from LDLR.....this should be good now that she has Allen with her.

_Lily:*hugs Allen then laughs*see Allen dying In funny ways is fun!  
Allen:*laughs also* ya so what are we going to dare today?  
Moonya:Yes! I got a servant forever! And Krauser it worst when I fight ya  
without anything  
Me and Allen *sweatdrops * okiesdare nummber one I dare every one to Eat chu's  
cooking  
In a time limit she has REALY REALLY BIG FEAST! for ya guys and but the way I  
hope ya guys don't get killed  
Allen:dad I dare ya to kill your self while saying WHY! for 1 day and then  
confess your feelings to the one ya love in a funny way!  
Moonya I dare everyone else to dance against silent hill characters! If  
resident chars lose to them they have to give up there most prized possesion  
same thing to the others!_

Sora: We get food!

Chris: But we have to eat it in a time limit

Joshua: Which I had found out that the time limit is 15 minutes and it's a huge feast, a feast like a king would have.

Jill: Thats a lot of food.

Rebecca: Well lets dig in

// 15 minutes later //

Chris: I can't eat another bite (falls out of his chair and dies from over stuffing his stomache)

Rebeccca: I think I'm going to be sick (tries to run to the bathroom but ends up throwing up on the floor)

Alexia: DAMN IT REBECCA I JUST CLEANED THAT FLOOR!!!! (sets Rebecca on fire and cleans up the mess)

Frost: (lets out a huge and loud burp)

Sora: (laughs) Awesome, that belch gets a 10. (sees everyone stare at her) What? Is it so wrong for a girl to rate burps?

Jill: No but it may seem abnormal for a girl to do that.

Sora: Well technically I'm a tomboy so it is normal for me to do that.

Joshua: Back to LDLRs dares...... Wesker your son Allen wants you to kill yourself while screaming "WHY!" for one day and then confess your feelings to the one you love in a funny way.

Wesker: (finds a double bladed chainsaw but first dresses up like a giant double heart) Claire baby I love you, I don't care if your brother hates me, he will never kill the love I have for you.

Sora: I'm disturbed (slowly backs away from Wesker) though its good to know that you know where to find Super Dr Salvador's double chainsaw.

Barry: Uhh Sora, isn't that a bad thing?

Sora: Good, bad, doesn't make a difference to me just as long as me or Joshua gets hurt.

Salazar: Isn't that good to know.

Joshua: Shut it midget

Wesker: WHY! (screams at random and hacks himself to bits)

Alexia: I hate you! (grabs a mop and clean water with cleaning solution mixed in and starts cleaning up the bloody mess)

Joshua: Now all you RE characters must compete in a dance competition against the characters of Silent Hill

Sora: Does LDLR mean the human characters or the monster characters?

Kenneth: What monsters?

Joshua: the dare just says dance against the Silent Hill characters and whoever loses has to give up their most prized possession.

Frost: I hope we have to dance against the human characters cuz the monsters creep me out.

Joshua: I guess you have to dance against the human characters.

Forest: phew thank god for that, I've played and watched Silent Hill and those creatures are down right creepy.... especially the Pyramid Heads.

Sora: TIME TO DANCE!!! (puts in a CD in the sterio and the first song that plays is "Dreams of an Absolution")

Joshua: Sora, change the song.

Sora: Killjoy (changes the song to a song from Souljaboy) I'll be listening to "Dreams of an Absolution"

Joshua: You've become obsessed with that song!

Sora: Yes I have so let the characters get to dancing.

Krauser: You heard the lady, lets get to dancing.

(Then all of a sudden a strange fog rolls in the studio and the Silent Hill characters appear out of the fog but then the song changes to "Promise (Reprise)")

Sora: (looks at her watch) Right on time SH characters.

(As Promise was playing the Silent Hill human characters were doing an interperative dance thus leaving the RE characters wondering about their dance and how they arrived.)

Saddler: nice interperative dance, the song fitted very nicely.

Random Ganado: Whose side are you on Lord Saddler? (then gets impaled by Saddler)

Sora: Wow now that the ganado has been gifted with death RE characters show those Silent Hill characters who's boss!

HUNK: With pleasure (walks over to the sterio and changes the song to "I Am Fury")

*A/N: I don't know who sings that song I heard it on House of the Dead and I thought it would be a good song*

Joshua: before you start dancing here's Chris and Rebecca back me and Sora almost forgot to revive them. (revives Chris and Rebecca)

Chris: Hey I like this song.

Barry: Good cuz we got to dance to this song to beat those Silent Hill people. (points to a group of characters with a child mixed in the group)

Rebecca: Oookay

(As "I Am Fury" continues to play many of the RE characters start dancing to the song until its over)

Sora: I have to admit, I loved the Silent Hill character's dance better.

RE Cast: WHAT?!

Joshua: That's final Silent Hill wins, RE cast give up your prized possession

RE Cast: (gives miscellanious items to the Silent Hill cast and after giving them the items they disappear back into the fog.)

Sora: Now that's finished our next dare is from........ HOSHI!!!!!

Wesker: My cousin reviewed?

Sora: Yes this is a very good day when Hoshi decides to send in dares and now here it is.

_Hi, Akako is not here so I Hoshi am taking over._

Wesker: HI COUSIN ALBERT! Just because you are family does not mean you are  
safe. Meet my army of yaoi fangir- I mean evil. They will not hurt you if you  
tell them I'm your cousin. Also I got control of Tails Doll. I run TriCell  
through him. Oh tell Tails Doll I'm family.

Excella: I now demote you to janitor, no wait, you must clean up after all  
experaments. And meet Tails Doll again.

Chris: Meet me in a warehouse with a cup of coffee, you cannot leave and must  
give me the coffee. The building will explode, but the world will be safe.

Sora: HI! Look at Tails he's being adoable.

Frost: I WILL KILL YOU FOR FLIRTING WITH ME! I have told Rouge that there is  
a giant daimond in your stomach, she is coming to cut it out.

Alexia: Clean up this mess! (Throws dead bodies on floor and lets loose and  
angry Veronica with infinate guns) Have fun and if you come after me well-  
(Aims ten nukes at her)

Bye

Wesker: She's deffinetely my cousin if she shows no mercy even to family, I'm actually proud and shocked all at the same time.

Hoshi's Yoai Fangirl Army: It's Albert Wesker, our almighty leader's cousin! (appeared out of nowhere)

Joshua: And she runs Tricell through the Tails Doll along with having an army of yao..... I mean evil fangirl army at her command.

Excella: I tried so hard to get to where I am and I lose my position because of a crazy woman and a stuffed animal?!

Sora: Don't diss the Tails Doll! Since your demoted to janitor go clean up the expermentation room, all the lickers are gone.

Excella: Fine (takes a mop and bucket into a white sterilized room and then got slashed to shreds by a licker that was still in the room.)

Joshua: Oops there was still one in there.

Sora: Ohh well not my loss and Chris what year were you born in?

Chris: Why do you need to know?

Sora: So I can finish your headstone. (finished engraving CHRISTOPHER REDFIELD into the headstone along with being a good brother, excellent soldier, and good son and today's date.)

Chris: SORA?!

Sora: Are you going to tell me or not?

Chris: NO!

Sora: Claire when was your idiot brother born?

Claire: He was born in 1973.

Chris: Claire, why did you have to tell her?

Joshua: Chris, here's your cup of joe and go meet Hoshi. (Hands Chris a large cup of caffinated coffee)

Chris: Thanks (takes the coffee and leaves the studio)

**// At an abandoned warehouse //**

Chris: Hoshi? (walks in the building and hears the door slam behind him) I'm here to deliver your coffee.

Hoshi: Give it to me. (appears in front of Chris and holds out her hand for the coffee)

Chris: Here (gives her the coffee)

Hoshi: Thanks (almost takes a sip) You really shouldn't have done that. (chugs all of the coffee then starts twitching) WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**// Back at the Studio //**

(An explosion was heard in the studio and it shook the building, Sora quickly turned on the news to see that a warehouse blew up and had sent a flaming ball towards a nearby Starbucks.)

Wesker: How much sugar was in that coffee?

Sora: It was the coffee that had the most caffine in it.

Wesker: Sora..... aren't you afraid that Hoshi will come here sugar high?

Sora: Ohh crap!

Hoshi: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (enters the studio and destroys everything in sight)

Sora: To the bomb shelter! (Sora and Joshua jump in the trashcan)

Wesker: If Sora was able to be undetected by Joshua when his licker instincts were in control then Hoshi wouldn't be able to find me in there (goes inside the trashcan to find himself in a bomb shelter stocked up on food, water, entertainment, and extra clothing.)

Joshua: Wesker what the hell are you doing here?

Wesker: Hiding from my cousin.

Sora: Joshua deal with it, we just gotta wait here until Hoshi passes out but until then Wesker have a seat and join me and Joshua in playing the Mercenaries. (hands Wesker a pure black Xbox 360 controller)

// After some time playing RE5 Mercenaries //

Sora: (pauses the game and goes to the ladder leading out of the bomb shelter and listens closely) I don't hear a thing so I think it's safe to go up now.

Joshua: Just when we could've gotten a SS rank in the Prison.

Wesker: (just climbs up the ladder to find his cousin sleeping with a blue hedgehog in one arm and a black and red angry hedgehog in the other and cuddling a rocket laucher)

Sora and Joshua: (exit the shelter to see all the RE cast massacred) Damn Hoshi's good. (revives all the RE characters)

Wesker: Should you two do something about this.

Shadow: Help me (weakly cried trying to get out of Hoshi's death grip) I think my hand is near the trigger to the launcher (accidentally pulls the trigger and the warhead fires and hits Chris in the happy place)

Chris: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! (dies and his lower half is missing)

Sora: That was cool and entertaining (revives Chris) Shadow's so adorible but I know a way to wake her up... HOSHI THERE'S YAOI!!!

Hoshi: Yaoi? Where!? (looking around) Hey cousin Albie, now where's my yaoi?

Wesker: Yaoi?

(Then all of a sudden Tails the Fox appears on the stage and makes a cute face then sneezes thus falling on his butt and his tails are over his head.)

Sora: AWWWW, CAN'T RESIST, MUST HUG CUTENESS!!!!!! (jumps onto the stage and hugs Tails like he's a plushie)

Joshua: Sora, don't kill the Sonic character! (jumps onto the stage to try to pry Tails away from Sora but fails) Sora look! Wesker and Leon without their shirts! (points to Wesker and Leon then quickly tears off the men's shirts)

Sora: (looks to see Wesker and Leon shirtless and starts drooling on poor Tails) Soo hot.

Leon: This is somewhat awkward.

Wesker: You're telling me.

Rouge: Give me that gem (takes a surgical knife and cuts open Frost's stomache to pull out a pretty and big diamond) Hello my precious brilliant let me take you home and clean you up (cuddles the gem and goes back to Akako's fic)

Joshua: That was somewhat gruesome, (sees Chris in a panicked state) Chris what's wrong?

Chris: Sora didn't revive me completely!

Sora: Sorry I couldn't fix your happy place..... ohh well time to see the doctor! You too Frost.

Frost and Chris: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!! (Gets dragged to the doctors office by Sora)

(Upon entering the waiting room Chris and Frost see Salazar waiting in a seat with a bloody leg)

Chris: We're gonna die Frost.

Frost: Let's just hope its the quick and painless kind. (sits down next to Salazar) What happened to you?

Salazar: Broken leg, I managed to escape Hoshi's sugar rush only with this injury.

Patricia: Salazaryou'reupnext! (throws a syringe with glowing yellow liquid in it and just barely missed Salazar's head)

Salazar: (hops into the doctor's office) What the hell are you? AHHHHH!!!!!

Dr. T-002: (stabs Salazar in the gut and threw him out the roof, then presses a button)

Patricia: (looks on her desk to see a red screen light up reading "Send in Next Victim") Christimetoseethedoctor! (Throws a spatula and Chris gets it stuck in his arm)

Chris: DAMN IT!!! (pulls the spatula out of his arm and walks into the office) Doc, I just need a simple surgery so there's no need to.... (sees a hunter in a female nurses uniform) Is that a Hunter?

Hunter Nurse: (Gurgles "I'm a guy but that hostess made me wear a female nurses outfit")

Chris: What? (couldn't understand the Hunter but then gets impaled by Dr.T-002 in the head)

Dr.T-002: Send in the next patient.

Patricia: You'relastFrost! (throws a giant machete at Frost)

Frost: (barely dodged the machete and runs into the office and sees a hole in the ceiling and Chris' dead carcase on the floor.) ohh god help me

Dr. T-002: Welcome to your worst nightmare (mutates his right arm and impales Frost in the gut.... or whats left of it.)

(Back with the rest of the RE Cast, Joshua got a call from Patricia telling him that Salazar, Chris and Frost are dead.)

Joshua: Sora, I'm glad you took time out of your schedule to get the tyrant for a doctor, the hunter for a nurse and the little girl as a receptionist.

Sora: Yep I'm glad too and....(looks at her watch) Joshua uhhh its time to hide somewhere.

Joshua: Why?

Sora: A trigger happy hedgehog is coming for Alexia's dare.

Hoshi: (throws dead bodies all over the place and brings in her angry trigger happy co-hostess Veronica)

Alexia: NOOO!!!!!! (watches as Veronica goes trigger happy with infinite guns and more dead bodies appearing.)

Veronica: (stops after 10 minutes of shooting and heads back to the sonic fic)

Hoshi: This is the last dare and before I forget, (Tosses Shadow and Sonic to the yaoi fangirl army) Enjoy my army!

Yaoi Fangirl Army: YAY (Takes Shadow and Sonic and leaves to do unspeakable things to them)

Wesker: (jaw drops and goes wide eyed) What?!

Hoshi: What? I have an army of yaoi fangirls, so what.

Wesker: (almost faints then starts babbling incoherently)

Hoshi: It's time for me to leave, bye cousin Albie. (Leaves the fic and goes back to her own along with her fangirl army)

Joshua: Now onto our next dare from LDLR

_Part 2 of me dares  
Lily: hey guys Allen is sleeping since tuckered him out by making go through  
an obstacle course that has to be completed under 10 mins it took him several  
tries but he improved greatly  
So here is me final dare you guys have to complete this course UNDER FIVE  
MINUTES me family can do under 10 seconds cause we are trained too here is the  
obstacle course ya guys have to swim through dangerous things in fester water  
then ya guys have to fight a random beast that you fear the most and then you  
guys gotta run through the jungle and then ya guys got to grab a flag it's  
different colored then ya guys have to go through that again with the flag  
intact well that's all oh ya! Me forgot I dare Joshua to date a person he  
likes it can be anyone! But some one has to follow them! But do try to not get  
caught me character is a martial arts master and she can whoop your but in 5  
seconds_

Sora: This is going to be fun (giggling evily)

Sheva: But aren't you worried about our safety if we do go through this course.

Sora: Yes and no, I'll just be worried about Wesker and Leon.

Joshua: Lets get going to the jungle where the course is placed.

**// In the jungle somewhere in the Amazon //**

Jill: It's so humid here (wiping sweat off her forehead)

Claire: Yeah it is, and these damn mosquitos keep bitting me! (slapping her arms left and right.)

Chris: This is almost worse than Africa

Sheva: Africa's heat is worse than the humidity here but thanks to the humidity the insect population grows and there are more carnivorous animals here.

Wesker: That's good to know Ms. Alomar. (not even breaking a sweat even though he is in his black leather combat outfit)

Richardo: Boss, how is it you can stand this heat in leather?

Wesker: The virus in me is regulating my body temperature so this humidity isn't affecting me whatsoever.

Joshua: Lucky (using his licker tongue to fan himself with a paper fan)

Sora: I hate humid weather it makes me feel sticky. Are we there yet?

Chris: Don't you dare start that!

Jill: I swear if you do that I will toss you over the next cliff we pass.

Sheva: Why does "Are we there yet?" annoy you guys so much.

Leon: It's simple Sheva, when a person says that phrase one too many times it can easily get on someone's nerves because one can get tired of hearing that.

Sheva: Ohh.

Excella: I hate it here, can we please leave this place.

Sora: WE'RE HERE!! (moves a set of huge leaves out of the way to reveal a huge obstical course.)

Chris: Sora, could you tell us what's in the water? (looking in the murky water.)

Sora: Umm I don't know exactly.... let me see (dives in the water)

Joshua: NO!! SORA!!! (runs to the edge of the water and tries to look for Sora)

(Then in the middle of the lake Sora comes up with a piranha flopping on her head)

Sora: There are piranhas in the water.... along with aligators, phythons, and mutated turtles.

RE Cast: GET OUT OF THE WATER!!!!!!!

Sora: But the water's nice.

Joshua: If you don't get out of that water I will personally fish you out!

Sora: Fine, I'm coming in (swims back to shore)

(When Sora got back to shore the RE Cast was given a color so they could go out to get their flags. Wesker: Black, Chris: Green, Jill: Blue, Claire: Red, Leon: Yellow, Sheva: Brown, Richardo: Gray, Excella: White)

Joshua: Alright everyone time for the race, you all know your colors and now begin the race..... you all have less than five minutes to complete this.

Wesker: Excellent (cracks his knuckles and takes his position at the starting line.)

Chris: There is no way that any of us can survive this.

Sheva: This is sheer madness.

Claire: I am so not liking this.

Leon: Neither am I

Joshua: GO!! (fires off a gun signaling the cast to begin the course.)

(After the gun went off Wesker takes the lead until the phython decided to try to eat Wesker in the infested waters, Chris began wrestling a gator, Claire was getting bitten by the pirahnas along with Jill, Excella was having a hard time getting through the water, Richardo was swimming through the water with ease until the turtles decided to attack and Leon was also wrestling a gator doing the death roll.)

Richardo: Owowowowowow (gets pulled under then comes up above the water with turtles stuck to his nose, ears and lip.)

Excella: Richardo, help me! (being dramatic as she gets further and further behind.)

Richardo: No way Excella (swims away from the woman and gets to shore second to last)

(During the random beast fight Wesker had to fight off a giant spider, Chris fought Barney, Claire tried to ahhnialate a unicorn, Jill against a giant wasp, Sheva pitted against an river croc, Leon had to fight a deranged anaconda, Richardo had to face a mutant fish and Excella had to fight a scaly beast (Hoshi in demon form and on a sugar rush))

Excella: What the hell is this. (looking at the human like dragon demon twitching uncontrollably.)

Sora: uhh Excella, that's a demon on a sugar rush (says to Excella on a bullhorn)

Excella: I hate scaly things, do I really have to fight it?

Everyone: YES!!!

Hoshi (Demon Form): (Kills Excella and disappears)

(Excella, Richardo, and Sheva were killed by their beasts while Wesker, Chris, Claire, Jill ((with really bad stings)), and Leon ((just barely made it)) successfully survived. Then after the beasts were defeated Wesker grabbed his flag and put it in his glove, Chris stuffed his flag in his pocket, Claire rolled her up and stuffed it in her mouth when no one was looking, Jill placed hers in her sock and Leon hid his flag in his shoe and went through that obsticle once again and finished the course with only 1.11 seconds left to spare.)

Sora: How did everyone do? Claire... where's your flag?

Claire: (sticks out the tip of the flag from her mouth then pulls the whole thing out.) Hey the flag had to stay intact LDLR didn't say exactly how to keep the flag intact.

Joshua: Good point, Chris, Jill, Wesker, Leon?

Wesker: (pulled his flag from his glove)

Chris: (tried to get his flag out from his pocket but only succeeded in ripping it)

Jill: (Gently took her flag out from her sock)

Leon: I lost my flag thanks to those gators taking my shoes

Sora: Sorry Leon and Chris but you lost this obsticle course.

Leon and Chris: Damn (starts sulking)

Joshua: Hey Sora since this obsticle course dare is over how about you and I go out on a date?

Sora: (wide eyed) uhh I don't know,

Joshua: Please Sora, it's my dare, you know what my dare is and I chose you. (now on his knees)

Sora: But Joshua.......

Jill: Sora just go on a date with him. He's already on his knees and he's really desperate.

Sora: Fine. But ya'll are finding your own way home. (uses author powers to send her and Joshua back to the states)

RE Cast: WHAT?!

**// At a movie theater //**

Sora: I did not expect you to take me to the movies,

Joshua: Well yeah, going to the movies is actually a nice break from tormenting the RE Cast.

Sora: We left some of them in the Amazon to find their own way home but lets go see a movie! (looking at the billboards showing what movies are playing)

Joshua: How about Night of Dead Reckoning? I hear its a good zombie movie.

Sora: I heard the same thing, lets go see it.

(A/N: Night of Dead Reckoning is something I made up, it's not a real movie though I do wish that those movie writers would come out with a great zombie movie)

Ada: (wearing her trademark red dress with the butterfly on it and goes to follow Sora and Joshua without being detected)

// 2 hours later //

Joshua: That was more gore than I needed to see in my lifetime.

Sora: What are you saying Joshua? That was the perfect amount of gore, bloodshed, and heavy artillery violence, the movie deserves a 10 for the perfection.

Ada: I'm.... going to..... (gags) be sick (runs out of the theater and to the bathroom)

Sora: (sees the woman run to the bathroom to upchuck) Wimp (eats the remainder of her popcorn)

Joshua: (puts his disguise back on and leaves the theater with Sora) I have to give those writers some credit making zombies intelligent enough to properly use guns was interesting especially the virus infecting every single animal.

Sora: That was pretty cool, but now's the time to go back to the studio and hope that Chris, Jill, Claire, Wesker, Leon, Richardo, and Excella made it back okay.

Joshua: Fine (uses author powers to go back to the studio)

**// In the Studio //**

(When Sora and Joshua get back to the studio they find the rest of the RE cast watching a TV)

Sora: Whatcha watchin? (looks at the TV to see Chris, Jill, Claire and Leon in war paint) WTF?!

Sherry: Claire and Leon are going crazy from lack of civilization

Sergei: Its not a surprise to see Redfield and Valentine like this but why isn't that black cockroach panicking?

William: Albert's used to being lost in the wilderness, when we were younger we always went camping without the neccessary equipment and end up fending for ourselves for weeks on end.

Annette: You never told me about that, who was with you? (getting red in the face with anger)

William: It was just me and Al, I swear to you baby those camping trips were when me and Al were in the training facility and were teenagers.

Annette: William Birkin you better not be lying to me or else you'll regret the day you ever went on those camping trips.

**// Somewhere in the Amazon //**

Chris: Team, even though we lost three people we still can survive this maddness, the only obsticle in our path is _**Wesker**_ (eye twitching like a maniac)

Leon: We must take him out before we can find civilization.

Jill: You're absolutely right.

Claire: (leaves the group and walks off to find civilization)

(After Claire comes back she sees Chris, Leon, and Jill in a net suspended from a tree and Wesker eating a piece of fruit while laying against a tree)

Claire: What happened here? (putting down a few bottles and a giant leaf full of various fruits)

Wesker: Your idiot brother and his posse tried to capture me but they were no match for me.

Claire: Chris.

Chris: Claire help us, get us down from here so we can get rid of Wesker.

Claire: No way! Albert lets get out of here, I think I heard boats near here. (begins to walk away from the area)

Wesker: That's the best news I heard all day (follows Claire, leaving Chris, Leon and Jill)

Jill and Leon: WAIT!! DON'T LEAVE US!!!!

// a few hours later //

Leon: Thanks for taking us with you Wesker.

Wesker: Don't get used to it Mr. Kennedy because once we get back to the studio we're back to being enemies.

Jill: Lets hope that when we get back to the studio Chris will get back to normal. (dragging a tied up Chris behind her)

Claire: If not Sora's probably going to send him to the doctor.

Chris: (babling about Wesker taking over the world and chimpanzees going berserk on innocent people)

Wesker: I will not release chimpanzees on people, though I don't know about Hoshi

Chris: Hoshi's an evil yaoi fangirl.

Wesker: Hoshi's not an evil yaoi fangirl

(All of a sudden Hoshi in demon form appears looking like she was angry with hunger and sugar high)

Demon Hoshi: DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (pounces on him and eats his head)

Jill: S*** (tries to run but gets torn in half vertically by the demon Hoshi)

Leon: Claire, Wesker run!!! (get stabbed in the chest)

Wesker: Come on Clai......... (all of a sudden gets a heart thrown at him and sees Claire's dead body on the ground)

Demon Hoshi: (curiously looks at Wesker, walks over to him and conveniently passes out and cuddles him like she did with Sonic and Shadow)

(After Demon Hoshi passes out Wesker found a boat and came back to the states and found the studio but once he entered the studio he seen that it was his cousin holding onto him and not the scaly demon)

**// Back in the Studio //**

Wesker: Wasn't there a demon holding onto me a second ago.

Sora: That demon was Hoshi in costume (revives everyone that had gotten killed in the obsticle course and at the hands of Demon Hoshi)

Leon: Ow (clutches his chest) why the hell does my chest hurt?

Wesker: The demon Excella had to fight stabbed you in the chest with it's bare hand

Leon: Damn

Hoshi: Hey cousin Albert..... why do I smell blood?

Sora: Cuz you in a demon costume killed Leon, Claire, Chris, and Jill

Hoshi: I DON'T KILL HUMANS!!!!

Sora: Shall I replay the evidence (rewinds the TV to replay Hoshi in demon form killing the four people in the group)

Hoshi: I'm sorry (leaves back to her fic feeling guilty)

Joshua: Now that's done our next dare is from The True One.

_Hey I got a dare for you I dare Wesker Chris and three other people you can  
choose them dance the Hare Hare Yukai in front of the whole world and the SOS  
brigade they have to say its perfect for you to stop and let me tell you this  
its not easy pleasing a goddess_

Sora: I'm already loving this dare, I got the perfect outfits for Wesker, Chris and three other people.

Chris: What is it?

Sora: (pulls out a school girl's uniform) Ta-da!!

Wesker: Those are for the girls..... right?

Joshua: You wish it was for the girls but for this dare there are no girls just all guys.

Chris: WHAT?!

Sora: Wesker, Chris, Luis, Salazar, and Alfred get over here and put on these uniforms!! (tosses five school girl uniforms to the guys)

Salazar: I hate you.

Sora: Get in line. Now dance and smile for the camera over there (points to a camera broadcasting to the entire world and starts the music)

Wesker, Chris, Luis, Salazar, and Alfred: (begin dancing to the Hare Hare Yukai after putting on the uniform)

Luis: This is humiliating

Chris and Wesker: Deal with it, we've done this the first time.

Alfred: This isn't too bad, I wore my sister's dress.

Chris: That's because you're a cross-dressing, split personality infected freak!

Alfred: I resent that Redfield.

Chris: I don't give a crap.

SOS Brigade: We seen you dance the Hare Hare Yukai, you can stop (turns off the music after the RE group danced for a few hours straight)

Luis, Salazar, and Alfred: THANK YOU (collapse on the floor)

Wesker: Weaklings (walks off to take off the uniform)

Sora: That was gold (replays the guys doing the Hare Hare Yukai on the big plasma screen) also our next dares are from Christian-Anne Redfield

_Hey thanks for putting my dare! I really appreciated it!  
Here are set for more dares:  
I Dare Dr. Salvador to chain saw wesker.  
I Dare Leon to date my sister maycie.  
I Dare Chis to say I lost my sister to my nemesis and make ways to prevent  
his sister dating, kissing or doing anything with wesker. hehehehe  
I dare wesker and claire to spend time together in the whole chapter.  
I Dare all girls resident evil characters to have a tea party with alfred,  
chris and wesker. hehehe that's all for now.  
I love your story keep it up!_

Sora: YAY DR. SALVADOR IS COMING!!!

Claire: Is he another doctor you hired?

Rebecca: Please say no

Joshua: Of course not, he's a plagas infected chainsaw man.

Billy: Why is he here

Sora: To saw Wezzy into pieces

Claire: NO! Wesker run!!!

Dr. Salvador: (revs the chainsaw and runs after Wesker)

(After about thirty minutes of dodging the chainsaw Wesker got distracted long enough for Wesker to get sawed in half)

Claire: NO! (cries over Wesker)

Sora: Claire..... you forgot I can bring him back (snaps her fingers and Wesker is revived and intact)

Claire: WESKER! (glomps Wesker)

Chris: I lost my sister to my nemesis.... Claire stay away from him (tries to pry his little sister off of Wesker but fails and still continues to pull)

Maycie: Leon time to go on our date! (appears in the studio and receives a glare from Sora) What?

Sora: If you try to steal Leon I will not like it.

Joshua: Enjoy your date you two (sends the two out of the studio for their date)

Sherry: Time to have a tea party! (is dressed in a powder blue dress)

Jill, Rebecca, and all other girls of RE: (gets an awkward feeling because they haven't had a tea party since they were kids)

Sherry: Come on it'll be fun and I already got dresses for you and tuxes for the guys! (pulls out a clothing rack with an assortment of dresses and tuxes)

(After the RE cast gotten dressed Sherry had gotten the tea set out and had an assortment of snacks and everyone took their seats, Chris had quickly made sure that Wesker and Claire were unable to sit together)

Claire: Chris.........could you please move elsewhere. (clenching her fists under the table and tempted to punch her brother in the jaw)

Chris: Not likely sis.

Wesker: Move or else you'll get your arms and legs broken and to get them fixed you'll have to see Dr. T-002.

Chris: (starts to quiver in fear) I-I...w-w-won't...m-move.

Wesker: suit yourself (cracks his knuckles)

Chris: (quickly runs to the other side of the table)

Jill: Coward (sips her tea)

Sherry: Cookies anyone? (holding out a plate of freshly baked cookies)

Chris: Sure (takes a cookie with a shakey hand)

Rebecca: (takes a cookie and eats it) Mmmm, who made these, these cookies are soo delicious that they practically melted in my mouth.

Sherry: My mom made them..... after she finished yelling at dad for not telling her about the camping trips he had with Uncle Albert when they were teens.

Wesker: Remind me to talk to your father after this Sherry, I never repaid him for getting us lost over 52 times in the wilderness.

Sherry: What are you going to do to my dad.

Wesker: Just catch up on our days of youth and make sure he never suggests going on a camping trip ever again. (drinks some of his tea)

// 30 minutes later //

Alfred: Ms. Redfield, I'm quite shocked that you can actually have such elegant manners for a ruffian.

Claire: Watch it you cross-dressing freak.

Alexia: Ms. Redfield, I'll advise you not to speak to my brother like that.

Annette: Sherry, tea party's over.

Sherry: Okay, I hope you had fun. (starts cleaning the table and washes the dishes)

Claire: Sora, do you know any methods to make sure Chris doesn't know I'm with Albert.

Sora: Yep, just use my emergency soundproof room. Its the last room past the doctor's office and here (hands Claire a silver pass) just flash that pass when you pass by the doctor cuz if you don't Patricia will think you're a patient.

Claire: okay and this pass works for two people.

Sora: Yep but when you're done being with Wesker give me my pass back.

Claire: You got it. (leaves the main room of the studio with Albert)

Joshua: I hoped you enjoyed this chapter, please RxR.

Sora: Unfortunately the zombie dance team is out with a new strain of virus that has crippled them so they're seeing Dr. T-002 who I told to be gentle with them but they'll be back to business whenever the doctor is finished with them, bye bye. (waves bye)

**A/N: Sorry it took me so long to post up this chapter, I have school and also I kept getting distracted by everything around me but I'll try to post more often.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil, all I own are my OCs and the Zombie priest and janitor Stew.**

Sora: We have dare, YAY!!!!

Joshua: This dare is from Zombiegirl2007, Billy prepare yourself and Rebecca you might want to leave the room.

Rebecca: Why.

Joshua: Here's the dare.

_Jill get to chase the Nemesis around Raccoon City with his rocket launcher  
scream Bow while chasing him after she done you guys are having a wedding for  
me and billy. Sora is my Maid Honor Wesker is the Best man Claire,Jill,Ada are  
bride maids Krauser,Chris,Leon are Grooms Men. The Flower girls are Sherry and  
Lucia and Lily and the ring bearer is Salazar me and billy are going to adopt  
him as are first child i don't care it 20. oh josh didn't forget you your my  
limo driver and you have to keep Rebbecca from destroying the wedding . My pet  
cat Weston will be at the wedding and i would like to adopt a licker and  
Colmillos and anyone who try to mess up my wedding will have to make out with  
El Gigante_

Rebecca: A WEDDING!!??

Sora: Yep but first Jill...... here's Nemmy's rocket launcher (hands Jill Nemesis' RL) Go have fun chasing Nemesis with his RL all over Raccoon City, fortunately it was rebuilt so go have loads of fun.

Jill: Gladly (preps the RL) PAYBACK NEMESIS!!!

Nemesis: (looks frightened)

Sora: (uses authoress powers to send Jill and Nemesis to the new Raccoon City)

**// New Raccoon City //**

Jill: Since I'm such a good sport Nemesis, I'll give you ten seconds to run for your life. (makes sure that the RL was loaded)

Nemesis: (runs as fast as he could away from Jill)

Jill: 1...2...10! Run Nemmy! RUN!! (Chases Nemesis) Bow!!

(All over Raccoon City Jill was firing off the RL at Nemesis but what she didn't know what that Sora had switched out the RL with an infinite one so Jill pratically went trigger happy on Nemmy and the whole city. After the whole city was demolished Jill and an extremely injured Nemesis left the city and back to the studio)

**// Back in the Studio //**

Sora: Hey welcome back, and Jill you made the top of the news story (turns on the news to show Jill about her rampage on the city meaning to go after Nemesis.)

Jill: Sorry I couldn't help it, the launcher didn't run out of ammo so I took that to my advantage but somehow I kept missing him.

Sora: Yeah I know how you feel, but now time to prepare for Zombiegirl2007's wedding (snaps her fingers and the main room of the studio is transformed into a wedding chapel)

Zombie Priest: Sora you better have this wedding prepared.

Sora: Don't worry I got it under control (uses authoress powers to put herself, Claire, Jill, and Ada in dresses then gets out a walkie talkie) Joshua, you got the bride to be?

Joshua: Yes I got the bride to be just make sure Rebecca is under control and the Best Man along with the grooms men are dressed

Sora: Got it, over and out (hangs up the walkie) Grooms men get dressed, groom to be get in your tux now!

Billy: I hate you

Sora: Great there's a club that hates me and I think they're giving out leather jackets to new recruits..... I want a jacket!

Jill: Are you really going to allow Billy to be married to his fangirl?

Sora: All will be answered before the vows. (grins like the Cheshire Cat from American McGee's Alice)

Sherry: Mommy, Sora's scaring me! (hides behind her parents)

Annette: Sora will you please not scare my daughter.

Sora: I'm sorry but I'm afraid that it's not going to be possible since all is going according to plan

All RE cast: WHAT PLAN?!

Sora: All will soon know. (chuckles evily and still smiling like the Cheshire Cat)

All RE Cast: (steps away from Sora and those in the wedding got in their posistion.)

Sora: Wait Billy come here for a second.

Billy: (walks over to Sora whose in a dark shadowy corner) What do you want?

Sora: I want to show you this, it's a dare from Tyrant Wolf and Alex (hands Billy the card with the dare on it)

Billy: Will I hate you more for this.

Sora: No Tyrant Wolf want to crash the wedding.

Billy: When will TW be here?

Sora: She'll be here when the priest asks if anyone opposes to the marriage.

Billy: okay.

Sora: NOW GET IN POSITION!! (screamed in his ear)

(After Billy got up to the altar Joshua finally showed up with Zombiegirl2007 in a miraculous wedding gown and the song "Here Comes the Bride" starts playing.)

Richard: Just calm down Rebecca, no need to get upset about this. (patting a duck-taped Rebecca on the shoulder)

Zombie Priest: Do you Zombiegirl2007 take Billy Coen as your lawful wedded husband, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?

Zombiegirl2007: I do

Zombie Priest: And do you Billy Coen, do you take Zombiegirl2007 as your lawful wedded wife in sickness and in health till death do you part?

Billy: I....I....I...(get jabbed in the side by the bride to be) I do (weakly spoke)

Zombie Priest: Now does anyone oppose to this union, if so please speak or forever hold your peace.

(Then all of a sudden a griffin sized wolf demon with chocolate fur, black and brown wings, crimson eyes, and half an inch claws shows up in the chapel along with Wesker's older son Alex and a bunch of monsters Tyrant Wolf summoned constantly chanting "I object to the marriage")

Alex: Hi dad! And I object to the marriage.

Tyrant Wolf: I also object.

Zombie Priest: Since there are objections, the wedding is off Billy and Zombiegirl2007 are not getting married.

Zombiegirl2007: NO! (leaves)

Rebecca: YES (miraculously gets out of the duck-tape bondage)

Sora: Now our dare is from Tyrant Wolf.

Tyrant Wolf: Why don't I just announce my dares.

_Me: yay! I'm back to normal!_

alex: I'm just glad the nightmare is over

Me: ok on with dares

wesker/claire - I dare you two to have a baby (yeah I really wanna spike  
chris)

alex: so would I have a sibling or couson?

Me: both...

chris - hold this giant bloody raw steak (you'll see)

billy/rebecca - START DATEING AGAIN! (and don't break-up this time)

carlos - listen to banana phone for sixteen hours strait!

krauser - throw all your whites into the washer with a red sock (cause pink  
is what weak little girls wear)

alfred - go on amarican idol and sing horribly

alexia - here take care of my pet pheonix

p.s.  
not only will the lickers attack chris for the steak but I will to!

Wesker: Claire.... (takes her hand and disappears for a indefinite period of time)

Chris: Claire NO!!!!!! (tries to go after his sister but Sora shoves a bloody raw steak in his hands) What's with this?

Sora: Just wait and see.

Joshua, Lickers that inhabit the bed, and Tyrant Wolf: (attacks Chris for the steak)

Chris: HELP ME!!!!! (tries to run away but gets torn to bits for the steak.)

Claire: Chris, you have a niece (walks in with Wesker and holding a baby wrapped in a pink blanket)

Sora: Aww, I wanna see the baby! (runs to Claire and looks over her shoulder to see the sleeping baby) A precious gift from above.

Alex: I got a sister/cousin!

Rebecca: umm Sora, is Chris okay? (sees Chris' dismembered body parts twitching.)

Joshua: (Gets a toothpick and picks out bits of steak and guts out of his teeth) That was a good meal but Chris' insides could use more spice.

Cindy: What is wrong with you?

Joshua: I'm a licker, meat is what I eat and if I say so myself I'm a conesuer of meat.

Lott: Sure you are.

Sora: You guys look at the baby! (quickly revives Chris) Chris look at the adorible baby.

Chris: She does look cute (then sees that the baby has snake-like eyes which are a mix of red, yellow, and blue) Wait a sec those eyes (looks at Wesker who for some reason has his shades off thus revealing his eyes) AHHH!!! (faints)

Baby: (giggles and claps after Chris faints)

Almost all RE cast: AWW!!!

Sherry: What are you going to name her?

Wesker: How about Diana?

Claire: But I like the name Sarah.

Sora: How about the Sianha, huh? It's Diana and Sarah combined.

Claire and Wesker: (look at eachother then the baby) I like it.

Billy: Becca I wanna be your man again.... will you take me back? (get down on his knee)

Rebecca: Of course Billy (hugs him then kisses him)

Carlos: Kay time for me to listen to this song called "Bannana Phone" (puts on headphones)

Sora: He's dead for sure, even I can't stand it I've listened to the first 40 seconds of it and I already went crazy.

// 16 hours later //

Carlos: MAKE IT STOP!!!! (throws off his headphones and crawls into the fedal position while covering his ears)

Joshua: Damn.... that song really does make people go nuts.

Salazar: Well time to do laundry. (picks up a basket almost two times his size)

Ada: Midget whose laundry is that?

Salazar: Krauser's. He's paid me $20 to do his laundry.

Ada: Well then here's an extra 20 if you put a red sock in the whites. (hands Salazar $20 and a red sock)

Salazar: (takes the $20) Done.

(Once the laundry was done every single white clothing of Krauser's was pink as can be)

Krauser: WHAT THE HELL!? (pulls out pink underwear)

Leon: Dude, you're soo going to get killed. (hands Krauser a pink shirt, pants, and socks)

Krauser: Why say that? (puts on the pink clothing)

Sora: EVIL PINK!!!! (weilds a Giant Majini's club engulfed in flame) DIE!!!!!!! (goes after Krauser)

Krause: HOLY S*** (runs for his life)

Alfred: Everyone I'm going to sing on American Idol and I will win (leaves to go to where American Idol is being held)

**// American Idol Studio //**

Paula: Alfred Ashford let's see what you got.

Simon: Hope you know that this is not "Britan's Got Talent" right?

Alfred: I know this is American Idol and I will emerge victorious. (takes the mike and sings an off-key version of 'Crank that Soulja Boy")

Randy: Oh my lord, that is the worst singing I've ever heard.

Simon: You definitely do **NOT** belong in the singing world and don't even think that you'll be capable of singing at little kids birthday parties or to your siblings only to have them lie to you saying that you have a good singing voice.

Paula: I have to agree with Simon and Randy, you have unfortunately lost this round goodbye and don't come back.

Alfred: (leaves looking as pitiful as possible)

**// Back in the Studio //**

Alexia: Shame you didn't make it into the first round dear brother, you never did have much of a singing voice unlike myself. Also thanks to Tyrant Wolf I have a pheonix as a pet. (pets the pheonix)

Sora: Ha ha, you didn't make it in American Idol! (laughs at Alfred) I knew Simon would chew you to shreds but I didn't think that he'd wail on you, but now our next dare is from cloudkennedy.

_lol this is the dancing zombies.i would love to see  
everybody try to rap & breakdance_

Speyer: I am so loving this (then starts beatboxing and Barry starts breakdancing)

Chris: (wakes up to see Barry breakdancing and Speyer beatboxing) damn I thought you would be over your beatboxing habit already.

Misc RE cast: (begins following Speyer's beatboxing and breakdances the best they could)

Sora: Wow who knew that these people could dance just by listening to Speyer beatbox.

Ashley: (tries to rap along with Angela and other RE characters)

Joshua: I really don't know how to react to this, what about you Sora (turns to Sora who's listening to her music)

Sora: What? (pulls out one of her headphones and the song "Sally's Song" sung by Amy Lee is heard)

Joshua: The music?

Sora: I really don't prefer rap unless I can understand the words and it has a good beat I can listen to.

Joshua: okay and now our next dare is from Black Dragon41

_I dare Wesker to kill Irving, 5 times using diffrent meathods each time._

I dare Chris to challange Krausar to DDR.

I dare Salazar to take a bath in lava.

I dare Ada to make out with an ganado!

I dare Alfred to kiss an electric eel!

ThanX!

Wesker: I like this one already, now that idiot can pay for his incompetence. (cracks his knuckles and neck)

Irving: Wait boss, please don't kill me, haven't I been of good use to you? (then gets picked up and stabbed in the chest by Wesker's fist.)

Sora: That was quick (revives Irving) four more times.

Irving: NO! (gets his mouth forcibly opened by Wesker and shoves a grenade down it, then the grenade explodes)

Joshua: A bit gruesome don't you think? (revives Irving)

Wesker: No (Injects Irving with a volitle substance)

Irving: (turns purple and drops dead)

William: I've been wondering what that substance does.

Annette: Will.... how long have you had that substance?

William: It was in the safe in our house, I left Albert the combination so he could get to it.

Sora: Imbecile! (revives Irving) Wezzy you have two more kills to go.

Irving: please no more (on his knees begging)

Wesker: No, (picks up Irving, take him to a dark part of the studio, revvs a chainsaw and hacks him to bits then comes back all bloody) since this is going to be my last time I will make it one that will teach him to be more useful.

Claire: Albert, Sianha is just a baby she doesn't need to be exposed to this kind of violence! (holding Sianha close to her)

Wesker: Sorry dear heart. Sora, Joshua will either one of you please revive Irving so I can finish off my dare and spend some time with my child.

Sora and Joshua: Sure (revives Irving)

Irving: WHY!!!

Wesker: Sora may I have my RL back?

Sora: Sure Wezzy (hands the RL back) but if you aim it at me or Joshua you will get it confiscated again.

Wesker: Understood (fires the RL at Irving and kills him)

Chris: I really don't like DDR but I guess I'll have to play it.

Krauser: That goes for me to (sets up the game) What song should we play?

Sora: I got one (sets the song to Sakura) Have fun and don't fall.

(while the two were playing against eachother Krauser decides to do the splits and ends up hurting himself and Chris falls on his face thus giving him a bloody nose)

Joshua: BLOOD!!! (pounces on Chris and devours him along with Krause)

Sora: JOSHUA GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!!!!! (gathers enough bravery to run over to him and pull her Licker co-host off the two dead men.)

Joshua: (Licks his lips) I love the taste of human blood.

Sora: You're going on an animal blood diet now!!

Joshua: (pouts like a child)

Salazar: Where the hell am I supposed to bathe in lava?

Sora: In our temporary volcano (points to a mini volcano)

Salazar: I was hoping you wouldn't say that.

Sora: too bad now take your lava bath!

Salazar: (stands at the edge of the mini volcano and hesitates to go in until Mendez pushes the midget in) AHH!!!!! (dies then the volcano dissapears)

Saddler: Ms. Wong I believe you have to make out with a ganado (controls a random ganado to appear before him)

Ada: I really don't want to do this.

Joshua: Sorry Ada but you have to (drinks a bottle labled "Pig's Blood") I hate this taste, it's too sour.

Ada: (grabs the ganado and makes out with him) That was disgusting it felt like I was kissing a corpse.

Sora: ha ha.

Yoko: Alfred... time to kiss Slinky!

Everyone: (looks at Yoko) Who's Slinky?

Yoko: This is Slinky (holds up a fish tank with an electric eel in it) Slinky give mommy a kiss (presses her cheek against the glass)

Slinky the Eel: (presses it's face against the glass like it was kissing Yoko's cheek)

Alfred: ooookay, (goes over to Yoko, somehow picks up Slinky and tries to kiss it but Slinky bites Alfred's lips and nose thus shocking him to death)

Yoko: Poor Alfred, Slinky hated him (puts Slinky back in its tank)

Joshua: Time for ShadowBrawler2000

_I know i haven't reviewed this befor, but when i'm done, you'll wished  
curiosity hadn't gotten the better of me. Before the dares, i have to say  
this. Albert Wesker, As a villian, i respect you. you were a very difficult  
boss in RE5 before i beat it. but i give you a bow. -crosses fingers behind  
back, then kicks Wesker in nads- Thats for trying to impale me with your F-ing  
hand. now, time for dares._

Chris: switch bodies with Wesker for the remainder of the chapter.

Wesker: before you switch bodies, i dare you say hello to my friends.  
Self-combustant weevils in space from the 9th dimesion that like pie (  
Exploding Pie).

Claire/Ada/Rebecca: I order each you to give Steve the longest and most mind  
scarring makeover you can think of. Girl with the best gets a hawaiian  
vacation with a man of her choice, along with my personal guard of special  
tyrants that look like a cross between a jaguar and chuck norris to prevent  
you from escaping, along with having to wear ankle braclets that explode if  
you leave before you come back to the studio. Losers have to kiss wesker, who  
will have mono. Then get torn apart by fanboys - evil laugh-

Sora/Joshua: If i can, can i dress as random people, monsters, Etc. at  
random, pranking them at random times per your convenience? I'll give you  
tasty non sugared goodies if you do.

Evil People: Do a good deed before the chapter's over, and they have to all  
be different.

Good People: Do something evil to a bad person of your choice.

Leon/Carlos/Luis: I want you three to plan a robbery of Fort Knox. in 60  
seconds.

For anyone i haven't mentioned: think about your worst experience in life.  
-secret note to authors-( recreate it after they say it.)

Also, Expedir a sentir la ira de la muerte del señor real. It meeans,  
Prepare to feel the wrath of the real Mr Death in Spanish.

Perpare zu fühlen den Zorn der realen Herr Todes. That means the same thing  
in german.

have fun with the reaminder of your lives everyone. - Much maniacal  
laughter-

Well, just one more thing. - To Albert-

I just have to say, that your constant insults from you on other Fanfics end  
here. next chapter, I will plot the worst and most thought out death for you  
possible.

Remember, i want everyone to do everything i say to the letter. anyone who  
does not will take a trip through the endless abyss of your worst fears and  
rabid fan people. i even need a trip to a psychiatrist whenever i go there.  
Live you remaining minutes to the fullest. they may be the last you ever  
experience.

Auf Wiedersehen ( goodbye) for now.

Wesker: What the hell is ShadowBrawler2000 talking about? What self-combustant weevils?

Self-Combustant Weevils from the 9th Dimension: (attacks Wesker and has exploding pies which detonate on contact with Wesker then leaves)

Chris: Ohh those weevils

Sora: Chris (revives Wesker) Wesker, come with me please.

Chris and Wesker: (follows Sora to a dark eerie room) Why are we here?

Sora: For this (uses her authoress powers to switch Chris and Wesker's bodies) have fun for the remainder of the chapter. (leaves the two.)

Wesker(chris): Ow, why does my nads hurt.

Chris(wesker): That would be because ShadowBrawler2000 kicked me there. (leaves to go back to the main room of the studio.)

Claire: Chris where's Albert?

Wesker(chris): I'm right here (walks over to Claire)

Sianha: WAAAAHHH!!!! (tries to get away from Wesker(chris))

Claire: Sianha what's wrong my princess.

Sora: (Chuckling at the sight)

Chris(wesker): Hello Sianha

Sianha: (looks at Chris(wesker) and reaches out to him to be held)

Claire: What the?!

Chris(wesker): (takes Wesker(chris)'s shades and puts them on)

Barry: Ohh god, Wesker's in Chris' body and Chris is in Wesker's!

Annette: That would explain Sianha wailing when Chris just spoke to her in Wesker's body)

Rebecca: Sianha knows who her daddy is and obviously hates Chris.

Wesker(chris): HEY!!

Steve: Wait a minute I don't want to be some dress up doll for the girls.

Joshua: Too bad Stevey (forces him to sit down in a chair and chains him to it) Girls prepare your makeup pallets!

Claire: Annette could you take care of Sianha for me for a little bit?

Annette: Sure thing Claire, its the least I can do after you saved Sherry. (takes Sianha)

Claire: Thanks (goes with Ada and Rebecca)

// After 3 long torturous makeovers //

Sora: I would have to say Rebecca won this contest (looks at the picture of Steve after Rebecca was done with him along with Ada and Claire)

Ada and Claire: Damn it (then become sick with mono)

Joshua: Now you have to kiss Wesker.

Ada and Claire: which one?

Joshua: The original. (drinks a new bottle labled "Deer Blood" from a straw) Deer blood really isn't that bad.

Claire: That means I'll have to kiss my brother.

Ada: No we'll have to kiss Wesker in Chris' body.

Claire: Well that isn't weird at all now is it (sarcastic)

Joshua: Just do it, Becca time for your vacation to Hawaii with ShadowBrawler2000's personal gaurd. (sends Rebecca to Hawaii)

Ada and Claire: (Kiss Chris(wesker) and then get tossed to the fanboys by Nicholai)

Sora: I want sugary goodies!!!

Joshua: No, since you put me on this animal blood diet then you'll be restricted from all sugary foods.

Sora: (gasp) You fiend. Bad guys of RE do a good deed!

Saddler: (goes out and does many hours of community service in Spain)

Sergei: (goes to Russia to rid his country of all B.O.W.s)

Chris(wesker): For my deed, I'm giving my cousin all the christmas and birthday gifts I said no to. (everyone looks at him) Don't judge me and all christmas and birthday gifts I said no to are really dangerous (leaves the studio to purchase all the gifts for Hoshi)

Irving and Excella: (goes to Africa and cleans up all traces of bioweaponry and leaves the Ndpaya (A/N: I do not know how to spell the swampland majini's original name) in peace)

(After a while all the villans of RE finished with their good deed and now the good guys of RE have to do an evil deed)

Sheva: (takes her machine guns and takes over Africa)

Jill: (Blows up the nearly demolished Raccoon City with a missle)

Wesker(chris): (gives Sora sugar thus causing Sora to go sugar high on the studio and anything outside the studio and Joshua hid in the trashcan looking bombshelter)

Barry: (takes his magnum revolver and holds a mall hostage)

Steve: (transforms into his mutant form and goes rampant on a town)

Leon: Alright men time to rob Fort Knox, what's the plan.

Luis: Why not call up Wesker's cousin, she's crazy enough to take out the gaurds. (then gets a call from Hoshi saying that she won't break into Fort Knox)

Carlos: Leon since you work for the government why don't you just use your status to get in?

Leon: can't my status doesn't work for Fort Knox what about using a bomb?

Carlos and Luis: Genius!

// After all the chaos ends and many revivals //

Sora: ow ow owowowow my head! (holds an icepack on her head) Who in the right mind gave me the most sugary food ever created.

Wesker(chris): Sorry for your headache.

Leon, Carlos, and Luis: Our plan failed miserably (came back from Fort Knox all charred)

Sheva: I had fun ruling Africa

Jill: Causing mass destruction is quite enjoyable.

Joshua: (comes out of the bombshelter) Well this ends Ch.10 hope you like it and please send in more dares, and the zombie dance team still haven't recovered from their unknown virus but Dr. T-002 is working the best he can and says that by next chapter they'll be cured, until then bye. Stew time to clean up.

Stew: (Grumbles as he's cleaning)


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil I just own my OCs along with the zombie priest and Stew the zombie janitor.**

Joshua: Time for Resident Evil Truth or Dare, we just got results back from Dr. T-002 and the zombie dance team is cured!

Sora: Me and Joshua just have to make sure that they don't eat any strange plants or infected flesh from people. And now our first two dares are from Zomibegirl2007.

_okay more dears chris think he has it ruff with Resident Evil 5 and one the  
second half Cv he must suffer by doing 2,3,4 and the first half of cv and  
survior . Ada must admit to Leon who she had sex with during resident evil 4.  
Ashely gets to fight Saddler using only a flash light. Luis has to quit  
smoking, and karuser has to apologies to ada for what he said to her. Oh  
wesker must tell the truth if it came down to killing birkin for the g virus  
would you. Birkin if wesker ask for the virus would you give that to him.  
Annette do you think your a good wife and mother? if you lie Claire will hit  
you in the gets to stab saddler with a weapon of his choice . Chris  
and Leon have to admit that they are stupid. leon has to stop being emo and  
change his looks and look like he did in resident evil 2._

Zombiegirl2007

_I Dear Nicholai Ginovaef, Sergei Vladimir and Saddler Have to dress like  
uncle sam and sing god bless america bunch of anti american creeps!_

Chris: Finally I'm back in my own body (feels sick from being kiss by people with mono) ugg what's wrong with me.

Sora: You have mono, and what makes that bad is that you have to go through RE 2, 3, 4, the 1st half of CVX and Survivor!

Chris: You've got to be kidding me?!

Joshua: nope she's not kidding you, Zombiegirl2007 thinks that you should suffer those games since you've only appeared in RE 1, the second half of CVX and 5.

Chris: Doesn't that count for something?

Sora, Joshua and the RE Cast: NO!!

Chris: Damn.

Joshua: Have fun Christopher. (sends Chris to the RE games he's never been in)

Sora: Now that Chris is gone time to continue these dares! Ada you must admit to Leon who......OMG!

Ada: What?

Sora: (hands Ada the dare card)

Ada: WHAT?! I've never had sex with anyone in RE4 I was too busy with my mission.

Ashley: Time to die Saddler (charges at Saddler with her flashlight)

Saddler: (impales Ashley with his staff before Ashley got near him) Pathetic

Luis: Are you serious, it's not possible for me to quit smoking.

Sora: Smoking kills your lungs and gives cancer! Do you want to die early!? (takes Luis' pack of cigarettes and burns them with her flamethrower and revives Ashely)

Luis: (cries over the burnt cigarettes)

Sora: You're on the path of healing Luis, just relax and give it time. (pats Luis on the back to comfort him and then looks at Krauser) Hey you big jerk apologize to Ada for what you said to her before I come at you with a flamethrower again!

Krauser: (panics) Ada I'm sorry for calling you a ** and threatening you, I was just following orders and I thought that threatening you would make you follow your orders from Wesker.

Ada: I kinda figured that was why you threatened me but that doesn't excuse the comment to me.

Krauser: Would it change anything if I got down on my knees and said I'm sorry (got down on his knees)

Ada: (smiles at Krauser's humiliation)

Sora: Admit it Wesker if it came down to killing William for the G-virus would you do it?

Wesker: No I wouldn't William is my friend and valued collegue all I would have to do is ask Will for the virus if he has completed the virus to its fullest potential.

Sora: Now that's true friendship.

Joshua: William if Wesker asked you for the G-virus would you have given it to him?

William: Of course I would've given it to him after I completed it.

Joshua: You trust Wesker that much.... wow.

Annette: I have admitted that I wasn't a good mother to Sherry and I'll admit it again I wasn't a good mother but I was a good wife.

Luis: Time for payback Saddler (takes a long rusted spear and stabs Saddler where it hurts most)

Saddler: (dies from rust poisoning)

Chris: I never want to go through that again. (came back from the RE games)

Leon: Well Chris we have to admit that we're both idiots.

Sora: NO! Leon you're not an idiot only Chris and Frost are the idiots!

Chris and Leon: We're idiots.

Leon: Now I can get my normal hair color back and finally stop being emo! (leaves to change his hair color back and change out of his black clothing and realizes that he has to wear his R.P.D uniform)

Joshua: Saddler, Sergei, Nicholai time to get into costume and sing "God Bless America" (quickly revives Saddler)

Sergei, Saddler, and Nicholai: NO WAY IN HELL!!!

Sora: Too bad, time to get dressed. (hands all three men their costumes of Uncle Sam)

Nicholai: I will not like this, I hate America.

Saddler and Sergei: Likewise here.

All RE Cast: (looks at Nicholai, Saddler and Sergei intently wondering if they will go through with the dare or not)

Sergei, Nicholai, and Saddler: (look at eachother, takes a deep breath and starts singing "God Bless America" and after singing they run off to remove their costumes and burn them)

RE Cast: (laughs at the three anti-americans)

Sora: Now...now...now (tries to catch her breath but ends up falling over still laughing)

Joshua: Now our next dare is from LDLR.

_Lily(me):Hey guys! I'm surprised ya guys made it through the obstacle course  
but it's time for RACING! I dare ya guys to race all of the mario kart cups on  
the wii except ya. Guys are gonna ride it in real life! Isn't it fun?  
Allen:Hey lily how do you make morphable voodoo dolls anyways? Plus why do  
you even make them?  
Lily:well it's family secret but okies! You are family! First you need a horn  
of a black unicorn the fur of a leviathan and the stuffings made from merlins  
beard then you neatly cut the skin in a circlular way make it big like fist  
then the stuffing becareful cause the beard Still is a powerful magic then you  
ground the unicorns horn and put some in the inside and use the rest to paint  
the outside after that sew it together then your done!  
Allen:*stares agape* woah I can't believe that you figured out how to make  
something that can make you rule the world  
Lily:*smirks evilly* why think I have enough money to make the course and  
such?  
Allen:Uh...well from your cooking?  
Lily:Nopes! I rule the Americas! Actually  
Allen:okay back to the dares okay I want ya guys to get the stuff from that  
recipe? I need to test something  
Lily:plus I dare ya guys to go on a date against but this time everyone has  
to have different dates  
Allen:plus ya guys have to rule lily's world! It's called Anime doom!  
Lily: ya I need a vacation with me sisters and Allen! So we are going to  
Hawaii! So um ya just to tell ya my pets are probably going to kill ya so use  
the back way unless the killer maids and butlers get to ya guys... Good luck  
with that! I suggest not going to our rooms by the ways there are many rooms  
one is mine it's black two is allen has a scientific symbol in it 3 is  
mystiere has a foggy but sparkly sign moonya's is a moon sign cookies and  
cream are what name applies to there sign beastia is jungle sign sucine is a  
pokemon sign chu is a panda sign and alexana a simple mahogany door  
Byes!_

// Many Mario cup races later //

Sora: (holding up four first place trophies) YEAH!! I AM VICTORIOUS!!!

Joshua: (holding three first place trophies) I can finally add some trophies to my collection!

Wesker: (holds one first place trophy) this is meaningless (tosses it over his shoulder and hits a random RE character)

Chris: Now we have to find some weird items for your son Wesker.

Wesker: Allen's also your son as well.

Chris: True but how the hell are we supposed to find these items.

Claire: Merlin lived in the Dark Ages, Levaithan is a mythical dragon and a black unicorn is a mythical horse.

Joshua: (chuckles to himself when Claire had said that Merlin lived in the Dark Ages)

Claire: What's so funny Joshua?

Joshua: I have a way to get to the Dark Ages to get Merlin's beard.

Wesker: Your author powers?

Joshua: No, a time machine (removes a sheet revealing a gigantic machine with a bunch of black lights)

Sora: Joshua... has that animal blood diet made you do some insane stuff in your spare time?

Joshua: No (drinks a champaigne glass filled to the brim with chinchilla blood) this blood is just the right texture, much richer than human blood.

Jill: I'm happy for you Joshua but does it really work?

Joshua: Yep it does, I tested it out myself when no one was paying attention to me.

Sherry: Cool, so we can go to the Dark Ages to get what we need?

Joshua: Yes and we can go to a mythical dimmension thanks to my machine, not only can it travel through time it can also travel through different dimmensions.

Sora: Umm you do know that we could just use our author powers to get what we need, right?

Joshua: Not exactly, our powers are limited to a certain.....

Sora: That's it no more chinchilla blood for you (takes away the chinchilla blood and gives him bat's blood in a bottle)

Claire: umm I'm staying here I need to be with my baby (holds Sianha in her arms protectively)

Wesker: I'll stay as well since Sianha does need a father to look after her as well.

Joshua: Alright Chris, Jill, Sheva let's get going. Sora.....if something were to go wrong use the machine to enhance your authoress powers to bring us back alright.

Sora: okay, make it back safely you guys!

**// In the Dark Ages //**

Joshua, Chris, Sheva, and Jill: (fall into the Dark Ages wearing the clothing that people wore in those ages)

Chris: Jill, Sheva are you two okay?

Jill: I'm fine

Sheva: Me too

Joshua: Merlin should be around here somewhere (looking around the area)

Merlin: Come on my dear boy we must hurry time is of the essence! (jumps through a tree as a gray squirell.)

Joshua: Merlin! Wait Merlin we need something from you! (chases Merlin as a squirell)

Chris, Jill, and Sheva: Joshua wait for us!! (runs after Joshua)

**// Back in the present time and in the studio //**

Chris, Sheva, Jill and Joshua: (Came back with a clump of white hair and black fur)

Sora: How was the Dark Ages?

Sheva: I hate those times (was looking very pissed off)

Jill: Sheva was asked by numerous men to marry them and then jousted eachother for her hand in marriage.

Claire: Are you okay?

Sheva: Just barely made it out of there single and almost got killed by a F-ing dragon which was Leviathan!

Chris: I almost got killed by a crazy witch!

Joshua: I was hardly noticed by the towns people.

Salazar: But don't you have to go to another dimmension to get a black unicorn horn?

Jill: no (pulls out a black horn from her pocket) That crazy old witch had this in her home which I took from her while she was distracted by Chris.

Yoko: Good then that's all the ingredients we needed to get so now we just send them to Lily and Allen.

Sora: (sends the ingredients to Allen) Done now you guys have to go on dates with different people.

RE Cast: How do we choose?

Joshua: Here's a hat (holds out a hat filled to the brim with paper) Choose a name.

All RE Cast: (pulled out a piece of paper from the hat)

Wesker: Damn I have to date.......Hoshi? At least I don't have to worry about her killing me.

Claire: Steve Burnside.

Chris: Sheva

Jill: Joshua Norris

Joshua: DAMNIT!!! I wanted Sora to get my name!

Sora: (punches Joshua and puts her hand in the hat) please be Leon, please be Leon. (pulls out Leon's name) YAY!!! (glomps Leon)

Ashely: SADDLER!! NO WAY!!! (prepares to put the name back but Sora stops her)

Sora: No take backs.

Salazar: I got Ada Wong.

Frost: Zombie cheerleader.......OH GOD NO!!!!

(then all of a sudden Eggman from Sonic gets thrown through a door and rolls over Salazar, then Hoshi walks through the broken door with her bodygaurds Percival and Lancelot)

Wesker: Hoshi why do you have a hedgehog and cat in suits of armor with you?

Hoshi: Their my bodygaurds and are from King Arthurs time.

Wesker: okay..... I will not ask why their your bodygaurds.

Hoshi: Suit yourself, so why am I here?

Wesker: We have to go on a date but since you're my cousin this'll be like a family reunion.

// after all the dates //

Sora: I loved my time with you Leon! (holding onto his arm)

Leon: I'm glad you enjoyed our date.

Joshua: Jill stood me up

Saddler: Ashley ran away from the moment I suggested we go to a movie for our date.

Salazar: I like my date.... even though I had to look up to her to just talk to her.

Ada: Don't forget that you had to sit in a high chair in a fancy restaraunt so you could eat and talk to me. But I had a laugh when the waiter gave you a box of crayons and a picture.

Salazar: I even told him I was 20 years old but he didn't believe me!

Zombie Cheerleader: (moans something around "I love my new man, he has a great sense of humor")

Ashley: Umm could someone translate please?

Sora: She said that she loves her new man because he has a great sense of humor..... where is Frost anyway?

Zombie Cheerleader: (shrugs her shoulders and moans "I think my brother found him")

Claire: I kind of liked my date with Steve but I really prefer being with Albert.

Steve: But Claire I love you, didn't my confession in Antartica mean anything to you?

Claire: You confessed your love to me as you were dying, I don't like confession during death!

Chris: My date with Sheva was pretty..... interesting.

Sheva: Why was there such a long pause in your sentence Chris?

Chris: No reason. (tries to run away but Sheva has a hold of him)

Weser: Hoshi's bodyguard Lancelot attacked some person for flirting with her and she told him to hurt or kill anyone who flirts with her. I got dragged all over the place by Hoshi to every single place she wanted to go and to my misfortune there was an Umbrella worker witnessing the whole thing!

Sora: Time to go to Anime Doom to rule for Lily while she's away with her family.

**// Anime Doom //**

Sora: I like this mansion, Lily's lucky to be able to live in this huge building (looking at a mansion)

Jill: Didn't Lily say something about her pets killing us or her butlers and maids trying to kill us?

Sora: No, no she did not.

Jill: Alright

(Then as Jill, Chris, Sora, Joshua, and other RE character snuck in through the back a few of Lily's maids and butlers found them and chased after them with misc weapons.)

Sora: This reminds me of the game Haunting Grounds! (runs up a staircase with Joshua while the RE cast scattered throughout the mansion)

Frost: I hope I don't walk into a room that I'm not supposed to be in (sees about several mahogany doors) How the hell am I supposed to know which room I'm not supposed to go in if there are more than one mahogany doors!

Random Killer Maid: DIE!!!!! (coming at Frost with a butcher's knife)

Frost: (quickly runs into a random room and locks the door)

Jill: (runs into the basement to hide)

(After some time the RE cast manages to stay alive for so long but Chris got eaten by one of Lily's pets, Jill got minorly injured by a butler, Frost was still locked in a random room, Joshua hid on the ceiling thanks to his licker abilities and Sora became friends with one of Lily's maids. Once the RE characters were done in Anime Doom they went back to their own world.)

**// RE Stage //**

Sora: uhh you guys.... where Wesker?

Wesker: Get this wack job maid off of me!!!! (runs in the studio with a maid trying to strangle him while biting him)

Sora: (looking like she was in deep thought) I don't know, should we help him or not Joshua (turns to Joshua who somehow gotten a hold of another bottle of a random animal's blood) Joshua, what blood is that?

Joshua: Shadow's, Hoshi gave it to me.

Sora: So hedgehog.

Joshua: Basically yeah, though there is a strange after taste to the blood.

Sora: That's because Shadow the Hedgehog was created, not a biological hedgehog.

Joshua: ohh

Wesker: Did you two forget about me!?

Claire: Sora help Albert, Sianha needs her daddy.

Sora: Fine, (walks over to Wesker, takes out a club and bashes the maid over the head with it.) better?

Wesker: Yes thank you.

Joshua: Now to send her back (sends the maid back to Anime Doom) our second to last dare is from Tyrant Wolf.

_MUAHAHAHAHA! PREPARE FORE YOUR DOOM!_

wesker: sing puff the magic while wearing a cute dragon costume and video  
tape it and put it on youtube

chris: wack yourself in the happy place with a steel bat

alexia: here take my firedog

p.s. my parents can play RE5 on mercenary mode without dying a single time,  
oh and wesker was not that tough of a bady in RE5

Wesker: I have to do what now?

Claire: Sing "Puff the magic" while wearing a cute dragon costume.

Enrico: I'll be the one doing the taping and posting it on youtube. (bringing out a high-tech video camera)

Jill: I got the costume (pulls out a pretty blue dragon suit)

Wesker: Why me? (takes the costumes and leaves to change into it.)

Sora: This is going to be soo good. (chuckles evily)

Wesker: (comes out of the changing room in the dragon costume and hears a roar of laughter from all the RE cast) This is too humiliating.

Claire: Albert, Sianha thinks your funny say hi to her. (faces Sianha towards him)

Wesker: Hello Sianha

Sianha: (giggles cutely and pulls at the dragon face)

Joshua: Time to sing Wesker, Enrico roll the camera.

Enrico: Rolling (turning on the camera)

Wesker: (starts singing "Puff the Magic")

Sora: Drat before I forget (revives Chris) Jill go see the doctor for your injury.

Jill: It's not that bad.

Sora: (Takes out her flamethrower) GO TO THE DOCTOR!!!!

Jill: (Runs to the doctor's office only to get killed by Dr. T-002)

Sora: I love my doctor (revives Jill)

Jill: I hate you.

Sora: I know, I know. Chris here's a steel bat. (hands Chris a steel bat)

Chris: What do I do with this.... wack Wesker with it?

Sheva: No you hit yourself in the happy place with it.

Chris: Damnit haven't I gotten enough crotch hits already.

Sora: No, besides it's funny watching you writhe in agony!

Chris: I know I'm not going to like this. (wacks himself in the happy place as hard as he could, cries in pain like theif in Home Alone 3 did when he got hit and fell to the ground)

Alexia: I love Tyrant Wolf, her pets are fire based and destructive (pets the firedog along with the pheonix that's perched on her shoulder)

Sora: This will be our last dare for this chapter and it's from The True One

_I dare brad and ashley to die in every horrific way possible also after that  
brad has to go through every resident evil game_

Joshua: Ohh great, mine and Sora's creator has been becoming more sadistic lately so Brad and Ashley's death will be excrutiatingly horrid.

Sora: I already got a list of what we could do to them! (holding a list)

Ashley and Brad: Give me that list!!! (dives for the list but Sora dashes out of their way thus making them fall into the rabid fanpit) HELP!!!!!! (gets torn to shreds)

Salazar: Was that one of the things on the list?

Sora: (looks on the list) Nope but my favorite one on the list is putting them over an open fire.

Joshua: Don't even thing about it, besides this is a T rated fic so over half of the things on the list can't be used.

Sora: Damnit, I wanted to use the acid and razor wire.

Wesker: My opinion of you is changing, have you wanted to use those methods on Chris?

Sora: Yep but I'm not going to join you if you ever rule the world. (revives Ashley and Brad)

Ashley: I don't ever want to do that again.

Brad: Same here..... wait is something burning?

Ashely: Yeah something is burning, what is it?

Sherry: It's you two!! You're over an open flame!!

Ashley and Brad: (look down to see that their in an open flame and try to get away but are trapped then burned to death)

Sora: I love fire, fire's my best friend. (revives Ashley and Brad once more) Brad, you must go through every single Resident Evil game, you got off easy in the mansion but let's see how you do in the other RE games.

Brad: No please don't! I beg of you. (falls to his knees begging)

Joshua: See ya later Chickenheart..ohh I mean Brad (sends Brad to do his dare)

// Several deaths and revivals later //

Brad: (comes back looking like he faced WWI)

Sora: I see that your dare went okay.

Brad: I need to sleep now, (walks over to the double king sized bed)

Sora: Brad NO DON'T!!!

Brad: (falls on the bed and gets torn apart by the lickers)

Sora: When is he ever going to learn? This chapter is over I hope you like it and send in more dares. Since the zombie dance team is all better they will be dancing to Soulja Boy's song whom I don't know the name to! (hears her phone ring, answers it and Hoshi's calling) Hey Hoshi..... YOU WHAT?! Okay it would be great working together with you, see ya soon... you want me to watch Sonic News? Alright bye.

Wesker: Why did Hoshi call you?

Sora: She blew up her stage and she's going to be here while it's getting repaired and she told us to watch Sonic News.

Joshua: Already on it (turns on the TV to Sonic News from a two weeks ago broadcasting Hoshi ruling the world and Veronica being escorted around the world by Eggman)

Wesker: She took over the world.... I'm so proud of her.

Sora: You should be.

Zombie Dance Team: (starts dancing to a random song by Soulja Boy after the spotlight hits them)


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil I just own my OCs along with Stew and the zombie priest. I also do not own Hoshi, Veronica or Serenity they belong to Akako so DON'T STEAL THEM!**

Sora: Hello everyone as you may have read in the last chapter Hoshi and her Sonic cast are join us until their stage is fixed......... Hoshi, how did you destroy your stage?

Hoshi: I stepped on the controls for the Eclipse Cannon. And no you cannot borrow it cousin Albert.

Wesker: Damnit

Veronica: Sora, shall we kill someone.

RE Cast: WHAT?!

Joshua: Ohh ya I remember you always kill someone in the beginning of your chapters.

Hoshi: I have fireworks. (points to a rocket with Eggman tied to it)

Sora: Let me add something it looks incomplete....oh Chris (in a sing-song voice and has an evil smile)

Chris: You want me to like the rocket?

Sora: You could say that (ties Chris to the rocket with chains)

Chris: NOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (tries to get free but failed)

(After Chris gets tied to the rocket Sora, Hoshi, and Veronica began arguing about who is going to light the rocket and then Serenity lights the fuse and the rocket takes off through the roof)

Chris and Eggman: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (boom)

Sora: Who was that?

Serenity: I'm the second co-host!

Sora: I want a second one.

Hoshi: Don't worry you'll get one.

Veronica: Just start the dares already.

Hoshi: Wait we forgot the Sonic Cast.

Veronica: Chaos Control. (Sonic Cast appears)

Shadow: Oh god no!

Sora: Lets start the dares, and now our first dares are from, Akako Hama.

_Hoshi here._

_Cousin Albert: I'm feeling very sadistic today. Dive into the fangirls in a  
speedo. There will be a towel nearby. And the only reason I took over the  
Sonic world is because I was dared, and I had the controls to the Eclipse  
Cannon that can destroy planets and pierce stars, and you cannot borrow it._.

Chris: Watch this video. (Hands him the video of Sonic giving birth) Then put  
on a Sonic Costume and let Amy Rose do whatever she wants to you.

Sora: You get a second Co-Host from the future, she's cool. And take anyone  
you want into the closet. Also you get a pet Chao.

Frost: I am breaking both of your arms and legs, you ge to visit my doctor.  
(Don't tell him it's pyramid head)

Claire: Let me hold your baby.

That's it for now I will enjoy helping torture you all, even you Cousin  
Albert

Sora: When did you send in the dares?

Hoshi: I have a laptop.

Sora: ohh, Wesker dive to your fangirls in a speedo.

Wesker: WTF!!!! HOSHI!!!

Hoshi: I was feeling sadistic (starts to fake cry)

Wesker: Ohh s****, Hoshi I'm sorry

Hoshi: THEN DIVE TO YOUR FANGIRLS IF YOU ARE! AND DON'T FORGET YOUR SPEEDO! (places a towel at the edge of the fangirl pit)

Wesker: (goes to the changing room to put on the speedo that was convienently in there then comes back out and dives to his fangirls)

Wesker fangirls: EEEKKKKK!! WEZZY'S IN A SPEEDO!!! (fights to steal the speedo)

Wesker: GET OFF ME YOU CRAZIES!!! (climbs out of the fanpit and rapidly puts on the towel.)

Hoshi: I am evil!

Shadow: When did you figure that out? (being sarcastic)

Hoshi: That's it (throws Shadow to the yaoi fangirls along with Sonic) HA!! How's that for evil!!!!!

Sora: (looks at Hoshi shocked and wide-eyed)

Veronica: She does that all the time. (revives Chris and Eggman)

Chris: Don't ever do that to me again!

Joshua: Don't worry Sora won't and here's an awesome movie for you (hands Chris the Sonic giving birth video)

Chris: Thanks (take the movie and watches it) AAHHHHHHHHH!!! THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE!!!! How the hell can a male hedgehog give birth!?

Wesker: I'm not even going to ask.

Serenity: There's a beautiful thing call....... YAOI FANGIRLS!!!!!

Hoshi: Good job my army, you may keep Sonic and Shadow for the chapter.

Sonic: NO, wait that doesn't go there!!!! Not bottom again!!

Hoshi: I must watch!! (Dives into the yaoi fanpit)

Tails: She belongs there.

Hoshi: THANK YOU!!! OHH THAT'S HOT!!

Wesker: Oh god (covers his face)

Sora: Sweet I'm getting a new co-host!

(Then a portal opens up and the song that played in Resident Evil the movie when the characters were going down to the Hive starts playing and a girl with dirty blonde hair with bangs covering her left eye came out holding a portable speaker and mp3 player)

Sora: Who's that?

Veronica: That's your new co-host, Alexis, she's from the future like Silver.

Sora: Isn't he the hedgehog with quils that look like marajuana leaves?

Silver: My quils don't look like that!!!

Alexis: Shut it marajuana head!

Hoshi: (climbs out of the pit laughing and playing Aura (Evil Version))

Knuckles: Of course she'd be playing an evil song, she's pure evil.

Hoshi: Master Emerald, fanpit. Jill from Jack's fic.

Knuckles: SHE TOOK MY MASTER EMERALD!!! (dives into the pit and gets dragged off by Jill.)

Jill: I can't believe there's a fangirl with the same name as me.

Hoshi: Now he's afraid of your name. Oh Sora, closet with anyone you want.

Sora: LEON!!! (drags him off) TO THE CLOSET OF LOVE!!! (goes to the closet)

Chris: We have one of those?

Alexis: Duh you moron, every Truth or Dare does. Mo.... I mean Sora just never used hers.

Chris: Okay

Sora: (comes out of the closet happy as ever)

Leon: (grinning)

Ashley: GRRRR

Alexis: (laughing at Ashley then takes out a L. Hawk and shoots Ashley)

RE and Sonic Cast: WHOA!! (shocked to see the new co-host kill Ashley)

Alexis: I hate her.

Hoshi: I have a chao! (hands Sora the chao)

Sora: AWW (cuddles)

Hoshi: Time for me to go to Anime Doom to get Frost for his dare. (goes to Anime Doom and comes back with Frost shaking) You get to visit my doctor. (breaks Frost's arms and legs)

Frost: AHH!!! (sees Hoshi's nurse from behind) let's go!! (tossed in)

Nurse: (turns around to reveal a horribly mutilated face)

Hoshi: They're all from Silent Hill.

Sora: Whoa that's evil... wait who's the doctor?

Frost: IT'S RAPING ME, GET IT OUT! HELP MEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alexis: What the?

Hoshi: Pyramid Head forgot to switch back to kill then rape. He's raping then killing.

Joshua: Well that does add pain before getting killed.

Hoshi: Once he's revived he's getting sent back to Anime Doom. Lily said she needed him back. (sends Frost back to Anime Doom after his body flies out onto the stage) Who want to see my doctor now?

Eggman: (in fetal position) THE HORROR!!!!! (gets kicked to the anti-fans by Hoshi)

Hoshi: Now for next dares....can I announce them.

Joshua and Sora: By all means.

Hoshi: Christian Ann-Redfield. Ohh and Claire I want to hold Sianha.

Claire: Just be careful with my baby. (hands Sianha to Hoshi who's holding her gently)

_I Love your story!  
DARES:  
Claire/Wesker: Want you to spend time together with your cute baby!  
Chris : You will do everything Claire, Wesker and Jill say for the rest of  
the chapters...  
Jill : Ask Chris to marry you!  
Sherry and All Girls RE : Time for a tea party!Again!!With Chris, Leon,  
Billy, Wesker and Carlos...Oh! and with Sianha!_

Claire: We've been doing that the entire time (cuddles Sianha after getting her back from Hoshi)

Hoshi: I have a baby here too (holds up baby Veronica)

Sora, Alexis, and other RE girls: Awww look at her big eyes.

Hoshi: Sonic had to go through nine months of pain to get this.

Sora: whoa yaoi fangirls are scary.

Baby Veronica: (shoots Amy)

Sora: I didn't notice the evil pink, good job baby Veronica (pats baby Veronica on the head) time for Chris' dare.

Wesker: Kill yourself Chris.

Chris: Why should I.

Hoshi: YOU HAVE TO, OR YOU'LL FACE MY ARMY!!!

Chris: (kills himself)

Baby Veronica and Sianha: (laughs and claps)

Alexia: Aww, such a cute baby hedgehog

RE Cast: (goes wide-eyed at what Alexia said)

Joshua: (revives Chris)

Jill: Chris, (gets on her knee and somehow takes out a wedding ring) will you marry me?

Chris: Of course I will, I love you Jill.

Alexis: Jill you can do better! Why marry an idiot?

Sherry: Time for another tea party!!! (somehow has dresses ready for the girls of RE)

Sora, Alexis, and Hoshi: No dresses (backs away from the dresses and goes to the tuxedos)

Hoshi and Alexis: (found tuxs that had fit them)

Sora: There are no more tuxs! Ohh well guess I'll have to wear a dress. (goes to the dress section and picks out a black dress)

Rest of the RE Cast: (gets their tux and dresses and goes to where-ever the tea party is held)

Sherry: Time for the tea party (begins serving the tea and snacks) Alexis, would you like some milk or sugar with your tea.

Alexis: Sugar.....lots of it.

Sora: That's exactly how I take my tea too.

Claire: (feeds Sianha a very small piece of bread and a bottle of milk)

Wesker: (sips his tea) This is actually better than last time we had to attend this tea party.

Sherry: Thanks uncle Albert, I made this all by myself.

Hoshi: Can I have some sugar in this (points to her tea cup)

RE Cast: NOO!!!! (takes the sugar far away from Sherry and Hoshi)

Chris: Don't give that crazy yaoi loving fangirl sugar (all of a sudden dies after drinking his tea)

Jill: Wesker what did you do to Chris? (takes Chris away from the table and glares daggers into Wesker)

Wesker: Nothing of the sort, now why would I harm Claire's brother?

Jill: Because you hate him, (takes Chris' cup and inspects it) Well it seems you haven't contaminated his tea

Hoshi: Give me that (takes the tea and drinks it)

Wesker: HOSHI NO!!! (tries to take the tea away)

Hoshi: Cousin Albert did you poison this?

Wesker: Yes I did.

Hoshi: Whatever (drinks more)

Wesker: NO!

Hoshi: Author powers, they protect me from being poisoned.

Wesker: (sighs in relief)

Alexis: That expression on your face was priceless Wesker (chuckling at Wesker)

Wesker: Shut it you brat

Alexis: Make me

Sherry: Alexis, uncle Albert please don't fight

Carlos: Yeah that behavior is very unbecoming of you two, especially you Alexis, women are supposed to be properly mannered and...... (all of a sudden gets handed a few leaves) What's this?

Alexis: special herbs for your tea Carlos. (puts on an innocent smile)

Carlos: Thank you Alexis (puts the leaves in his tea and drinks the tea along with the leaves and dies)

Sora and Joshua: What did you do Alexis?

Alexis: Rhubarb, gotta love the deadly leaves.

Hoshi: Isn't she a good co-host.

Sora: Yep and now time to end the tea party and get on with more dares. (leaves to go get back into regular clothes along with the rest of the RE Cast) Now for our next dare from LDLR

_Allen: -is wide eyed-I have a stepsister?!?!? Yay I got the ingreidents! Time  
to make my own morphable voodoo! -runs off somewhere-  
Lily:Thanks guys for taking care of my planet! Plus the maids said that Sora  
was an awesome guest! Plus you might not see frost in awhile...  
Lily's sisters:That perv! He went through our stuff!  
Frost:Oh god why! Why me!! Haven't you tortured me enough?!  
Lily: -smashes frost head in a spike table- Well any ways! Yay! I'm so glad I  
dared hoshi to rule the world! Plus Hoshi Sora Veronica Serenity and joushua !  
You are free to use anime doom as a stage! Okay onto the dares I dare everyone  
to have a gender switch! For one whole chapter! This doesn't apply to hosts  
After that... A cook off! Sonic versus RE! Chu is going to be one of the  
judges and the hosts will be judges 2  
Chu: Hey guys! It's me well...I dare everyone to escort me to my fiancé who  
lives in japan...His name is Daisuki and he is a very sweet panda boy -sighs  
dreamily- and we are getting married and I need help with the wedding plans so  
help me?  
Moonya: hey sora can I have frost as a slave also? He touched some things  
that he should nver touched!  
Lily: Hey you guys! Endou Berryyan and Cloudy came to visit us from Japan!  
And they have dares also  
one is for everyone to fight each other two is find cloudy's Lighting she  
lost it somewhere and berry wanted for everyone to find a Mystical Berry  
shaped idol which can grant anyones wishes! But the cost is the lost of  
something that will hapen in the future  
Allen comes back with an aura of happiness around him :I did it! I made the  
morphable voodoo! Plus I made some wlecronic zappeda  
Lily: zappeda? Some kind of zapper that saps you of your free will?  
Allen: ya one last dare I Dare EVERYONE TO MAKE A WORLD OUT OF MAGAMA MUD AND  
SEEDS  
Everyone: Byes!_

Sora: Oh my god, this is going to get pretty interesting. (changes the gender of the RE and Sonic Cast)

Alexis: Yes Leon has to be a girl while the rest of the cast go through a gender crisis.

Wesker: I don't like this whatsoever (still has her sunglasses on and now all of a sudden has long blonde hair.)

Jill: Even I have to admit Wesker, you're hot as a woman.

Wesker: (twitches then kills Jill)

Hoshi: This is fun. (revives Jill)

Sonic: I can't believe I'm a girl.

Shadow: I'm a girl to you know.

Amy: Sonic!!!! (glomps Sonic)

Sonic: GET OFF OF ME!!! (gets out of Amy's glomp and runs)

Hoshi: Aww man, now I don't like the marriage.

Veronica: Sora here (hands Sora back her flamethrower) You left it back in Akako's fic

Sora: Flammy!! (hugs her flamethrower)

Claire: You named your flamethower?

Sora: Yes I did..... got a problem with that? (glares menacingly at Claire)

Claire: No ma'am.

Alexis: TIME FOR RE VS. SONIC COOK OFF!!!!!!!

Joshua: This should get interesting, (sits at a table with Sora, Hoshi, Chu, Alexis, Veronica, and Serenity)

Sora: Wait a minute, in the Idiot Olympics didn't Knuckles make man-eating goop?

Hoshi: Yep he sure did but don't worry I have my incendiary launcher with me just in case. (sets the flame rocket launcher at her side)

Sora: (sighs with relief) Lets get this cook off on the road!

Wesker: This is the most awkward moment of my life.

Alexis: I thought the most awkward moment of your life was jumping to your fangirls in a speedo and having them steal it from you.

Wesker: How'd you know that?!

Alexis: I got informed.

Veronica: Get cooking!

// After some time //

Sonic Cast: We prepared escargo (removes the platters cover to reveal snails)

Alexis: Do we have to eat it?

Hoshi: YEP!!! (takes some snails and eats them)

Sora: Well, as the old saying goes "don't knock it till you tried it". (eats a snail) It's pretty good.

Alexis: As mother said "nothing ventured nothing gained" (hesitantly takes a snail and puts it in her mouth then runs to the nearest bathroom but unfortunately doesn't get there in time)

Stew: (Grumbles while cleans up with David)

David: Damn kids, throwing up over a little snail (finishes cleaning and goes to clean other messes with Stew)

RE Cast: (reveals their dish to be.......undescribable)

Chu: Uhh, what is this?

Frost: Frothy!

Rebecca: Ignore him, to be honest I don't know what it is. (looks at the dish weirdly)

Veronica: It looks like something was massacred on the plate (pokes the mess with a fork)

Joshua: I'll try it (takes a bite out of it and all of a sudden begins to eat it all while laughing like a madman)

Sora: Oh s***, did someone put rare meat in there?

Barry: I did, I thought it would give it a nice taste.

Sora: YOU MORON!! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT CHAOS YOU'VE CAUSED!!!!??

Joshua: Must... have... more... BLOOD!!!!!! (goes after the RE Cast)

Alexis: Good thing I have this (takes out a blow dart tube and puts in a tranquilizer dart) Sorry I have to do this Joshua (shoots the dart at Joshua and on contact Joshua fell asleep)

Hoshi: Upon Joshua going crazy RE cast you're disqualified, Sonic cast wins.

Sonic Cast: YAY!!!

Sora: Yes Moonya, you can have Frost as a slave, just make sure I get him back when he has dares to do, the same goes for Krauser. (sends Frost to Moonya)

Alexia: Great now we must fight eachother.

Alfred: Why must people dare in violence?

Sora and Hoshi: VIOLENCE IS FUN!

Serenity: Time to fight everyone!

// After the fight //

Hoshi: I am the victor!!! (revives everyone)

Alexis: Damn even with my powers I lost.

Alexia: get used to it, Hoshi is unbeatable

Sora: Now we have to search for Cloudy's lightning and Berry's mystical berry shaped idol.

Brad: Where are they?

Sora: That I do not know, Veronica do you?

Veronica: 'fraid not

Serenity: Well lets get to looking!

(After traveling anywhere imaginable the RE Cast, Sonic Cast, and the hosts from each fic finally found the lightning and the berry, though upon finding them Alexis immediately shipped them off to LDLR and went back to the studio)

Joshua: Finding Cloudy's Lightning and Berry's Mystic Idol Berry, check (checks off a box a piece of paper labled "Things To Do for LDLR" Now everyone has to make a world out of magma mud and seeds.

Chris: You've got to be kidding? Make a world out of magma mud and sees?

Hoshi: Yes you heard what Joshua said now everyone get to it.

// After an indefinite period of time //

Wesker: Finally its done. (sits down in a chair)

Chris: I need to go lie down (goes to the bed with Lickers)

Sora: I'm not even going to bother, those idiots are going to go for the bed since it looks so comfy and inviting.

Lickers inhabiting the bed: (kill Chris from the moment he jumped on the bed)

Claire: Why do you still have that bed?

Sora: It looks so comfy that I can't help but want to sleep in it, even though there are lickers in it but they for some reason won't harm me.

Hoshi: Lickers are afraid of me, watch (goes and sits on the bed then once sitting on the bed the lickers ran away) See.

Joshua: Maybe it's because you broke one of the licker's spines while hugging it.

Hoshi: I can't help it that I can't control my strength.

Alexis: Yeah it can't be helped also our next dare is from Vieraheart15

_Hi. First time reader and reviewer, at least for this.  
Alexia, you are the greatest, but I'm gonna have to pick on you now. Make out  
with Wesker for 5 minutes. And you can't light him on fire or any of your  
other awesome tricks and you have to enjoy it._

Alexia: No way in hell would I kiss that man! (points to Wesker)

Alexis: Alexia, even though I think you're a great female villian of Resident Evil but we have two ways you can do your dare. The easy way or the hard way, your choice.

Alexia: And what if I don't want to do my dare?

Alexis: Hard way it is. (walks away for a bit and comes back wearing a Jigsaw mask and weilding two linear launchers aimed at Alexia)

Alexia: S***! Okay okay I'll do it. (then all of a sudden turns seductive) ohh Wesker (walks towards Wesker and makes out with him and unknowingly makes Claire mad)

Claire: That b**** is gonna die!

Sora: Claire language, you're with child.

Claire: Sorry and also let me see those dares (takes the dares which were put on cards and looks through them) Give me Black Dragon41's dare after Alexia is done making out with the father of my child.

Sora: Request acknowledged (takes back her dare cards)

Alexis: Damn I never knew you were a great kisser Wesker

Wesker: I've heard all that before (walks away from Alexia)

Sora: Now for Black Dragon41's dares

_Keep up the good work! :) And now time for more dares!_

1. (My sis's dare, sorry Alexi)She dares Claire to B*tch slap Alexia, and she  
can't fight back.

2. I dare Sheva to choke the Sh*t out of Irving!

3. I dare Saddler and Marcus to switch lackies and/or children(Ganados with  
Leeches) and fight against each other.

4. I dare Alfred to smoke Marijuana.

And...

5. I dare Wesker and Chris to play tug of war with a flaming chain over a pit  
filled with chocolate. (Inserted Fangirl drool)

Black Dragon41

_ShadowBrawler20 is way too mean to Wesker (The greatest Villan of all time,  
that is #1). So i have a special and giftful dare for Wesker only. X3_

I dare Wesker to kill as many of the Resident Evil characters he wants to and  
anyone he wants to. Chris, for you. Better run, run very fast! Also! Wesky  
gets his own golden thrown and gets to rule the world for a day. :)

~From me and all of Wesker's fans out there.

Claire: I am really loving my dare, ALEXIA! (B**** slaps Alexia with all her strength and left a bright red handprint on her face) That was for kissing Albert!

Sheva: About time I get to kill that annoying weasle.

Irving: What is it with people wanting to kill me.

Sora: That may be because you're somewhat annoying though some of my creators friends like you because of your Jersey accent and given you the name "Jersey Boy"

Irving: Jersey Boy! (then gets grabbed by Sheva who starts choking him to death)

Alexis: Sora, were you joking about FMB's friends actually liking him.

Sora: Nope I was serious but lets get back into business Marcus, Saddler time to switch lackies or in Marcus' case, children.

Saddler: You treat your servants as children?

Marcus: They are my pride and joy (holding many leeches in his arms.)

Saddler: Where are your "children"

Joshua: Uhh Saddler, those leeches are his children.

Saddler: I am quite disturbed.

Alexis: Deal with it señor Saddler.

Marcus: Take care of my children.

Saddler: likewise with my ganados

Veronica: Hold it you two, your dare specifically said that upon switching your lackies they have to fight against eachother under the new owners command.

Hoshi: The leeches are so winning.

Sora and Alexis: My vote's on the ganado.

Joshua: I'm on the fence.

Serenity: Go Leeches, go ganado!

Saddler: I can't control leeches!

Marcus: I probably can order these ganados.

Salazar: The ganados are plagas infectees, they only obey those with higher plagas like the Queen and Master.

(Just after the fight between leeches and ganados started the leeches had leaped onto the ganados and killed them while some of the other leeches turned into leech zombies to kill off the rest of the ganados)

Serenity: The victory goes to the leeches!!!

Alexis: Damn one would think that the ganados would win a fight against the leeches.

Marcus: The leeches have the T-virus in them and they have a hightened intelligence

Sora: That would explain the ganados' defeat. Now Alfred, normally I don't encourage this to any characters but here (hands Alfred marajuana)

Alfred: What am I supposed to do with this?

Every Character: SMOKE IT!

Alfred: alright (takes the marajuana, lights it and smokes it) whoa (then looks at Hoshi) You're so pretty.

Hoshi: (twitches and takes out a spoon) DIE!!!! (goes after Alfred who's obviously high and doesn't run away.)

Alexis: And this people is why you should never do drugs, it may send a crazy yaoi fangirl out to kill you.

Joshua: Uhh Sora, did you order something again? There's a delivery guy at the door saying that you ordered something, and please tell me that you did not order those crazed raccoons.

Sora: No that order was denied, I had rented a golden thrown for Wesker's dare and what I ordered with the thrown was 23 cases of Warheads.

Serenity: The replacement rockets for a RL?

Sora: No the candy Warheads, I've been craving them for quite some time.

Wesker: I get a thrown?

Sora: Yep but that will come in after yours and Chris' tug-of-war match......I want chocolate.

Alexis and Joshua: NO! No chocolate for you!

Sora: Awww

Hoshi: Cousin Albert is going to win no problem.

Veronica: Hoshi, the chain is on fire and they're going to be over a pit of chocolate.

Hoshi: Keep me away from the chocolate if you don't want the apocolypse to happen again.

Veronica and Serenity: Got it.

Wesker and Chris: (grabs the chain and pulls, though Wesker was stronger than Chris thanks to his virus and pulled Chris in the chocolate.)

Chris: No one told me that this defeat would be sweet. (then finds Sora putting sprinkles on him) Uhh Sora what the hell are you doing?

Sora: Putting sprinkles on you.

Chris: Why?

Sora: The nurse wants a sweet snack.

Chris: Which nurse?

Sora: Mine, Hunter nurse, he's ready for eating.

Hunter Nurse: (gurgles "CHOCOLATE COVERED HUMAN" and goes after Chris)

Chris: AHHHH!!!!! (runs out of the chocolate pit and tries to go to the bathroom to clean himself off but gets killed by the hunter.

Alexis: That was quite entertaining.

Siahna: (giggles and claps over Chris' death)

Alexis: Well I guess we know what Siahna is going to be like when she grows up.

Sora: Now Wesker it's time for your dare...well a giftful dare so here's your thrown, kill as many RE characters as you want and rule the world for a day..... ohh s*** not another Uroboros world. Ohh and before I forget (revives Chris)

Wesker: Now this I like (sits in his golden thrown and begins his reign over the world)

// One Day Later //

TV Announcer: I am here to announce that Wesker's reign over the world is over and everything is returning to normal, though some people would like to keep the statues to commemorate him.

Sora: (turns off the TV) Well this has been an excellent day, Wesker's happy, he killed every RE character he wanted and he made Claire and Siahna temporary royalty.

Joshua: Yeah and on several occasions he did try to kill us you know.

Alexis: Yeah also just as soon as he gets back here he is going to be dead. (weilds dual Lightning Hawks)

Sora: Hey I have the same guns.

Alexis: Cool and now our next dare is from...... Zombiegirl2007

_Okay Im ** off for screwing up my wedding lol no just playing i love Krauser  
I dare him to marry me lol I dare Billy and Rebbecca go to hell_

Krauser: What?!

Sora: This is going to be fun and also since Krauser is Moonya's servant you're going to have to ask LDLR if it's alright for you to marry Krauser.

Krauser: You are not going to let that fangirl marry me! (grabs Sora by the front of her shirt)

Alexis: You let Sora go right NOW!!! (kicks Krauser where it hurts and whacks him over the head with a P.R.L.)

Joshua: What is that thing Alexis?

Alexis: A P.R.L aka Plagas Removal Launcher.

Leon: Where did you find that weapon?

Alexis: In Spain, it was hidden in a vault in the research facility.

Leon: I could've used that weapon when I had to save the President's brat.

Ashley: HEY!!!

Veronica: Well until further notice our next dare is from The True One

_hey there i'm back okay first dare birkin has to rap white and nerdy on  
national television and brad has to go through every game fatal frame whats  
more scarier than zombies are ghosts_

William: I never even heard the song "White and Nerdy"

Serenity: Well here you go Willy (gives William a CD)

William: Thanks (puts the CD in a cd player and starts singing "White and Nerdy" on national TV)

Wesker: I am ashamed to even know you know Will. (covers his face)

Hoshi: Don't worry cousin Albert you still have me.

Alexis: Damnit, I hate this game but I love it at the same time (playing Fatal Frame on whatever console it is playable on)

Brad: What are you playing Alexis (looking over her shoulder to see the plasma screen TV screen looking like its in camera view.)

Alexis: Fatal Frame, the very game you're going to be going into.

Brad: WHAT?!

Alexis: The only thing scarier than zombies are ghosts. Have fun Chickenheart (puts Brad into the Fatal Frames 1-4)

Sora: I like this game, it looks really good.

Alexis: It sure it

Hoshi: How long do we have to wait till Brad gets back?

Alexis: Dunno, a long time perhaps.

Sora: We could play cards while we wait since the last dare from Tyrant Wolf requires all RE cast to be turned into cats.

RE and Sonic Cast: We're game.

// Several Hours Later //

Brad: (Comes back looking like he saw Satan, the Grim Reaper, and whatever death figure there ever was)

Veronica: He's back,

Joshua: Damn he's freaked out.

Sora: Well that would happen when a zombie fighter goes up against killer ghosts.

Serenity: Now we can do the last dare from Tyrant Wolf.

_TW: *sitting in her room watching ren & stimpy* AHAHAHA! poor ren_

alex: uh sensei?

TW: yes?

alex: the camera is rolling...

TW: oh *pauses DVD player* ello everyone! how are you doing? now on  
with...DARES AND QUESTIONS!

wesker/chris - TIME TO EARN ANOTHER SKIPPY CARD! in a race around THE WORLD!

wesker/claire - can I be siahna's godmother please? i'm great with kids!

alex: tis true

joshua - GIMMA BACK MAH STEAK DMN YOU! I CHALLANGE YOU TO A FIGHT!DX

sora - heres a pet dragon because you use all my dares

alexia - burn chris to delicous crisp!

alfred - lick 50 floors clean!...DIRTY FLOORS! and put on an old maid  
outfit!

sora(again) - can you also turn the whole RE cast into cats (including siahna  
cause she needs to match the stature of here mommy and daddy) after all the  
rest of dares are done oh and heres some speaker collors so we can understand  
what there saying

thats all for now PEACE!

Wesker: I already won this Skip Card contest.

Chris: No one's won till the fat lady sings.

Sora: That's offensive to obeise women everywhere

Chris: Sorry

Serenity: You two will start here and make sure you have the stamp of the country and capital you've been to (hands Chris and Wesker a blank notebook) On your mark, get set, go! (fires a gun thus beginning the contest.)

Claire: Of course you can be Siahna's godmother Tyrant Wolf, seeing how well Alex is being cared for, why not, I'll tell Wesker just as soon as he gets back.

Wesker: What were you wanting to tell me dear heart. (all of a sudden behind Claire)

Claire: Albert, when did you get back?

Wesker: A few minutes ago, now what do you want to tell me.

Claire: Tyrant Wolf wanted to be Siahna's godmother and I told her she could on account of how well Alex was being cared for.

Wesker: I'm also giving my consent and I won the contest, here you go Serenity check the book. (hands Serenity the book of stamps)

Serenity: Wrong person to check, here Hoshi. (hands the book to Hoshi)

Hoshi: (looks through the book and nods approvingly.) All stamps are accounted for, you win.

Sora: Here's your skip card. (hands Wesker the skip card)

Wesker: Thanks (puts the card in his coat pocket)

Joshua: You've got to be kidding me? I have to fight Tyrant Wolf?!

Alexis: Yep you sure do, all because of that ultra rare steak.

Joshua: I'm so going to die.

Sora: be glad you have five authoresses here to revive you.

(Just after Sora said her piece she put Joshua in a cage with Tyrant Wolf and upon being put in the cage Tyrant Wolf killed Joshua)

Sora: (revives Joshua) Tyrant Wolf since you defeated Joshua in battle here are some extra steaks that Joshua is not going to be eating anytime soon because of his animal blood diet. (gives Tyrant Wolf over three boxes of rare steaks then recieves a dragon) Yay I have a pet dragon and a pet chao (sees that her chao has a halo and angel wings along with looking like a chibi version of herself) aww your so cute!

Amy: How is that possible? That's a hero chao!

Chris: Sora, a good person, not possible.

Sora: SHUT IT REDFIELD (torches Chris with her flamethrower and causes her chao to turn neutral) Man my chao looked cute as a hero, but now what should I name you and the dragon?

Alexis: chose whatever name comes to you.

Sora: Alright, the chao's name will be Mizu and my dragon's name is Kasai.

Hoshi: That's Japanese for water and fire.

Sora: Yep, I thought that the name fit them and now to continue the dare.

Alexia: This will be enjoyable, (turns to Chris just after he got back from his trip around the world) Payback time for killing me in Antartica along with my ants! (sets Chris on fire and is turned into a crisp)

Hoshi and Joshua: He smells delicious.

Sora: Joshua, no have some shark blood (gives Joshua a cup of shark's blood and revives Chris)

Joshua: Fine (takes the cup and drinks out of it in disgust) I hate shark's blood.

Veronica: ohh well, Alfred time to get in uniform and lick 50 dirty floors clean. (gives Alfred who's still high a maid's uniform)

Alfred: Okay pretty hedgehog lady. (takes the uniform and changes in the changing room and starts licking the floors)

Alexia: I am ashamed to even be related to him!

Wesker: I feel your pain Alexia.

Sora: While Alfred is licking floors clean every RE character is being turned into cats! (changes all RE characters into cats)

Hoshi: Also I'm giving you the ability to speak in cat form. (gives RE cast turned into cats the ability to speak)

Cat Alexia: I look kind of cute as a feline (looking at her reflection in a mirror)

Cat Alfred: (Still licking the floors and falling every five seconds)

Cat Claire: Albert could you help me take care of Siahna?

Cat Wesker: Of course dear heart (helps take care of Cat Siahna)

Cat Siahna: Mommy, daddy!

Sora: OMG! Siahna said her first two words! This is a great moment for you two!

Hoshi: (cell rings) Hello, yes, it's finished okay, see ya. (hangs up) My stage is fixed so we'll be leaving.

Alexis: See ya

(Hoshi, Veronica, Serenity, and the Sonic cast leave and goes back to their stage)

Joshua: Those cats do look really yummy.

Sora and Alexis: Joshua...... you can eat Irving and Excella.

Joshua YES MEAT AT LAST (goes after Cat Irving and Cat Excella who are now running for their lives)

Sora: While Joshua is chasing his dinner,

Alexis: Please enjoy the zombie dance teams new dance of the Caramelldansen and please send in more dares!

(Once the spotlight hits the zombie dance team they are dressed up as RE characters and start dancing to the Caramelldansen).


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil Capcom does, all I own are my OCs, Stew and the zombie priest.**

Alexis: Damn, there is absolutely nothing in the water (wearing fishing garments and sitting in a chair that's extended outward away from the Neptune tank with a fishing pole in the water while Neptune is swimming around the line and hook)

Salazar: She's cracked, I knew she couldn't stand being with Sora for more than one chapter.

Alexis: (reels in her line to see nothing on the hook) Need more bait, (throws the line behind her and the hook snags the back of Chris' underwear)

Chris: WHAT THE HELL HAS A HOLD OF MY UNDERPANTS?!

Alexis: (pulls pole with minimal effort and throws the attached Chris in the Neptune tank and the water turns red) ohh pretty. (reels in once more to see a piece of Chris' boxers on the hook) They sure liked that..... need new bait. (thows the line behind her once again and snags Excella.)

Excella: Oh s*** get it off (tries to get the hook off but it to late when she got thrown into the tank)

Alexis: Holy I got a bite at long last! (reels in Neptune) FINALLY MY CATCH OF THE DAY!!! Someone take a picture!

Sora: Sure, (gets out a camera and snaps a pic of Alexis with the hooked Neptune)

Joshua: For those who like to keep their sanity please do not ask why Alexis was fishing in the Neptune tank when there's only one Neptune in there and everyone is back to being humans and back to their original gender. But now here a dare from Vieraheart15

_Uh... my brother Wight Mamba wanted Ada, Claire, and Leon to have a 3-way,  
because he thinks that will end the fighting between Leon/Ada fans (like me!)  
and Leon/Claire fans forever.  
Now someone is in trouble because I ate chocolate and it makes me happy and  
there's something I want to see. Alexia, I dare you to kill Alfred, any way  
you'd like.  
Wesker, this is my cat, Mittens. You have to put up with her for one week,  
because she's in heat.  
I'M FREE OF THAT CAT!! FREE! (SQUEE'S)_

Sora: This dare will have to take place in the closet, (points to the closet)

Claire, Ada, and Leon: (somewhat reluctantly go to the closet and after some time come out.)

Alexis: Yay Alexia gets to kill her cross-dressing split-personality infected brother!

Alexia: Why are you so happy about that?

Alexis: Because your brother creeps me out with his laugh, he sounds like he hasn't gone through puberty.

Alexia: Since you find my brother so creepy, how do you think I should kill him?

Alexis: Umm, how about putting gasoline on him and then set him aflame

Alexia: Alfred, I need you to do something for me.

Alfred: What is it dear Alexia?

Alexia: Pour this all over yourself. (hands Alfred gasoline)

Alfred: Of course Alexia (pours the gasoline all over himself) Was that all you wanted me to do?

Alexia: Yes, (transforms and sets him on fire)

Alexis, Sora, and Claire: Halleluha!

Joshua: Wesker here is Vieraheart16's cat, Mittens, have fun. (walks away)

Wesker: What does he mean by that (finds the cat meowing constantly and rubbing up against him) Make it stop!

Sora: Sorry Wezzy no can do. While Wesker deals with Vieraheart16's cat, we'll do our next dare from Akako Hama

_Hey, it's Akako._

Wesker: Kill Excella.

Irving: Say hello to Hoshi's ten nukes.

Chris: Meet Hoshi's older sister Yuki, she's the opposite of Hoshi, and seems  
like she stares into your soul. She'll be doing that for the entire chapter.

Joshua: Try this blood. (It's Amy's)

That's it.

Wesker: Finally I can get rid of Excella (puts Mittens down and injects Excella with the same purple substance that killed Irving)

Excella: (dies after being injected.)

Irving: What ten nukes? (hears a whistling sound) What's that?

Sora: INCOMING!!! (dives under the Licker inhabited bed)

Irving: (gets blown up by ten nukes.)

Alexis: 'bout time he gets kill by nukes also ummm...where's Yuki?

Sora: She was here a minute ago...right?

Joshua: Last time I saw her she was near those statues (points to a full row of Yuki statues)

Chris: Those statues creep me out, how do I know which one is this Yuki person?

Wesker: My guess is that you'll find out which is her when you feel her gaze on you.

Chris: Great that makes me feel much better (sarcastic) Why do I feel like that statue is staring into my soul? (points at the middle statue which happened to be the real Yuki)

Sora: Dunno but just stay there and don't move. Also Joshua I just recieved blood from Akako and she wanted you to try it.

Joshua: Are you ever going to run out of blood Sora?

Sora: Nope (hands Joshua Amy's Blood)

Joshua: (takes one sip of it and runs to the bathroom but doesn't make it) I HATE OBSESSIVE FANGIRL BLOOD!!!!

Stew: (cleans the floor grumbling)

Chris: Make that statue stop staring at me!!! (now starting to shiver) It's looking into my soul!

Alexis: I like this dare (also begins staring at Chris with a soul staring look)

Chris: NOO!! Not another one (almost curled into the fetal position)

Sora: While Alexis is tormenting Chris with Yuki and Joshua throwing up, I'll announce the next dare which is from vintage87.....ohh a new viewer.

_hi i love your story OK i have some dares Jill and Chris have to get married  
wesker has to be the best man and sora hears a infinite rocket luncher bye  
know_

Jill: Would it be possible if Yuki could stop staring at him for a moment so we can get married?

Sora: I don't know also zombie preist here you go (gives Brad to the zombie preist)

Zombie Priest: (eats Brad) Thanks, now will the bride and groom to be come here NOW! (standing behind his podium)

Wesker: Why do I have to be the best man? I don't even like Chris and doesn't the best man have to be a close friend to the groom?

Barry: The best man could also be the brother but your dare is to be Chris' best man so suck it up.

Rebecca: Who's the maid of honor?

Alexis and Sora: Trisha.

Chris: NO!!!!

Trisha: (trying to get out of the ropes she's tied in and her mouth is duck taped)

Zombie Priest: Lets get this wedding on the road. Now do you Jill Valentine take Christopher Redfield to be your lawful wedded husband and all that jazz.

Jill: I do

Zombie Priest: And do you Chris........Chris, do you not want to marry Jill or something? (sees Chris shaking like a leaf)

Chris: I have two people staring into my soul!!

Alexis: Correction, you have eight people staring into your soul.

Chris: WHAT?! (turns behind him to see Sora, Alexis, Yuki, and her five statues sitting in the first pew staring at Chris) Oh God help me.

Zombie Priest: Chris do you take Jill as your lawful wedded wife?

Chris: I-I-I-I-I I do

Zombie Priest: I now pronounce you as husband and wife.

Wesker: (smiling evily)

Sora: Oh no that's an evil smile, Wesker has something planned.

Alexis: Like what?

Trisha: DIE JILL!!!!! (somehow gets freed and kills Jill) You're my hubbie and mine alone (begins to drag Chris to the closet)

Chris: NOOOO!!! SHE'S TAKING ME TO HER CAVE!!!!! (tries to get out of her grasp)

Trisha: What did you say?!

Chris: Nothing dear.

Trisha: good (closes the closet door)

Yuki: I'm not going in there (sits down and just stares at the door)

Chris: I can still feel Yuki staring into my soul!!!

Sora: (laughing evily while petting a RL) my precious.

Joshua: Ohh God no, Sora plus an infinite RL is bad news for everyone. Quick Alexis to the bomb shelter! (drags her to the trashcan bombshelter.)

// Many explosions later //

Sora: (curled up in a corner cuddling her RL like a baby while giggling like a maniac)

Alexis: Damn Sora is trigger happy isn't she.

Joshua: Yeah she it, but she usually uses her flamethrower then again on several occasion she wants things to explode.

Alexis: ohh, (revives everyone that died from Sora trigger happiness) Our next dare is from LovelyandDeadlyLiliesandRoses

_Lily:-sniffles hacks and coughs on her bed-  
Moonya: oh great she is sick! And thanks for retrieving clody's lighting and  
the idol I'm surprised you didn't use the idol to wish back your stage? And  
wish that nothing bad will happenn in the future... Any ways the dares plus ya  
can marry krauser Zombie! And thanks for letting me to have frost!  
Berryyan:Yo ! I'm berryan! And I can draw things to life! Any wYs the dares  
I dare you guys to paint something from your heart deep within your soul  
then I want thou guys to publish your paintings around the world after that  
if you a berry igsignia sign on a card that would be me! And plus I have a  
berry shaped hair with a green stem  
after that I want you guys to sculpt something meaning full  
Beastia: -let's a sadistic laugh- I want you guys to go through the ten  
trials of damnation! In the jungles located near the obstacle course after  
that I want every one to go through the obstacle course again_

Joshua: We need another marriage Zombie Priest.

Zombie Priest: I had better be paid.

Joshua: You will.... in packages of meat

Zombie Priest: Deal, Jack Krauser, Zombiegirl2007 I offically pronounce you husband and wife!

Zombiegirl2007: Yay! (drags Krauser away to who-knows-where)

Alexis: Time to paint your soul onto the canvas! (has many canvas', paint pallets, and brushes set out for the RE Cast)

Sora: Let me go get Chris (goes to the closet and bangs on it) Trisha we need Chris, give him to us NOW!!

Trisha: Here's my Chrisy (comes out of the closet with Chris looking scared to death and shaking nonstop)

Yuki: I like staring into his soul, it freaks him out.

Sora: Well could you..... no wait keep staring at him I want to see what he does when his soul is being stared into.

Joshua: Get to painting people.

Wesker: (paints his family which consisted of Claire, Siahna, Hoshi, and Yuki and also painted Chris' dead body in the background)

Sora: aww that's soo...... isn't that Chris' dead body?

Wesker: yes.

Sora: Oddly I'm okay with that.

Chris: (just staring at the ceiling as he paints then what is painted on the canvas was a pair of soul staring eyes.)

Alexis: Creepy.

Frost: (drew a stick figure with a gun) I like this dare!

Alexia: This should be good (paints all her enemies burning and being eated by zombies)

Barry: (Paints his family and painted himself in holding his magnum)

William and Annette: (painted Sherry as an infant holding a huge teddy bear)

Krauser: (paints a quick picture of Leon's demise just before being dragged off by Zombiegirl2007)

Ada: (painted a beautiful landscape with red butterflies)

Alfred: (paints him and Alexia around an anthill while Alexia is plucking a dragonfly's wings off)

Alexis: I like these paintings though Frost, yours looks like a child painted it.

Frost: I'm glad you like it.... you're pretty cute.

Alexis: Ooookay that was sudden, umm let me introduce you to a dear friend of mine who is sure to like you. (leads him to the doctor's office and shoves him inside)

Frost: Alexis?

Patricia: Frostyoucanseethedoctor! (throws a kitchen knife at him)

Frost: Oh no (then gets dragged into the office and immediately killed by the Hunter nurse)

Sora: Alexis, where's Frost?

Alexis: He had a late appointment with Dr. T-002.

Joshua: We never schedueled an appointment

Alexis: Let's just say you did. Now time for sculpting! (already shipped off the painting to an art museum)

(After a while Wesker had sculpted a mini version of Uroboros, Jill made the insignia for S.T.A.R.S, Rebecca created a first aid kit, William made DNA while Annette sculpted Sherry)

Joshua: Good work on the sculptures now for the moment you've all been dreading, time to go back to the jungle!

RE Cast: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**// In the Jungle //**

Sora: Now that we're all here at last time for you to go through the ten trials of damnation and after your trials it's the obsticle course again!

Alexis: What are the ten trials of damnation?

Sora: Dunno, I tried to look them up but all I got was a name for a videogame

Joshua: Damn it, ohh well I guess we'll have to do our best with what we know.

Alexis and Sora: We're good with that.

// After the trials and the obsticle course and revivals//

Excella: I had to deal with Hoshi in the demon costume AGAIN!

Wesker:............

Claire: I hate unicorns, I hate going through trials and obsticles!

Chris: Be glad you didn't have to face what I had to face off against.

Jill: Uhh Claire, where's Siahna?

Claire: MY BABY!!!! (starts searching around frantically looking for Siahna)

Sora: (comes out of nowhere with Siahna who has a huge lollipop) Claire sorry for not telling you that I took Siahna I knew you'd be busy with the trials and dares so I took Siahna to keep her company and taught her how to hate Frost.

Claire and Wesker: (sigh in relief to know their child is all right)

Frost: Why would you make a cute baby hate me?

Sora: Because you died to start the Resident Evil plot and are fun to torment (shoots him and Siahna laughs)

All girls of RE: Awww

Alexis: Time to go back to the studio and get the rest of the dares over with. (uses her authoress powers to send all people back to the studio)

**// Back in the Studio //**

Alexis: (revives anyone that died from the last dare) Now time for sweetman12345's dare.

_hi u guys i would like to dare chris and jill and barry to suffer more than  
they do by having them try to kill nemisis with a bb gun and wesker since i  
am one of your fans i dare u to pick one author power that u would like to  
have and i want a the revolver Barry has please_

Jill: NO! Not again!

Chris and Barry: Who the hell is Nemesis?

Jill: A B.O.W, created by Umbrella to kill all S.T.A.R.S members.

Chris and Barry: Ohh s***

Nemesis: S.T.A.R.S

Jill, Chris, and Barry: (unintentionally run into the giant steel cage with BB guns laying about)

Joshua: Now let's get ready to RUMBLE!!! (speaks into a bullhorn)

Barry: How the hell are we supposed to kill a B.O.W with BB guns?

Chris: Maybe Sora, Alexis, or Joshua messed with these to be able to take down Nemesis.

Jill: (takes a BB gun) It's worth a shot. (starts shooting Nemesis but the BB pellets just bounced off of him)

Nemesis: (somewhat laughs and kills Jill, Barry, and Chris at the same time with the same mutated tentacle.)

Alexia: Where was he when Wesker invaded Rockfort Island?

Random Umbrella scientist: In Raccoon killing off S.T.A.R.S. members.

Sora: (revives Barry, Jill, and Chris) sweetman12345 here's Barry's prized revolver (sends Barry's magnum revolver)

Barry: You sent away my buddy!

Alexis: (polishing a magnum revolver) deal with it Burton

Joshua: As much as it may pain me, Sora and Alexis and the other RE cast, Wesker what author power would you like and it can only be one.

RE Cast except Wesker: NOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wesker: hmmm, that may be a difficult choice, seeing you three tinkering with weapons, making stuff miracuously appear, sending us to who-knows-where, and reviving people without the use of a virus after killing them, so many choices.

Sora: How about reviving people, that way you can kill Chris and revive him only to kill him again?

Wesker:....... Excellent suggestion Sora

Sora: For some reason I feel like we're going to regret this (gives Wesker his author power of revival.)

Alexis: Chris for your safety you better run for the hills.

Chris: See ya (runs into the bowels of the studio only to be chased by Wesker into the doctor's office.)

Joshua: Well this is all the time we have so we hope you enjoy this chapter and please send in more dares!

Sora: Now here's the zombie dance team doing the tango to "Tango Maureen" from the movie and play RENT!

Zombie Dance Team: (each grabs a partner, starts doing the tango and dancing along with the song)


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil I just own my OCs.**

Sora: Hey! Welcome back! Wesker still has his revival author power and killing Chris for the...... I lost count.

Alexis: Umm Chris has died 1,546 times now and is now revived again.

Chris: Stop killing me Wesker!

Wesker: Why, this is all too fun. (kills Chris with a scythe he took from the Wall of Weapons)

Joshua: I see he's making good use of the wall of weapons.

Sora: Yeah but now here's two dares from Tyrant Wolf

_TW: *is on the phone speaking with the marshins* ...what do you mean you  
don't agree with me! DO YOU KNOW WHO YOUR DEALING WITH!?!?!? *slams on a red  
shiny button that says "mars splodey button"*_

BOOM!

TW: MUAHAHAHAHA!XD

alex: Willow the camera is rolling do you not realize that?

TW: how dare you call me by my first name! *sigh* since now you all know my  
real name I guess you could call me by it I don't really mind, now on with  
dares!

wesker/chris/alfred/hunk - time to play capture the flag on *drumroll* DINO  
ISLAND! a place filled with carnivoros plants, Prehistoric animals! and  
2-legged dragons! wesker and chris as the RED TEAM! and hunk and alfred as the  
BLUE TEAM!

winners get to ride a dinosour of there choice and the losers get to sit in a  
couldren of chocolate for me to eat them! MUHAHAHAHA!

sora - theres someone who wants a job as a third assistant host his name is  
Terry he's half licker half dog and all loyal he can walk and talk too, only  
he doesn't go crazy as easly as joshua does but he can go crazy except on  
children

oh and heres a teddy cat for siahna

kudos  
Willow

Tyrant Wolf

_ok first of all i'm sorry fore trying to dump terry on you, borowing him is  
"optional" but if your intrested allow me to explane his personality and  
features._

Terry is half dog half licker, he has a short brown horse-like main that goes  
down his back and forms into a tail, he weres a red belt-buckle collor(it  
allows him to speak), his eyes are maroon red, he has pointy ears, AND he has  
little paws with huge claws.

Terry is friendly, lovable goofball that really isn't a fan of red meat but  
just absolutaly LOVES sweets, and if he ever eats pie he goes into psycho  
preditor mode, but he never attacks children cause his dog side won't allow  
it, plus he ADORES buggin the crap outta wesker and the best part is he's  
indestructableXD!

now for a few dares

chris-parachute out of a plane (sora replace the chute with silver-wear)

steve-DO A LITTLE DANCEXD!

sora-I need you ask a favor fore me from Hoshi I need her to go to neptune  
and eat a pound of sugar I would destroy the planet my self but somehow they  
shut-down the splodey button to there planet (this is optional)

irving- IRVING!DX (you better man cause i'm comin to get ya, YOU TO  
SL**CELLA!)

p.s. MOO! man I hope I won't feel like an idiot in this comment and FMB i'm  
sorry if I am piling to much on you I really don't mean it its just I get a  
little carried away sometimes

Jill: You're doing two dares from the same person?

Sora: Yep, this is going to be fun!

Alexis: You can say that again, can I go fishing in the Neptune tank again?

Sora: umm, you do know that there's only Neptune in there and no other creatures....right?

Alexis: I can add more critters to make my fishing trip more fun.

Sora: Aw hell add as many creatures as you want.

Alexis: Yes! Alright boys bring them in.

Joshua: Who did you call?

Alexis: I already ordered a couple of water critters to add to the tank.

Leon: Should I even ask what you ordered?

Alexis: I ordered; five sea snakes, seven eels, two mako sharks, eight mini neptunes, three octapi, and twenty-two stone fish.

Wesker: How did you get a hold of those sea creatures.

Alexis: I ordered online, ohh by the way Chris I got this on especially for you (hands Chris a stone fish which bites him on the arm)

Chris: AAAAAAAAAAAH!!!! IT'S GOT MY ARM, IT'S GOT MY.........(dies)

Sora: Wait a minute, aren't stone fish deadly?

Joshua: (flips through information cards on fish and stops at one) Yes stone fish are deadly, they are located at the bottom of the sea and if one bites a human they would die before the person could get to the surface.

Wesker: (revives Chris)

Chris: MY ARM!!!!! GET IT OFF!!! (dies)

Wesker: This is interesting (takes the stone fish off Chris' arm, revives him and places it on his face)

Chris: AAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S GOT MY NOSE!!!!! (dies)

Alexis: I'm naming that fish Stoney

RE Cast: (gives Alexis a wierd look)

Alexis: Oh do your dares already (puts Stoney in a fish tank)

Wesker: (revives Chris) Chris get prepared, we're going against Alfred and HUNK in capture the flag.

Chris: NO! Is Tyrant Wolf crazy for putting us on the same team?!

Wesker: I don't care, time to get going.

Alfred: Good thing I have HUNK on my side, he is an expert at stealth.

Sora: Who cares, get your butts to Dino Island. (sends the four to the island)

**// Dino Island //**

Chris, Wesker, Alfred, and HUNK: (landed in a few trees and find blue and red armor hanging on random branches.)

Wesker: I assume that the red armor is mine and Chris'

HUNK: Yes that is affirmative, since your and Chris are the Red Team, Alfred and I are the Blue Team and once we retrieve our armor we will have to go to our bases.

Chris: (goes to several branches bringing back a few pieces of red armor while HUNK got all the blue armor.)

Wesker: Let's get going Chris.

Velociraptor: (calls for the pack)

Alfred: Why did it do that.

Wesker: S*** it's calling it's pack!

Chris: I thought Raptors were solitary hunters.

HUNK: No you idiot, they hunt as a team! They'll come at us from the sides instead of the usual frontal attack.

Chris: Time to get going! (runs in a random direction)

Wesker: CHRIS!!!! (runs after him and once finding him takes him to their base)

Alfred and HUNK: (Went to their base and decided that Alfred was going to go be bait while HUNK went in to get the flag)

Wesker: You're not getting anywhere near our flag (grabs Alfred and tosses him in a tar pit)

Alfred: NOOO!!! (sinks under the tar and dies)

Wesker: That takes care of thin........(falls to the ground asleep with ten darts in his rear)

Chris: Wesker? Wesker get up! (looking at the sleeping Wesker through binoculars)

HUNK: (uses his machine gun and snipes Chris then steals his flag, taking it back to his base) We won this contest!

Wesker: ughh, what the hell happened (holding his head in his hand and looked around to see that Chris was dead and the flag was gone) Damn it Chris, guarding a flag is not that hard to do! (revives him) What the hell happened Chris, you were giving _**ONE**_ job to do and somehow you managed to screw that up!

Chris: HUNK snipped me with his machine gun, you were the one that just fell asleep on the job!

Wesker: I was tranquilized with ten darts out of no where! (gets hit with three tranquilizer darts) What was that? (pulls out one dart) Oh no (passes out)

Chris: We.......(falls asleep after being hit with just one tranq dart)

HUNK: (ties up Chris and Wesker and puts them in a boiling cauldron of chocolate) Here you go Tyrant Wolf, enjoy. (runs off to ride a T-Rex)

Tyrant Wolf: (eats Chris and Wesker)

T-Rex: (gets annoyed by HUNK's machine gun scratching it's head so it halts to a stop causing HUNK to fall then eats him)

**// Back in the Studio //**

Sora: (laughing uncontrollably at the TV which was previewing the Capture the Flag competition)

Sherry: Poor uncle Wesker, he got eaten by Tyrant Wolf

Sianha: (wailing) DADDY!!!!!!!

Claire: It's okay Sianha, look here's a teddy from Tyrant Wolf (gives Siahna the teddy bear)

Siahna: (looks at the teddy and hugs it really tight)

Joshua: (revives Chris, Wesker, Alfred, and HUNK) Alright Chris time to go parachuting.

Chris: Sweet, I've always wanted to parachute!

Sora: Then here's your chute hope the number is okay for you..... it's the only one we had. (hands Chris a parachute labled "13")

Chris: You gave me an unlucky chute

Alexis: Deal with it Chris, now get going (watches Chris leave) Sora did you switch out the chute with silver ware?

Sora: (holding the parachute) Yesh I did and I did switch out the reserve chute as well (holding the reserve chute)

Alexis: Nice

**// In a plane about 30,000 ft in the air //**

Pilot: Is this your first time jumping out of a plane?

Chris: Yeah, I'm excited about this I've always wanted to go parachuting since I was a teenager!

Pilot: Good then you'll like this, just be sure that if your main chute doesn't work you have only a few seconds to pull the reserve, you got that?

Chris: I'm good! (hears a buzzing sound and sees a red light flashing) Hey what's that?

Pilot: You got to jump now! GO!

Chris: Alright! (jumps out of the plane after putting on his parachute) WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHOOOO!!!!!! (get to around 10,000 ft and pulls his chute but only silverware comes out.) NOOOO!!! Wait my reserve! (pulls the reserve and more silverware comes out) NOOO!!!! (dies on impact to the ground then has forks, knives, and spoons impaling his back)

**// Back at the Studio //**

Wesker: That was quite entertaining to watch (brings Chris back to life in the studio with the silverware still in his back)

Chris: AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!! (tries to take out a spoon from his upper shoulder but cringes just by touching the handle)

Siahna: Uncle Chris' is funny (giggling cutely)

Chris: HUH!? (looks at Siahna who looks like a five year old) When did you get older?

Siahna: You were just too busy to notice. (crosses her arms and looks away from Chris)

Steve: So what dance should I do?

Siahna: CARAMELDANSEN!!

Steve: No way

Siahna: DO IT!!! (eyes glow red)

Steve: Yes ma'am! (starts doing the caramel dansen for hours on end)

Sora: (Calls up Hoshi) Hey Hoshi could you do Tyrant Wolf a favor and go to Neptune the planet, okay thanks, (hangs up)

**// On Neptune //**

Hoshi: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T HAVE PEPSI!!!!! THAT'S IT!!!! (eats ten bags of sugar, takes out the controls the Eclipse Cannon and presses the button after twitching uncontrollably)

**// Back at the Studio //**

(a loud explosion is heard in the distance and shook the entire studio)

Leon: What the hell was that?!

Sora: Hoshi on a sugar rush with the controls to the Eclipse Cannon

Hoshi: (comes into the studio) Neptune didn't have any Pepsi. (pouts)

Sora and Alexis: (Gasp)

Hoshi: (passes out from her sugar rush with the controls to the Eclipse Cannon still in her hand)

Wesker: (tempted to take the controls to the cannon)

Sora: Wesker don't even think about taking Hoshi's controls to the Eclipse Cannon or else you won't have you revival powers anymore.

Wesker: Damn it.

Joshua: Time for our next dare from Black Dragon41

_[inserted pink ribbon]_

November is breast cancer awareness month! Now Fundrasers! So i dare Chris,  
Wesker, Krausar, Alfred, Salazar, Irving and Billy to have a competiton in  
fundrasing for Nov. They have to sell chocolate bars (No Chris and Sonic, you  
cannot eat them!), the first person to sell the most gets the grand prize! The  
second place gets thier prize and so on... prizes go to the person that came  
in that place. Good luck! Psstt.(Sell chocolate to fangirls)

1st Grand Prize. An all time and paid for resort to the Hawian islands, with  
3 free nights and $8,000 in spending cash, and can have any three guests along  
for the trip.

2nd prize. Life time supply of the Chocolate bars

3rd prize. $5

4th prize. A Dairy Queen coupon for a free blizzard

5th prize. Throw into a pit of fangirls, EPICALLY!

6th prize. Burned into a crisp with a flamethrower, then ashes fed to the  
neptunes (fish food)

7th prize. Throw into a flaming pit of lickers and hunters, with a barbecue  
porkchop jacket and a broom.

Krauser: Selling chocolate bars? Piece of cake, I could win this with my hands tied behind my back.

Wesker: Care to pull though with that?

Krauser: There's no way in hell I'm going to lose.

Alfred: I will not lose either seeing as that I am quite the lady's man

Salazar: In your dreams maybe

Billy: I hate this month

Chris: Why?

Billy: I had many relatives die of breast cancer on this month.

Irving: I'm so sorry

Alexis: Excuse me, I would like to buy some chocolate bars please (taking out her wallet)

Wesker, Chris, Alfred, Billy, Salazar, Irving, and Krauser: Buy my chocolate!

Alexis: Umm (has an evil smile on her face and looks at Salazar:) I would like to buy some chocolate from you little boy.

Salazar: Okay how many chocolate bars do you want?

Alexis: ten bars please

Salazar: That would be ten dollars. (has the chocolate bars ready)

Alexis: (hands $10) Thanks little boy! (takes her chocolates and leaves)

Salazar: I AM NOT A LITTLE BOY!!!!!!!

Sora: Toughen up, you're in the lead and get out of here and go sell more chocolates before the rest of the competition gets ahead of you. (sees that everyone in the competition with Salazar left the studio)

// Several hours later //

Billy, Wesker, Chris, Alfred, Salazar, Irving, and Krauser: (came back with boxes of money and leftover chocolate)

Sora: (sees that Alfred and Krauser looking like they were in a mosh pit) What the hell happened to you two?

Alfred and Krauser: We tried to sell chocolate bars at a bar and well.... things didn't go exactly the way we planned.

Salazar: Little girls tried the same thing and fake cried when Krause told them to get out of the bar so they could sell chocolate thus causing everyone to fight.

Billy: I think I sold over 1,000 chocolate bars

Wesker: Damn you Coen.

Joshua: I got all the results; Billy: 1,765, Wesker: 987, Salazar: 657, Irving: 554, Krauser: 234, Alfred: 108, and Chris: 3.

Alfred: At least I didn't get last place

Alexia: But you got second to last, that's completely unacceptable!!!!

Alfred: I'm sorry my dear Alexia. Please forgive me!

Sora: She can forgive you later time to be fed to the Neptunes! (takes out her flamethrower and burn Alfred to a crips, sweeps up his ashes and feed them to the Neptunes which stayed away from the ashes.

Alexis: Chris here's your BBQ porkchop jacket and a broom (hands Chris the jacket and a broom)

Chris: Umm is this the new style?

Siahna: Yeah and over in that pit is where a bunch of photographers want to take your picture.

Chris: Thanks Siahna (lightly pats her on the head and walks in the pit) HOLY S*** NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! (dies at the claws of the Lickers and Hunters)

Joshua: Lucky Lickers and Hunters, I wanted some meat too.

Sora: Here's some chinchilla blood if that makes you feel better? (hands Joshua some chinchilla blood)

Joshua: Thanks Sora. (takes the blood) Also Billy you have won the grand prize to Hawaii and can take three guests with you along with $8,000 spending money for three night.

Billy: Awesome!!!!

Wesker: Can I give my prize to someone else, I'm not a fan of chocolate.

Sora: Sure, give it to whoever you want (has a gleam in her eyes pratically saying "GIVE IT TO ME")

Wesker: I'll be sending this to my cousin.

Everyone in the studio: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wesker: Just kidding, here Sora (gives Sora his life-time supply of chocolate)

Sora: You made a joke?? Oh well as long as I have my chocolate (revives Chris and Alfred) Now lets make Alfred and Chris suffer more.

Chris and Alfred: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (runs into a random room)

Sora: (grabs her flamethrower and goes to the room) Hello boys, meet your worst nightmare. (eats ten bars of chocolate and starts twitching) WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (starts burning everything in the room along with Chris and Alfred)

Alexis: Time to EPICALLY get thrown to your fangirls (picks up Krauser with one hand and throws him into the pit of his fangirls)

Krauser: How did you do that?!

Krauser fangirls: IT'S KRAUSER!!!!!!!!!!!! GET HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (death glomps Krauser)

Krauser: Get off of me!!!! (dies from death glomp)

Irving: A Dairy Queen coupon for a blizzard doesn't seem that bad.

Salazar: I got $5

Rebecca: Just be glad that you didn't have to go through what Chris and Alfred had to go through

Salazar: Good point Ms. Chambers

Alexis: Time for our next dare from Multiverse Fan..... sweet another new reviewer!

_Im new to fan fiction and i saw this fic and i was laughing so hard so i  
decide to give a simple dare. I dare chris to give Sora al ot of sugary treats  
and i dare Wesker to give Joshua ultra rare steak good luck with the results  
:)_

Wesker: (revives Chris) Chris you have to give Sora sugary treats

Chris: NOOO!!!! I don't want to see those results

Wesker: Too bad Christopher (hands Chris a ton of sugary treats) have fun

Alexis: Time for me to go to Sora's and Joshua's secret bomb shelter (leaves)

Chris: Sora, here's some sweets (hesitantly hands Sora the sugary sweets)

Sora: Thanks Chris! (eats the sweets)

Wesker: Joshua, here's some ultra rare steaks

Joshua: Wesker, you're a good man and yet this was the worst mistake you made (eats the steak)

Sora and Joshua: (go crazy and start going on a killing spree)

Chris: (dives into the trashcan bombshelter) OH GOD NO, NOT YOU (sees the Tails Doll in Wesker's old black now demonic looking throne)

Tails Doll Cultists: We have got a sacrifice for you Oh Mighty Tails Doll

Chris: NOOO!!!!

Tails Doll: I want my sacrifice (takes out a kitchen knife)

Tails Doll Cultists: (starts chanting "Can You Feel the Sunshine" as soon as the Tails Doll starts killing Chris)

// After many deaths and explosions //

Sora and Joshua: What happened?

Alexis: You two went crazy and killed everyone except Chris who was killed by a demonic Tails Doll. What was that about?

Sora: I converted the trashcan shelter to the Tails Doll Cult to use on Chris who fears the doll, that's why I left you a note saying to use the newest bombshelter.

Alexis: Ohh that's why, thanks for the warning (revives everyone that died)

Sora: Time for the next dare and torture from Axeleonth

_This is great. I normally don't review cause I usually read using my phone.  
Anyway, I'd like to contribute._

Steve is back alive btw, if he isn't already.  
Claire: You must tell Steve why you have betrayed him and gone out with  
Albert Wesker.

Leon: You get to go through Resident Evil 4 again, but this time, Ada won't  
help you, oh and you have switched roles with Ashley.

Wesker: You have to not be evil for a whole chapter, cause you're awesome.

Rebecca Chambers: You have to tell everyone why you have run into hiding,  
except everytime you would say the word "I", you say sausage.

Then all the main characters, have to go through all the main RE games in  
order, except when someone dies, you have to start everything again.

Except Jill, she can punch Excella in the gut cause she is a ** and then slap  
Wesker as many times as you want.

Finally, I'd like to go on a blind date with any of the Resident Evil female  
character, cause I'm a guy.

And... Alfred, confess you're love for Alexia.

Steve: Claire I demand to know why you betrayed me and gone out with Wesker

Claire: I've always had a crush on Wesker that's why I went out with him!

Steve: Great I lost my first love to a sociopath.

Claire and Siahna: Take that back! (punches and kicks Steve)

Leon: Great I have to be the damsel in distress

Sora: I hate to do this but you literally are going to be the damsel (makes Ashely and Leon switch bodies)

Leon and Ashley: WTF!!!!!!??

Joshua and Alexis: Have fun! (sends off Ashley and Leon back into RE4)

Sora: While they're gone onto the next one......damn this may be a difficult one for Wesker

Wesker: Why's that?

Alexis: You can't be evil for a whole chapter

Wesker: Ohh well, I can be with Claire and Siahna for the duration of my dare.

Joshua: Ohh well Rebecca time for your dare.

Rebecca: But I don't want to!

Joshua: (brings out his licker tongue) DO IT!!!!

Rebecca: Okay, okay..... (takes a deep breath) The reason why sausage had to go and hide was that sausage was scared and panicked about the situation sausage was in and sausage was the only one of my team alive.

Sora: Alright main characters time to go through all of the main RE games in order but there's a twist if someone dies you have to do everything over again enjoy! (sends everyone off to do the RE games)

// Several hours later //

All Main RE Characters: (came back and looking pissed off)

Alexis: (eating a chocolate bar) What's the matter? Not happy to relive your zombie glory days?

All Main RE Characters: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alexis: Sheesh I was just asking (sees Leon and Ashley come back in) Hey Ashey, Leon how was your role switch (quickly switches them back to their original bodies)

Leon: Not good, I hated being the one who constantly gets captured

Ashley: And I hated how much Leon had to kill, geez were those Verdugos enough no there just had to be novistadors, more zealots, ganado, and regenerators!!

Sora: Now you know how eachother feels about their original roles in RE4, Jill go ahead and punch Excella as many times as you want and slap Wesker as many times as you want.

Wesker: That would be highly inadvisable Ms. Valentine.

Jill: Shut it you psychopathic maniac (slaps Wesker across the face and recieved "ohhs" from Siahna)

Siahna: You slapped Daddy, that's not a good thing to do.

Wesker: Valentine, you should really wish you hadn't done that (punches Jill away from him and into Excella)

Excella: Ohh no

Jill: Ohh yes, this is for ordering me around in Africa! (punches Excella in the gut over 100 times)

Sora: Now for the last of his dare, Ada your the lucky woman who gets to go on a date with Axeleonth.

Ada: Fine I'll do it (gets send to Axeleonth by Sora to go on the date.)

Alfred: I admit it I'm in love with Alexia, I've been in love with her for years! (gets bashed in the head by Alexis holding a mace)

Alexis: No twincest! Twincest is a very bad no-no! (continues to bash Alfred in the head with the bloody mace)

Joshua: Did you have a problem with twincest before?

Alexis: yes in the future back in my school that was pratically the student body since most of them were either twins or triplets and very few single borns. and most of the student body accused me and my twin brother of it.

Sora: You're a twin?

Alexis: Yep but he wanted to stay home with our parents.

Joshua: Thanks for telling us that part of your history but now that's all for ch.14, hope you like this chapter and send in more dares to torment the RE Cast.

Sora: For the closer here's the Zombie Dance Team doing ballroom dancing!

(the Zombie Dance Team begins to find a partner and starts ballroom dancing along with pretty music)


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil I just own my OCs**

Sora: Welcome back to Resident Evil Truth or Dare, I'm your host Sora Avalon and here helping me out is my two co-hosts Alexis and Joshua Norris...... hey I just realized, Alexis I didn't get your full name, what is it?

Alexis: I can't tell you cuz it would disrupt the future but enough chit-chat our first dare is from ClaireRedfield'sbestfriend

_I dare the whole resident evil cast to play a football game. Winners of the  
football game get to watch as the losers get thrown to the fans.  
I dare Claire and Wesker to go on a double date with Chris and Jill, wesker  
cannot hurt Chris.  
I dare Sheva to kill Irving as many times as she wants, Irving cannot fight  
back.(not that it would make a difference anyway)  
I dare Brad to fight Krauser, Krauser has to keep one arm behind his back to  
make it fair for Brad._

Joshua: Time for football people!!

Enrico: It's been a while since I played football

Forest: Yeah it sure has, I remember when we used to have annual football matches between the Bravo and Alpha teams to see which team had better team cooperation

Brad: We would always lose and Captain Wesker made us run around the football field as punishment for not showing 110% of our abilities.

Jill: Yeah I hated that! After those laps my legs felt like jelly

Rebecca: haha sucked to be you guys

Frost: Shut up Chambers!!!

Sora: Enough talking get to the field!!! (sends the RE Cast to the field)

Joshua: Time to play football, everyone get into teams of two; Team Biohazard and Team BSAA. Children you will have to sit in the stands. That means you too Salazar

Salazar: I AM NOT A CHILD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Siahna: Aww, I want to play with mommy and daddy (sits in the stands with Sherry, Lott, Lily, and Salazar.)

// Several moments later (A/N: Since I don't care much about football nor know about it I'm skipping time) //

Joshua: Team Biohazard won the match, though they had the advantage of having people with mutated DNA and powers on their side.

Chris: That should be a foul!! Our team doesn't have those special powers except for Steve!

Steve: yeah and even with my powers I couldn't possibly beat Saddler, Wesker, Sergei, William, and Nemesis!

Sora: too bad now Team BSAA time to get thrown to your fangirls!!! (presses a button labled "Send to Fanpit" and Team BSAA gets sent into the fangirl pit)

Team Biohazard: (watches from lawnchairs eating popcorn and enjoying the show)

Alexis: good thing you're enjoying the show but now its time to go back and finish off the rest of the dares. (sends everyone back as soon as the fangirls were finished)

Claire: This is not going to end well

Chris: You got that right Claire

Jill: Something tells me that this isn't going to be good

Sora: Time to go on your double date (pushes Claire, Wesker, Chris and Jill out of the studio)

**// Out Somewhere in the City //**

Jill: This is really awkward. (somewhat hiding her face from people staring at them)

Wesker: Just ignore them Ms. Valentine (takes a drink of his water)

Claire: Chris just deal with the fact that Albert and I love eachother very much

Chris: I will not deal with the fact that you have completely lost your mind!

Wesker: Christopher I would advise you not to attempt to insult my _girlfriend's_ intelligence

Chris: You're just going out with my sister to spite me!

Jill: Chris calm down, people are watching.

Claire: Chris, stop trying to make a scene.

Manager of the cafe: Excuse me miss, if you cannot control your boyfriend then I have to ask you to leave.

Jill: We might as well leave Chris isn't going to calm down anytime soon (drags Chris off and is followed by Wesker and Claire back to the studio)

**// Back in the Studio //**

Jill: Chris for once could you be a gentleman and put aside your rivalry with Wesker and enjoy a date! It was bad enough to suffer public humiliation but to be kicked out of a nice cafe because of your fit that's a whole 'nother problem

Chris: Jill I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you I promise.

Jill: You had better or else I'll sic Trisha on you!

Chris: NOO!!!! (runs to hide)

Sheva: It's about time I get to kill that little weasil. (grabs the nearest gun from the Wall of Weapons and shoots Irving until he's nothing but a wet pile of red jello.)

Brad: Please let's make this a fair fight (holds up his fists shaking like a leaf)

Krauser: Sure (puts his right arm behind his back and uses his mutated arm to kill Brad) the dare didn't specify which arm I couldn't use.

Alexis: Nice one, and now the next dare is from LScollard

_Very funny._

Wesker/Claire. Make me Sianha's Godfather, i'm great with kids and I'll do  
anything to prove.

Everybody. Go through all the games scripts with your emotions stripped from  
you.

Wesker. Kill Chris as times as you want in front of Sianha.

Chris. Bend down and let's everyone you killed kick your ** in.

Capcom. Make Resident Evil 6 with Wesker in it. (not dead)

Wesker/Chris/Claire/Sianha. Play an friendly game of Monopoly.

Sianha. Age normally.

That's it.

Wesker: LScollard I'm afriad you're going to have to prove yourself to be Sianha's godfather

Sora: Ohh this is going to be good, everyone has to go through all the game scripts with all emotions stripped from them. (uses her authoress powers to take away their emotions for the duration of their dare)

// Many game scripts later //

Alexis: that was the most horrible moment of my life

Sora: You can say that again Alexis (gives everyone back their emotions)

Alexia: THANK YOU!!!!!

Jill: Why did Capcom make the scripts like that? Why couldn't the writers actually make us with emotions.

Wesker: Good thing that my dare allows me to take out some frustration, Siahna time to watch your Uncle Chris get killed.

Siahna: YAY!!!!!! (clapping wildly)

Chris: Siahna why do you hate me?

Siahna: Dunno, daddy hates you so I hate you too!

Chris: Now that explains things (suddenly gets Wesker's hand impaled through his chest.)

Wesker: (removes his hand and cleans the blood off of his gloved hand and revives Chris)

Chris: OW!! That hurt...... Wesker what are you doing with that? (sees Wesker hiding something behind his back)

Wesker: What am I doing with what Chris? (acting innocent)

Chris: You know what Wesker

Siahna: Daddy doesn't have anything uncle Chris

Chris: Yes he does and you know it

Wesker: (takes out a machete and does things that make the scene to gory for this fic)

Siahna: (laughing and obviously enjoying the torture her uncle had to go through)

Sora: Umm for Capcom's dare, I have no control of what the company does but it would be totally awesome if they made and RE6 and for your last one time to play Monopoly Wesker, Claire, Siahna and Chris... oops gotta revive him (revives Chris)

// After some time //

Siahna: Yes I won, (jumps up on her feet and does a victory dance)

Claire: Great job sweetie.

Chris: How did we lose to a five year old

Siahna: Unlike normal children my mind is twice as more advanced than the average child and thanks to daddy I've been getting home schooled like a college student.

Chris: Wesker, why are you teaching Sianha college based stuff and not normal grade school education?

Wesker: Siahna isn't like normal children and as she said herself her mind is much more advanced than the average child.

Chris: Claire didn't you do anything about this?

Claire: I tried but didn't win the arguement

Joshua: At least Siahna will be the youngest girl to graduate from college, even younger than Alexia when she graduated.

Alexia: HEY!!!

Alexis: Oh be quite it will still be awhile if Siahna does decide to go to college and now our next dare is from Dragonclaw-Phoenixstar1017

_Hi,first time I've reviewed ,here are my dares:  
Chris:I enjoy others pain,but none more so than yours,so,get attacked by my  
army of unstoppable my pets,two demon cats,will come after you  
and only I can stop them.  
Wesker:Face me in my most powerful form,Dark Dragon!!Not even you can stop  
me!To make more fun,I'm on a candy high,which is bad news for you.I might not  
be a scary as Sora but you will still wet your pants.  
Joshua:Kiss Sora again.I'm not going to give any dares of pain upon  
yourself,but I do enjoy seeing couples in ToD fics!  
Sora:After Joshua is done,can you take care of some of my pets?They are a  
dragon,a cerberus(yes I have a cerberus as a pet),and my two other demon  
cats,they're names are Treetail and 't worry they are all tame,so  
they will listen to your evey command,unless I say they can' has my  
other two demon how,enjoy them and keep them for a long as you want.  
Frost:Try to to flirt with me(no one tell him I'll go Dark Dragon on him)  
Claire:Let me,in my normal form,hold your child.  
Leon:Boom.  
Jill:You have two options:give me some candy and soda(really bad combo for  
me),or choice.  
Well,bye,that was a long review.  
Dragonclaw._

Chris: Unstoppable what?

Sora: Dragons and two demon cats!

Dragons and Demon Cats: (appear out of nowhere and kills Chris)

Wesker: I'm really not going to like this aren't I?

Siahna: Nope you sure aren't dad,

Dragonclaw-Phoenixstar1017: (appears in her Dark Dragon form on a sugar rush)

Wesker: S*** (tries to run knowing what's good for him after seeing Sora on many sugar rushes)

Dragonclaw-Phoenixstar1017: (catches Wesker and burns him to a crisp then leaves)

Joshua: time for my dare

Sora: (mumbles "not again" then gets pulled to Joshua and got kissed)

Alexis: (smacks Joshua over the head with a rolled up newspaper) Dare over for you Mr. Norris.

Sora: Yay I get to take care of four more pets, now Kasai and Mizu won't be lonely (sees Kasai trying to eat Mizu) Kasai NO!!! (stops Kasai) Bad dragon, no eating my chao! (chuddles her neutral chao)

Frost: I like Dragonclaw-Phoenixstar1017 she a nice girl and her name is soo pretty.

Dragonclaw-Phoenixstar1017: (appears once more and kills him in Dark Dragon form for trying to flirt with her)

Claire: You can hold Siahna, she already like you.

Siahna: You awesome as a dragon!

Dragonclaw-Phoenixstar1017: Thank you (holds Siahna in normal form)

Jill: Ohh god, I don't know which to chose; give the authoress candy or die? Death sounds awefully inviting right now (just falls backwards and convientely lands on a bed of spikes)

Alexis: Time to see the doctor about that wound (drags the bed of spikes to the doctor's office)

Dr. T-002: (just looks at Jill, pokes her slowly dying body and hands her off to the Hunter Nurse)

Hunter Nurse: (lightly glazes chocolate on Jill and eats her)

Alexis: (peeks in the office to see Jill being eaten and goes back to Sora and the others) Jill's dead onto the next dare.

Sora: Right, now next is from The True One

_hello!! im back i dare alfred to admit his gay or else he has to jump into a  
pit of lava and brad can have three wishes (For the eyes of joshua and sora  
only: Every thing he wishes has to be the opposite)_

Alfred: Well I just admit that I love my sister so I guess I have to jump into a pit of lava (all of a sudden the ground under his feet disappears and falls into a pit a lava)

Sora: One down, now Brad you get three wishes chose wisely for they will affect you greatly.

Brad: I wish to be stronger than anyone in this studio

Alexis: Damn he didn't take anytime to think that over

Sora: Your wish is our command.....for now (makes Brad the weakest person in the room.)

Brad: Why am I so weak!?

Sora: A short in the wish, but onto your second wish.

Brad: I wish I wasn't afraid of everything anymore.

Joshua: You got that (uses powers to make Brad even more afraid of everything)

Brad: AAAAHH!!! A LICKER!!!! (runs and hides in a broom closet)

Alexis: (laughing at Brad's new fear) Now that is gold!

Brad: I wish the licker would go away

Alexis: This I'm going to do (makes more Lickers appear) The lickers are gone Brad!

Brad: (comes out only to faint from seeing many lickers in front of the closet he hid in)

Alexis: While Brad recovers from his new fear of lickers our last dare for this chapter is from vintage87

_i dare leon and jill to get marry and no one can object and they cant devours_

Sora: I really hate to do this but ZOMBIE PRIEST WE NEED YOU ONCE MORE!!! (throws the shaking Brad to the zombie priest)

Zombie Priest: (eats Brad) Thanks now Jill Valentine do you take Leon S. Kennedy to be your husband?

Jill: As much as I don't want to I have to say yes.

Zombie Priest: Do you Leon S. Kennedy take Jill Valentine as your wife.

Leon: I do (reluctantly says)

Zombie Priest: I pronounce you husband and wife. (leaves to who-knows-where)

Jill: This is probably not going to go well

Leon: You could say that again..... where's the marriage certificate?

Sora: Don't ask me I don't have it... Kasai what are you eating? (sees Kasai in his cage eating paper) I think that may answer the question

Kasai: (burps up a piece of paper which was a love note from Chris to Jill)

Alexis: Umm Sora, this is Chris' love letter to Jill.

Sora: Ohh well now to close this chapter the Zombie Dance Team is going to do an interpretive dance to "Mermaid" by Shinatani Hitomi.

Zombie Dance Team: (begins dancing as soon as the music starts)

Joshua, Sora, and Alexis: Hope you like this chapter. Send in more dares!


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil I just own my OCs**

Sora: Hey all, welcome back to the Resident Evil Truth or Dare

Joshua: We have more reviews and Wesker has just became enemies with Alexis!

Sora: When did that happen?

Joshua: When Wesker called her an idiot for going swimming in the Neptune tank and having lunch with Dr. T002, the Hunter Nurse and Patricia.

Sora: What's wrong with that?

Jill: It just so happened that the main dish of their lunch was the octapi and Chris was the dessert.

Sora: Ohh....well now lets get this chapter started with our first dare from LDLR

_Lily:Yay! I'm bettah now! And for some reason I feel generous and caring...  
Gah! WHAT THE HECK IS HAPPENING TO ME! *grabs her face* I don't know who I am  
anymore!  
*her dark attire turns all rich nice and humble with a white Lily sticking  
out of her hair*  
Lillian:*sweet voice*Hello everyone I am Lillian and I shall be your reviewer  
for this time.I dare you to have the first ever Art olympics after that you  
guys shall do a cooking will be a field trip to Japan then Europe  
then U.S. that a lunch break food by yours truly it will be consisted  
of steak crumpets tea and for dessert Strawberry shortcake well that's all for  
now and I will be staying here till my counterpart returns as they say in  
Japan!  
JA NE! *waves goodbye*_

Alexis: Lily, come back! (dramatically falls to her knees)

Siahna: Alexi it'll be okay (pats Alexis' shoulder)

Alexis: Thanks Siahna, like the dare says time for the first ever Art Olympics and a cooking show then a field trip to Japan, Europe and the U.S.A.

Excella: Why is it that we now have to compete in an Art Olympics?

Sora: Cuz the dare said so. Time to get working.

(After a while most of the RE cast made works of art; Excella made a life sized stature of Wesker, Claire created a glass pane of Siahna with only minimal damage to her hands, Wesker painted Alexis and Sora being massacred by licker betas, Leon made small figurines of Ada and Sora, Siahna mashed pieces of materials together, Ada made a steel butterfly, Chris created a colague of pharmacutical company logos and Sheva used twigs, leaves, and vines to make a basket.)

Alexis: Now time for the cooking show...... wait since Leon is cooking maybe he'll make his lobster.

Sora: YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That lobster was soooooo delicious.

Leon: (made his lobster seasoned with a dash of fresh lemon juice)

Wesker: (cooked steak which surprisingly been cut like it was butter and seasoned with whatever adds flavor to the steaks)

(A/N: I do not know how to do cooking shows, I've never watched them and if I did I couldn't pay attention to the directions)

// After some time //

Lillian: Time to go on a field trip to Japan.

Alexis: You scare me! (hides behind Sora and Joshua)

Sora: Don't worry Lily will return soon (pats Alexis on the head)

Alexis: But so much happiness in one person.......so much like high school....DON'T MAKE ME GO BACK!!!!!! (shaking Sora and Joshua)

Joshua: Alexis relax will you?

Wesker: She obviously has way too many psychological problems

Alexia: Just be glad that she doesn't decide to go rampant on everyone here. (whispers to Wesker)

Yoko: I got everything packed for our three field trips (has many bags behind her)

Lillian: Good, now lets get going and have fun.

// Three field trips later //

Yoko: Japan was so exciting

Saddler: Europe was much better

Leon: I like the states

Sora: I'm caught between Japan and Europe

Alexis: the people in Madrid were nice to me and gave me gifts (holds up hand-made dolls)

Siahna: I got this cool mask (holds a masquerade mask to her face)

Joshua: People kept running away from me, I think some of the Japanese people were screaming "Biohazard's real! Run for your lives!"

Jill: Isn't Biohazard a game in Japan?

Sora: Yes its the Japanese verson of Resident Evil and if you'll excuse me Lillian I'm going to make sure that Joshua doesn't get near the steak.

Joshua: Damnit! (takes some crumpets and a bottle of a random animal's blood)

Wesker: Lillian considering Sora's tendency to get sugar high don't you think it's a good idea to keep her away from the shortcake?

Sora: (holds a gun to Wesker's temple) Shut it Wesker

Lillian: Put that gun away Sora!

Sora: (grumbles incoherently as she puts her guns back in its holster) Also just to let everyone know with cake I would need about five pieces in order to get a sugar rush and my cake limit is two and a half.

RE Cast: (sighs in relief)

Alexis: But that doesn't mean anything. (eating steak and a third piece of strawberry shortcake)

Chris: What are you talking about Alexis?

Alexia: Are you implying that you too get sugar rushes?

Alexis: I did not say that whatsoever

Siahna: That means she does (elegantly sips her tea)

Salazar: What's your limit of cake?

Alexis: Well I don't know, but I do remember that on my 5th birthday I accidentally ate my whole entire birthday cake then went sugar high for the rest of the day if that answers your question.

Saddler: Oh no.

Siahna: What happened while you were sugar high?

Alexis: All I remember was running out of my house laughing like a maniac then being returned home by the cops and I was chewing on one of the cop's legs while twitching uncontrollably. My brother was soo embarrassed at the scene but even he had to admit it was a highlight of his life.

Forest: No (weakly says and slowly starts edging away from Alexis since he was the closest to her)

Enrico: Um since you also get sugar rushes why don't you lay off the cake for a bit?

Alexis: (eats the rest of her third piece of cake) sure, the strawberry is really starting to overpower the taste of the steak.

Lillian: Well its time for me to leave Ja ne. (leaves)

Sora: Adios! Now time for our next dare which is from vintage87

_hi its me again i have dares OK sora you get to marry any won you want in the  
studio except Wesker my 2 dare is Jill and Leon have to get married and no one  
can object dare 3 Alexis you get to torture the re cast any way you want to  
except Claire and siahna_

Sora: Leon! (hugs his arm) Zombie Priest here's (looks around and sees Salazar) the midget! (throws the midget to the Zombie Priest)

Zombie Priest: (eats Salazar) Thanks now who is getting married?

Leon: me and Sora.

Jill: Then it has to be me and Leon, though I don't know why since we never met eachother in the games or movies.

Sora: on second though Leon marry Jill first then I'll get a lawyer.

Leon: Alright (seemed unsure) but aren't Jill and I already married?

Zombie Priest: yes you two are.

Alexis: We never did find that certificate of marriage

Sora: That's right, where is it? (sees Dragon's cerberus eating an envelope) Cerberus, what are you eating? (takes the paper to see part of the work "marriage") found it, and since Jill and Leon have been married since last chapter the marriage is void and I get to marry him!

Zombie Priest: Alright, now Sora Avalon do you take Leon S. Kennedy to be your husband and Leon do you take Sora to be your wife?

Sora and Leon: I do

Zombie Priest: You may now kiss the bride.

Leon: (kisses Sora)

Alexis: (takes a quick picture) This is a good time (puts the picture in her pocket) Now time for my reign of torture mwahahhahahaha [insert thunder and lightning]

Claire: is there a storm or was that just en effect?

Alexis: An effect now Claire Siahna I suggest you find someplace far away from me while I unleash my torture on the rest of the RE cast.

Claire: Let's go Siahna

Siahna: okay but Alexi videotape Frost's and Chris' torture for me.

Alexis: Don't worry I will

// After Alexis' Reign of Torture (the torture was too gruesome for this fic) //

Alexis: Now I feel happy inside (lays back on a lawn chair.)

Sora: Damn Alexis you really don't kid around when it comes to torture.

Alexis: My mom said the same thing when I told her about the time a guy had kissed me and I scarred him for life as revenge.

Joshua: Now that the torture is done (revives the RE cast) the next dare is from sweetman12345

_i have another dare i want 1 full hour of peace and then good and evil get on  
separate sides and have a full out war_

Sora: ohh boy... Joshua does this dare apply to us?

Joshua: I'm not even sure about that, how about you Alexis?

Alexis: I think we're neutral when the all out war happens but until then..... RE CAST TIME FOR PEACE!!!!! (cuddling Kasai, Dragon's Cerberus and two demon cats)

Wesker: This is going to be a long hour

Marcus: As long as I got my leeches I'll be just fine (admiring his leeches)

Sergei: I've noticed something, the time I was here I come to realize that my Ivans are no where in this studio.

Sora: Ohh the Ivans, well Sergei I'm afraid they had to "leave" us for a while.

Sergei: What do you mean by "leave"?

Alexis: Sora put them in cryostasis cuz they tried to kill her when you were forced to come here.

Sergei: (looks steaming mad)

Joshua: Ah ah ah, no disrupting the peace.

Siahna: This is no fun, I can't torment Uncle Chris or Frost. (crosses her arms and pouts)

Wesker: Don't worry Siahna (picks her up) When the war starts you can torment them all you want.

Siahna: Yes!

// One Hour Later //

Alexis: The hour of peace is over! Time for Good to go on one side and Evil on the other (directing to where the good and evil guys go)

Joshua: Weapons will be place on each side though for the bad guys I don't think the weapons will be neccesary

Sora: Have fun, kill eachother, Sherry, Lott, Lily, and Siahna come with us so you kids can watch the action from our new bombshelter.

Siahna: But I want to be in the war!

Claire: Siahna, go with Sora now.

Siahna: Yes mother. (goes with Sora along with Sherry, Lott, and Lily.)

Alexis: BEGIN THE WAR!!!! (runs out of the line of fire and hides in the new bomb shelter with Sora, Joshua, and the kids)

// After the War //

Joshua: And it seems that Evil triumphed over Good (came out of the bomb shelter with Sora, Alexis, and the children)

Siahna: Father, did you spare mom?

Wesker: Yes I did

Claire: That war was relentless, we never stood a chance.

Sora: Well duh, the majority of the bad guys are mutated by a virus or parasite, of course they'd win. (revives the good guys)

Alexis: That's soo very true but now onto the next dare from Black Dragon41

_I dare Chris to have Amnesia and random-timing Anxiety attacks._

I dare Saddler to take banjo lessons, then he must preform on stage in front  
of all of the R.E casts. If more than half like the preformance, then he wins  
a new 2008 Chevy Silverado. If they don't, then he has to donate $39,817 to  
the Umbrella daycare center.

I dare Wesker to adopt two fluffy and cute kittens: The fisrt one is  
completely black and named Death (It has red beaming eyes and an unquenchable  
thirst for Chris-ish flesh.) The second one is orange and named Wisker (It too  
has red beaming eyes and has an unquenchable thirst for Chris-ish flesh.) Take  
good care of them for me. :)

Sora: This ought to be good (uses her authoress powers to give Chris amnesia and anxiety attacks)

Chris: Who are you? Where am I? How'd I get here? I'm scared!! (panicking in a corner)

Alexis: (rolling on the ground laughing) That is priceless!!!

Joshua: While Chris is trying to figure out his problems and deal with his anxiety attacks which we do not know when they'll occur Saddler here's a banjo. (hands Saddler a banjo.)

Saddler: I don't know how to play this infernal instrument. (about to throw it away until Sora stops him)

Sora: Saddler this is why your dare also included banjo lessons.

Saddler: Damn

Sora: And just for this moment I managed to find someone to be able to teach you how to play the banjo. (opens a random door to reveal an old man in ragged old clothing and had a long beard)

Leon: I don't even want to know how you find these guys Sora.

Sora: Good, then you just saved yourself from being mildly disturbed.

Old Man: Alrighty Sara, who's my student?

Sora: My name is SORA!!! And here's your student right here (pulls Saddler next to her)

Old Man: But he's in a bath robe, you said that he was a monk Cici.

Sora: I did not say he was a monk, I said 'I need you to teach Osmund Saddler, who is a cult leader, how to play the banjo', also I must say this again MY NAME IS SORA!!!!!

Old Man: Okay Ceira I understand, now Sader time to teach you the history of the banjo.

Saddler: My name is Osmund Saddler

Sora: and my name is SORA!!!!!!!

Joshua: Sora just leave the man along and let him do his job.

Sora: I'm paying that old man $250 just to teach Saddler to play the banjo and now I don't think it's worth it.

Alexis: Why did you hire him? Why not hire a youth?

Sora: I held audition and that man can play like he played since he was an infant.

Saddler: I don't need to know the damn history about this instrument! I need to know how to play!!

Old Man: Well Ozzy if you want to play so bad then start playing.

Saddler: I DON'T KNOW HOW!!!!

Old Man: Then shut your trap and listen to me, cuz I'm an expert.

Saddler: You haven't shown me a scrap of evidence that you play the damn banjo!

Old Man: Oh I'll show you (pulls out his banjo that was strapped to his back and played like it was nothing.)

Saddler: I apologize sir.

Wesker: Sora, why is it that he keeps forgetting your name?

Sora: He's old, senile, it's not his fault but it starts to annoy the crap out of me when he continues to get my name wrong after telling him what it is over 50 times.

Saddler: Okay I think I'm getting it (plays a few notes before getting hit over the head with a cane.) What the f*** was that for?!

Old Man: You can play better than that Ozzy Sader! Right now you're bring down the name of the banjo!

Saddler: I'm just a beginner and my name is Osmund Saddler.

// An indefinite period of time passes //

Old Man: Well Saline, I did my best but Ozzy was not my best student. Now give me my $250.

Sora: My name is Sora, and you only said $200

Old Man: I did?

Sora: Yes you did (puts $200 in the man's hand and ushers him out of the door)

Alexis: You conned him out of $50.

Sora: I need that $50 for Hoshi's birthday present.

Wesker: Oh God, I forgot Hoshi's birthday. (smack himself on the forehead.)

Sora: That is why I needed the money, Hoshi's present costs this much. (leaves to make a purchase)

Wesker: S*** what am I going to get my cousin for her birthday.

Alexis: You can't go wrong with guns.

Chris: (starts hypervenalating all of a sudden)

Jill and Trisha: Chris what's wrong?! BACK OFF HE'S MINE!!

Alexis: Girls let the man have some breathing room.

Trisha: Chris is mine!

Jill: No he's not, he's still a free man!

Chris: Who are you women?

Trisha: I'm your wife Trisha, don't you remember sweetie?

Jill: Don't believe her, she's just a crazed fangirl.

Alexis: Do I have to put you two in solitary confinement and make you two hold hands?

Jill and Trisha: NO!

Alexis: Then leave Chris alone for a bit!

Mendez: Quiet you fools, Lord Saddler's performance is about to start.

Sora: Just in time (comes back and sits down on a lawn chair.)

Salazar: I've never seen Lord Saddler ever play an instrument before

Random Ganado: Let's see how well he plays.

Saddler: (begins playing the banjo semi-good and semi-horrible)

(half of the RE cast applauded for the performance while the other half didn't and jeered at him)

Alexis: Wow, I guess Saddler doesn't win his prize or donate so his dare ended up being a lose-lose situation.

Saddler: Damnit I wanted that Chevy to convince Sora to join me.

Sora: I don't want a truck and even if I did I would never join you.

(Then all of a sudden two red eyed cats attack Chris and eat him)

Wesker: My cats are here, I love them already.

Siahna: Aww they're so cute! (cuddles the Death and Whiskers after they ate Chris' vital organs)

Joshua: (revives Chris) Sora you better hope they don't pick a fight with Dragon's Cerberus.

Sora: Don't worry I got him, (holding back Cerberus from going after Death and Whiskers) Wesker, Death and Whiskers are your responsibility so make sure they don't wreak my studio.

Wesker: No promises Avalon.

Sora: Gee thanks Wesker, now our next dare is from Dragonclaw-Phoenixstar1017

_Hi guys!I'm back!!Now for one I enjoy this but must also review.  
Jill:You should've givin the candy and soda.I'm going to give you the most  
painful death I can think of!  
Chris:Go against my unstoppable DRAGON ARMY!!The only weapon you can use is  
blood.  
Sora:I'm so sorry I dumped my demon cats on you!Thornpaw is going to have  
Leaftail's kids!Again I'm so sorry!  
Joshua:Here is some dragon was from an outsider from my realm.  
Everyone(Including the hosts):Go to my you will be shown the  
way to the castle by the worker dragons.I have some dares for you to exacute  
there:  
Wesker:Be covered in I will smell not and you  
suffer a terrible death.  
Claire:You are givin full access to the castle.  
Siahna:Since you are the child of a human and villian,you can have a pet  
's common for lesser dragons to become pets.  
Oh,and if any of you are wondering what creature I am,I'm ,you  
can just call me full name is too long to write out all the  
time.(Sits on bed full of lickers and is not attacked)Hmm,wonder wh they won't  
hurt me?Oh well.I have a ToD fic to get back ya!  
Dragon_

Jill: No (weakly says and silently prays that it won't last long then dies an excrutiatingly painful death)

Chris: What dragon army? Who's Dragon? Why do I have this blood? (holding a jug of bad blood)

Dragon Army: (attacks Chris and kills him but then get ill from the bad blood and leave)

Sora: It's okay Dragon I love cats especially when they're not normal and your cerberus is behaving.

Joshua: (tastes the dragon blood) Mmm, delicious...got any more?

Sora: Time to go to Dragon's kingdom! (uses her authoress powers to go to Dragon's Kingdom.)

**// Dragon's Kingdom //**

Sora: This place is awesome!

Alexis: You got that right, good thing I brought Kasai with us (holding Kasai on a leash)

Wesker: Even I have to admit this place it amazing, Chris should see this (revives Chris)

Chris: (begins trembling out of nowhere and it wasn't from seeing the dragons.)

Siahna: Cool, I love dragons!

Joshua: Wesker time to bathe in blood (pours blood all over Wesker) Now don't move it you want to live.

Claire: I'm going to look around the castle, lets go Siahna.

Siahna: I'll name my dragon Firestar

Sora: This place is great and all but time to go back to the studio people. (uses her authoress powers to send them back to the studio)

**// Back in the Studio //**

Sora: Now before we continue with the last dare of the chapter me, Joshua, and Alexis have to consult with the doctor (drags Joshua and Alexis to the doctors office) Patricia are they ready?

Patricia: yesthey'reready,you'refreetousethem!

Sora: Thanks and here's a raise (hands Patricia $85)

Patricia: Thanksboss (puts the cash in a safe behind a painting of the Arklay Mansion)

Joshua: Sora, what's going on?

Alexis: Yeah, does it have to do with LScollard's dare?

Sora: Yes I was afraid this would happen and someone would be against me so just follow me out and leave the rest.....wait a minute Alexis, you're in the clear so stay here pretend these clones are the real us and keep Wesker in the dark.

Alexis: I shall not fail you (salutes her and leaves the office with the clones to find Wesker reading the LScollard's dare and sees a reflection in his glasses.) A card connected to Sora's bank account, like that's going to happen (pulls out her cellphone and calls the bank to change a few numbers on Sora's bank account then switches out Sora's obsolete card for Hoshi's which she knows she'll regret doing.) Now that we're back time to announce the next dare!

Wesker: Shall I do it?

Alexis: I'm not going to say no since you already have that dare card

Wesker: Thanks dear Alexis, our last dare is from LScollard

_More Dares_

Wesker: For not doing my godfather dare I force you to... give Sianha these  
awesome boxes (They look like presents but when you open them, they give  
anything you want) and take this credit card and use it on her. For Wesker's  
EyesOnly, it is secrely connected to Sora's bank account. Enjoy.

Sora\Joshua: Give all your author powers to each member of the cast. And they  
get to give YOU dares (no retaliation aloud)

Wesker: You've been waiting for this, so... kill Sora.

Chris: While wearing a banana suit, sing Banana Phone in front the whole  
cast. They can kill you if they want.

Sianha: Have My Dog, he's a Golden Retriever. Keep him away from your  
father's viruses (he is not a test subject)

Bye.

Siahna: Thanks for the boxes dad, (opens them and finds a bunch of toys and miscellanious items in the boxes)

Wesker: I reconsider the godfather dare, you're allowed to be Siahna's godfather.

Claire: That's so sweet of him to give Siahna those boxes.

CSora: Joshua we have to do this dare

CJoshua: But we'll be suscepable to death!

CSora: We'll have to live with it, besides Alexis will revive us.

CJoshua: (sighs in relief then gives his author powers to the RE Cast along with CSora)

Wesker: (goes to a random ATM and takes out over $2,000 and goes out to buy Hoshi a late birthday present. Then comes back) Finally, now you die Sora! (epically impales CSora and she dies)

Leon: NO SORA!!! (holding CSora's dead body)

Alexis: You're now on my black list Wesker!

Chris: But I don't like the Banana Phone (puts on the banana suit and starts singing the Banana Phone)

Claire, Alexia, Barry, Frost, Ada, and Rebecca: (kill Chris with magnums and bazookas)

Siahna: Yay, now I have a puppy (hugs the golden retriever) Dad, no experimentation on my dog.

Wesker: Got it darling.

Sora: Hey y'all what'd we miss (comes into the studio wearing Twilight t-shirts and shopping bags)

Wesker: WTF!!! I KILLED YOU!!!

Sora: No that was a clone you killed, I don't appreciate it when reviewers hate the hosts. Also Alexis did you do something to my bank account?

Wesker: Is there any money missing? (Hoping that Sora would say yes)

Sora: No, the account number was changed, the credit card you have is not mine and why is Chris dead again?

CJoshua: He sang the Banana Phone and some of the RE Cast killed him.

Joshua: Thank you and now if you don't mind, drink this (hands CJoshua a blueish-green vial)

CJoshua: okay (drinks the contents and disintegrates)

Sora: Now that the clones are taken care of (turns to Wesker) You are going to the fanpit!!!! (kicks Wesker in the fangirl pit and watches as the fangirl try to get to him)

Alexis: That was the last dare for this chapter and to close the chapter the Zombie Dance Team is going to dance the Caramelldansen Para Para version.

(Zombie Dance Team begins dancing as soon as the music started)

Sora, Joshua, and Alexis: Send in more dares! See ya next chapter!


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil Capcom does, all I own are my OCs.**

Joshua: Alexis! Control Kasai!

Alexis: I'm trying Joshua, Kasai get down from there!!

Siahna: Firestar get back here! (chases after Firestar who was flying with Kasai all over the place)

Sora: As you all can tell I think we have dragons either befriending one another or mating but now we have to do the dares, this one is from Akako Hama

_(Walks on stage) Hey its Hoshi... agian._

Sora: You can either flee the planet or hide in a bomb selter for the next  
dare. If you flee, use the eclipse cannon if things get too bad. (Hands over  
the backup controls)

Wesker: Cousin Albert let's see what happens when you eat fifty pounds of  
sugar. If you refuse I will.

Chris: You must be locked in a room with Charmy the Bee. On a sugar rush.  
He's calling himself the Great Corniholio.

Chris(Agian): It's too fun torturing you. Trisha found out about your date  
with Jill.

Alexis: Do you have any pets?

Frost: Try to cause the collapse of the universe.

Bye. I'll leave when these dares are done.

Sora: Hoshi, happy belated birthday! Here's your gift! (hands Hoshi a shopping bag with a black bow tied onto the handles.)

Hoshi: Thanks Sora, cousin Albert you missed my birthday.

Wesker: Sorry Hoshi, I was in this infernal fic

Hoshi: It's okay, where's my gift?

Wesker: Right here (gets a gun case out of a broom closet and gives it to Hoshi)

Hoshi: Thanks cousin Albert, now time to do your dare.

Wesker: I never had sugar but I can't allow Hoshi to get it (eats the 50lbs of sugar and just stands still)

Excella: Albert are you alright?

Claire: Don't you dare call him that only I can! (punches Excella in the face and gut.)

Chris: Wesker, you alright? (all of a sudden gets his head ripped off by Wesker laughing normally when he really isn't acting normal)

Sora: S*** to the bomb shelter! Joshua, Alexis, Siahna come with me if you want to live! (drags the three to the bombshelter, whose whereabouts will remain undisclosed until further notice)

Alexis: Now we can find out if Wesker's sugar rush is as bad as Hoshi's (hears many explosions) Uhh Sora did Hoshi give an alternative location to hide if this gets out of control?

Joshua: The usual place..... the moon! (quickly goes to the moon with Sora, Alexis and Siahna)

(Seeing Earth from the moon there were many explosions seen on the surface thus making Sora take out the back-up controls to the Eclipse Cannon and pressing the button to destroy Earth)

Sora: Had no choice, it was either let Wesker cause mass chaos and hysteria or destroy the planet.

Joshua: You did what you had to do, now let's fix Earth

Sora and Alexis: okay (uses authoress powers to restore Earth with Joshua then goes back to Earth with Siahna)

Claire: Siahna, thank goodness you're okay (hugs Siahna)

Siahna: Mom..... can't breath!

Claire: Sorry sweetie (releases Siahna and notices Wesker passed out on the Licker bed) Albert!!!!

Bed Inhabiting Lickers: (notice Wesker on their bed but leave him be because they remember him killing them during the sugar rush fiasco)

Alexis: Chris time to be locked in a room with Charmy the Bee on a sugar rush! (shoves Chris in a room with Charmy already in it)

Chris: But I'm allergic to bees!

Charmy: I AM THE GREAT CORNIHILIO!!!! (Stings Chris and dies)

Chris: (Dies from allergic reaction to the bee sting)

Alexia: Redfield's dead. (drags Chris' carcass out of the room.)

Alexis: Thanks for the update (revives Chris) Chris time to deal with your wife who found out about your date with Jill.

Chris: NOOO!!!!!

Trisha: Christopher how dare you cheat on me with that woman!! (drags Chris away to who-knows-where)

Alexis: I kind of consider Kasai as my pet since I love dragons but back in the future I have a dog though he belongs to my mom, me and my brother help take care of him and keep him in tip top condition.

Frost: The only known person to collapse the universe is Hoshi with sugar.

Everyone in the building: NOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hoshi: Give me sugar!

Frost: Here you go (gives Hoshi fifty bags of sugar)

Hoshi: (eats the sugar and goes on a destructive sugar rush and causes the collaspe of the universe)

Sora, Alexis, and Joshua: (uses their author powers to fix the universe and sent Hoshi back to her fic)

Alexis: Now that the idiocy that is Frost is over our next dare is from Multiverse Fan

_Thank you for using my dares! Now for a bit more fun and treacherous dares.  
Chris you will have to confess your 2 deepest most humiliating secret and  
also your 5 worst fears which will be brought to life and you can not lie  
because i gave alexis this helmet that will make you tell the truth._

Wesker you will have to go through resident evil 5 and you have to kill the  
other you to save the world and *snap fingers* your super human powers are  
gone for this dare.

Leon and Krauser you will fight in this hospital. You get to chose any weapon  
in this crate full of hand held guns but if you touch my magnums ill come and  
kill you with it 50 times GOT IT!

OK SEE YA!

Chris: My two most humiliating secrets okay, when I was in the fifth grade it was just after gym class and some guys thought it'd be funny to de-pants me after getting out of the locker room but in the process of depantsing me my boxers went down with my pants in front of my entire class. My second secret is when I took my first girlfriend out on a date my parents sent Claire as a spy and then told my parents all the wrong details and grounded me for over three months and forced me to go to school in a tux for those three months.

Claire: That's true and I constantly apologized to you for those three months, I even told our parents that I misinterpreted.

Chris: Sorry doesn't bring back those three months I lost!

Joshua: Shut up Chris, now tell everyone your 5 worst fears. Also be sure to tell the truth.

Alexis: If you're lying I'll know because I have (reveals a helmet) The Helmet of Truth!

Chris: Alright, I'm not going to like this, but my 5 worst fears are; Alligators, bees, Claire marrying Wesker, the Tails Doll, and Hoshi.

Alexis: Wow he's telling the truth

Claire: Chris, great news!

Chris: You're breaking up with Wesker?

Claire: No, he proposed (shows the diamond wedding ring) we're getting married!

Chris: NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Delivery Man: Package for a Christopher Redfield

Chris: Please don't let it be anything pertaining to Claire's wedding. (takes the package to see an alligator and a beehive) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (runs away but is stung and eaten)

Sora: Joshua, Alexis, Siahna here are the Metal Sonic plushies they'll protect you! (gives the three the plushies and revives Chris)

Siahna and Alexis: From what?

Tails Doll: Time to feel the sunshine (appears before Chris, takes his soul, and uses a kitchen knife to cut him up into pieces) Must have more souls.

Siahna: Aww he's soooo cute! (hugs the Tails Doll while holding onto the Metal Sonic plushie)

Tails Doll: Metal Sonic!!! Get away! (gets out of Siahna's grasp and leaves the RE fic)

Siahna: Aww, the doll got away (pouts)

Sora: I'm afraid we can't get a hold of Hoshi so as her replacement for Chris' last fear I will take her place on a sugar rush. (revives Chris)

Everyone: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sora: (takes out a bagfull of mini kitkat bars and starts eating them)

Chris: Oh god no, please no! Anything but this!

Joshua: Alexis, Siahna time to go to the bomb shelter (leads the two to the bombshelter.)

// After mass destruction and several explosions //

Sora: (giggling in a corner with her flamethrower) Baa, baa black sheep have you any wool? Yes sir, yes sir three bags full. One for the master, one for the dame, one for the little boy living down the lane.

Joshua: That's very random. (comes out of the shelter)

Alexis: Wow, this much destruction from one person on a sugar rush.

Siahna: She's almost as bad as dad and aunt Hoshi.

Joshua: She can be like Wesker on a sugar rush but Sora does have some self control though it's not much.

Alexis: Time for Wesker's dare. (revives all RE cast) Wesker time to go through RE5 as a normal human being and fight your other self.

Wesker: This is going to be disturbing. (gets sent into RE5 by Alexis)

// After an indefinite period of time //

Wesker: I'm back (comes back with several trophies)

Sora: (stops a stopwatch) Damn Wesker you didn't waste any time! You gotten through RE5 within 3hrs 23mins and 33 seconds!

Wesker: I just wanted to get through it all without any interference. Though at one point I did encounter three Reapers in one area.

Sora: I hated that, for some odd reason only I get that 2/7 chance of getting that.

Leon: Why the hell do we have to fight in a hospital?

Krauser: Don't ask me, ask whoever sent the dare.

Alexis: Hey you two time to go to the hospital. (sends Krauser and Leon to the hospital)

**// In a Random Hospital //**

Krauser: Well Leon time to pick our weapons of choice. (picks up a magnum)

Leon: (takes a handgun) Uhh Krauser, didn't the reviewer say NOT to take his magnum?

Krauser: dunno, wasn't paying attention.

Multiverse Fan: How dare you take my magnums (takes back the magnums, kills and revives Krauser 50 times then leaves)

Krauser: I give up, I don't want to go through that again (dies again)

Leon: That was fast. (puts his gun back in the box and leaves to go back to the studio)

**// Back in the Studio //**

Joshua: Poor Krauser, being killed 50 times really takes it toll on someone. (revives Krauser)

Krauser: Don't make me go through that again!

Sora: Don't worry, but now you have to go back to either Zombiegirl2007 or was it LDLR but either way you have to go back to one of them (sends Krauser to one of the two authors)

Alexis: Now time for Tyrant Wolf's dare!

_I'M BACK BABY!XD_

good news fore chris and wesker! i'v got the most evil and disturbing dare of  
all fore them! (DUN DUN DUN!) I dare you two to watch "2 girls and 1 cup!"  
MUAHAHAHAHA!XD

siahna - i'm sorry for eating your dad but a phsycopathic tyrant with a side  
of chocolate covered retard is so DELICIOUS!

Alexia/Alfred - fight each other with giant ear cleaners on top of the space  
needle!

chris - go back in time to 1980 may 18th and stand near the mouth of Mount  
St. Helens! (thats the time it erupted)

barry - dance a frilly little ribbon dance!

frost - *stabs him in the back with several forks* the doctor will see you  
now

Josh - here is a represhion collor now you can eat cow meat again!

thats all I have come up with right now tootles!

Wesker: I'm using my skip card for this, I'm not going to watch something so disturbing. (walks away)

Chris: How bad could this video be? (watches the video in a random room) MY EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (runs out of the room with his hands over his eyes) I'M BLIND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sora: Good thing the rest of us weren't watching. (puts in her headphones and rocks out to "The Game" by Disturbed)

Siahna: It's okay Tyrant Wolf, I forgive you and thanks for eating Uncle Chris!

Alexia and Alfred: How are we supposed to fight eachother on the space needle with ear cleaners!?

Alexis: Like this (hands the twins giant ear cleaners and sends the two to the space needle)

**// At the Space Needle //**

Alexia: There's no way we can fight eachother on this small space?

Alfred: I don't know?

Alexia: On three we hit eachother, ready?

Alfred: Ready.

Alexia and Alfred: One, two, three (hits eachother with the giant ear cleaners and both fall off the space needle to their deaths)

**// In the Studio //**

Alexis: Poor twins, those two never stood a chance. (watches the Ashford's deaths on the news)

Sora: I can agree with you there, hey Chris time for your dare.

Chris: Alright, I'm prepared, what is it?

Joshua: To go back in time, (pushes Chris into his time machine and puts in the coordinates)

**// 1980, May 18, Mt. St. Helens //**

Chris: I'm not liking it up here. I'm just glad that it wasn't like the time where I had to face Wesker in a volcano. (climbing to the mouth of the volcano)

Random Tourist: Hey dude, you like better get away from that volcano or your indubetely going to burn to a crisp. (running down the volcano)

Chris: What the hell is he talking about? (finally gets to the mouth of the volcano and sees the lava beginning to bubble.) What the?

Mt. St. Helen: (erupts and burns Chris)

**// Back in the Present //**

Joshua: (reading a book and all of a sudden sees Chris in the picture standing on the mouth of the volcano and the text reading "The idiot who died in the eruption") Hey everyone Chris died!

Sora: WHAT? (still rocking out to "The Game")

Joshua: (pulls out a headphone) I said Chris died.

Sora: Kay thanks. (puts the headphone back in her ear and goes elsewhere)

Alexis: Barry heres some ribbons and now time to dance with them.

Barry: This is just like the time when my two daughters had these (begins to dance with the ribbons)

STARS Members: (Looks disturbed at the sight of Barry dancing with ribbons)

Frost: NOOOO!!! Wait... which doctor?

Alexis: Hoshi's not here anymore so it's Dr. T-002 you get to visit!

Frost: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (gets dragged to the doctor's office by Alexis and Joshua)

Patricia: NicetoseeyouagainFrost!! (throws a rusty screwdriver at Frost which makes contact with his abdomen)

Frost: F***!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (falls on his side)

Patricia: DoctorFrostisreadytoseeyounow! (pushes Frost in the room)

Frost: Damnit this hurts (manages to pull out the screwdriver but still has the forks in his back)

Hunter Nurse: (places Frost on the operating table)

Frost: Oh god please help me. (tried to curl into a ball but failed)

Dr. T-002: (comes into the room wearing an executioner's mask and roughly pulls out each fork)

Frost: GO EASY WILL YA!!!

Dr. T-002: (takes a fork and stabs Frost in the spine and kills him) He's done (throws him out)

Sora: (comes back without her mp3 and for some reason has a turkey attached to her back)

Joshua: Sora....... why is there a turkey on your back?

Sora: Gift from the family, they expected me to make turkey for a late thanksgiving dinner.

Joshua: ookay.

Sora: Also Joshua, this package came for you, it's from TW

Joshua: Sweet my colar! I CAN EAT MEAT AGAIN!!!! (opens the box and puts on the colar)

Sora: In celebration, here you can eat the turkey (gives Joshua the turkey)

Joshua: Yum, (eats the turkey and afterwards spits out the feathers)

Wesker: Why eat the animal before taking the feathers off? (has a steaming cup of coffee in his hand)

Alexis: Don't bother asking I don't know (revives Chris) By the way Wesker, how's the coffee?

Chris: COFFEE!!! NOO!!!!! (smacks the cup out of Wesker's hand which clenches into a fist)

Wesker: It was BLACK coffee you inconsiderate buffoon!!! (bashes Chris' head in)

Siahna: Here's a fresh cup of coffee dad (gives Wesker another cup of black coffee)

Wesker: Thanks Siahna (drinks the coffee and sighs with content)

Sora: Now while Wesker is enjoying his coffee, our next dare is from darkonxnz

_Your storys soo funny! Now time for the dares. Chris- I dare you to ballet  
dance on public television. Jill- I dare you to go to harpers island and  
survive. Brad - I dare you to hump a chicken. Claire- I dare you to become a  
hooker for one whole chapter. Leon - I dare you to go to forks and become a  
vampire, then come back even hotter then before and sparkly. That's all for  
now :)_

Chris: (gets revived again and told his dare) I don't know ballet!

Alexis: Nows the time to start learning!

(After countless hours of learning Chris gets into his leotard and tutu and begins dancing on public television)

Claire: I'm ashamed to even be related to him (covers her face)

Jill: What the hell is Harper's Island?

Alexis: Its a TV show about some crazed guy murdering guests that attended a wedding on Harper's Island one by one.

Jill: So I have to try to survive that!

Alexis: Sounds like it, have a big bucket of fun Jilly bean!

Jill: Hey only Chris calls me that! (gets sent to Harper's Island)

// After several hours //

Jill: I'm back and alive! (bursts in through the door with a bloody piece of cake)

Carlos: What's with the cake?

Jill: It's for Sergei

Sergei: Really?

Jill: Nope, to be honest I don't know why I have it.

Brad: Why would I hump a chicken?

Sora: Don't ask me and here's a chicken (brings in a chicken)

Brad: This is too weird (begins humping the chicken who is desperately trying to get away.)

Claire: (turns into a hooker)

Steve: Yes, I can get Claire!

Wesker: Don't even think about it, she's mine (holds Claire close to him)

Steve: Damnit

Leon: See ya when I get back (leaves to go to Forks)

// Several hours have passed //

Leon: (comes into the studio and all of a sudden sunlight shines on him and he sparkles like diamonds)

Sora: LEON!!! (glomps him) My mega hot vampire!

Joshua: Let Leon have his space!

Alexis: Time for the last dare for this chapter, this one is from Axeleonth

_Wow, you actually used my dare, thank you. Now I have another truth and  
dare. For Leon, sorry for taking your crush, as apologies, I will take you,  
Ada, and I, and Sherry, Sianha, Lott, Lily and Salazar to Dreamworld, (In  
Australia, if you don't know what that is, Disneyland will be fine), and for  
Leon and Ada alone, I give them a night out at the best resturant in the world  
free, (don't worry about costs, I scared the owners with my Licker and Hunter  
bodyguards into getting a free meal). For Joshua, Alexis and Sora only, the  
date with Ada, (I was hoping for Ada) was actually plans for Ada and Leon, I  
helped her through some stuff. So they will be doing something together._

Now for the rest of you, Josh, because Lickers are awesome, I give you meat  
to last the whole chapter, it is up to Sora to give it to you, so Sora get's  
to control it.

Claire, here is a coupon to get 50% off all child supplies at whatever child  
store you choose.

Wesker, here are some sunnies, wear them. (Josh and Sora, they have a  
tracking chip for the fan girls)

Steve, bash up Alfred for what he did to you.

Chris, you have to learn how to speak Japanese, I don't know why.

Jill, dye your hair back!

Wesker, tell Jill why you put her in a bird costume.

Annette and William, you shall accompany Sherry to Dreamworld/Dreamland if  
you wish.

Hmm, oh and Sora, before I forget, here is a newly upgrade T-103 Nemesis for  
your "duties". Oh and Joshua, because you're awesome, I am giving you the  
ability and resources to upgrade the Licker bed to whatever you feel is right,  
even if you don't do anything. Now I shall be ready for the group soon with  
my Licker and Hunter Alpha bodyguards, (so the kids can get on the rides with  
no lines cause everyone is scared).

Sora: Leon, Ada, Lott, Lily, Siahna, Salazar time for you to go to Dreamworld with Axeleonth

Leon, Ada, Lott, Lily, Siahna, and Salazar: (Leaves to go to Dreamworld)

Joshua: Yes more MEAT!!!!

Sora: Wait till I give it to you! (waits a few seconds) here's the meat (allows Joshua access to the meat)

Joshua: YES!! (dives into the meat with his licker bretheren)

Claire: Good thing I have this coupon, now I'm off to buy Siahna new things (leaves)

Wesker: Alexis give back my sunglasses (holds out his hand for his sunglasses)

Alexis: Here Weskie (hands him the glasses with the tracking chip in them)

Wesker: Thank you Alexis (puts them on and suddenly hears fangirls screaming) What was that?

Alexis: Uh oh the fangirls got loose again (steps out of the way and the fangirls whisk Wesker to the closet)

Steve: Bout time I get to put the hurt on you for what you did to me on Rockford Island (takes a mace off the wall of weapons and proceeds to thrash Alfred with it)

Alfred: Stop you insignificant boy!! (tries to run but Steve keeps bashing him)

Sora: This should be fun, Chris time to learn Japanese!

Chris: Great, first ballet and now Japanese

Sora: Hai, that means "Yes" in Japanese

Chris: This is going to be a loooong time. I'm just going to use Rosetta Stone.

Sora: Fine, have fun getting bored to sleep with it.

Jill: Finally I get to change my hair back (goes to the bathroom and dyes her hair back to brown.)

Wesker: The reason why I put Jill in the bird costume was that it was the only disguise I could think of that could properly conceal her identity.

Joshua: That answered soo many questions Wesker

Sora: Yay I'm going to use T-103 as a bodygaurd so that unwanted pests don't come in like that creepy mailman who keeps looking through the window and spies on the women.

Women of RE: WHAT!!?

T-103: (stands outside the door to the studio and kills the mailman who was climbing up the wall to get to the window)

Joshua: I'm going to add more Lickers to the licker bed and make the bed more fluffy and appealing to those who are tired (uses his abilities and resouces to make the bed to what he wanted)

Sora: Night Joshua! (hops in the licker bed)

Joshua: SORA NOT AGAIN!!!!

Lickers inhabiting the bed: (Leaves Sora alone and just fall asleep on the really fluffy bed)

Alexis: While Sora's asleep, the Zombie Dance Team is going to do an interpretive dance to Berceuse or other wise known as "Lulluby" from RE:CVX!

(Once the spotlight shines on the stage Berceuse starts playing and the zombies begin dancing to it)

Joshua: Send in more reviews

Alexis: Bye bye!!


	18. Haitus

Due to lack of inspiration, I'm putting Resident Evil: Truth or Dare on haitus until further notice so please do not send any dares for the characters please be patient with me and I'll try to find my entertainment muse. -leaves to look for the muse-


End file.
